feeling beat from going nowhere fast

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I feel out of place at wp and pretty much every where else. THe damgage done to me is stubbornly refusing to subside and its preventing me from moving forward and participated on higher levels. I NEED A MIRACULE, AGAIN. i really think i have a curse stuck on me that brings about disaster when i am close to personal growth. I am hoping that my nd gives me the homepathic and that it gets me started again. I want to go a priest about the intense spiriuatal existancial issues i have, but i can until pretty well physically healed, because i will need to be able to conceptualize and articulate whats going on and be able to be taken as credible. Of course these issues tend to sabotage my recovery so its a catch 22.


I dont feel like a can particapate on the aspie level or even feel like one. I pretty much do nothing execetp work 12 hrs a week and go out with the mha once a week and week out a few hours every other day. the rest of the time is total stagnation. hours days weeks fly by without anything serious to show for nor any of the time have been put to real use.

Every interaction and experience you have will add to your storehouse of information, even if it doesn't seem significant now. The longer you accumulate information, the better you will be able to see patterns and eventually anticipate them. Don't push yourself to go faster than you can or should, you will trip over yourself and fall down.

I don't know what damage your are referring to, but I suspect that if you go to a priest and explain your situation, you will at least find a sympathetic listener, and you might find some insight that has escaped you because you are in the middle of your chaos. I myself am extremely skeptical about homeopathic treatments, but if it helps you it must be useful.

Remember this is a place where everybody is sort of out of place. This is one place you won't have to worry about seeming "weird". I'm weird, we're all weird. I can see you are having a hard time, try to go with the flow as much as you can and try to cope with the rest, I guess.

What is mha?

pschiatric drug damage wich was going away after i quit in july, but instead i got into tobacco and 7 pots of tea and had a nueropschoactice supplement acetly-l-cartine, wich created a bad reaction and now im not healing. i had huge metaphysical spirtual pschcosocial dynamic wich cause all sorts of grief before that that led to my downfall. It never really went away and is interfering with recovery right now.

Hi nightbender. Polgara'a comments were wonderful in my opinion. I can relate to the storing of information from experiences. That can make you stronger. I have been relying on that kind of thought myself lately. Something happens---I feel bad---but then I say it must have happened so that I can better deal with things later on. I accept that now. I feel better now.

When I am feeling down, I begin working on my interests. I think we can all find something that we love that can occupy our time and make us feel better. With me, I am writing a science fiction style novel. I may never finish it, but at least I have a 150 pages of it written. I also play solitaire on my computer trying to get higher scores. I study house plans and imagine myself navigating the rooms. I am working on a model roller coaster. These are things I do that make me feel better. Do you have things like that you can try?

Polagara is so right---in ways we are all out of place. That is what makes us a unique family. We exist here in the wrongplanet so similar with autistic issues, but yet so different. Please continue to remain active in the wrongplanet---we all need each other's support. Good luck to you.

You don't have to feel out of place on WP. There are lots of people who would make you feel at home and PM back and forth with you. Like me; you can PM me.


I know how it feels not to be able to articulate your problems. After years of not being able to articulate my problems and feeling sad, scared and angry, finally I was able to articulate them here on WP. I just needed time to do it without more things happening to me to make more problems (which seems to be happening to you-- maybe just as you start to be able to articulate them you get more and suddenly have a big "workload" again; tons of things you need to explain, and that makes it take longer for you to have no problems.)

i had sent an email to someone was helping me recovery asking if there was something more that could be done and instead she basically told me shut up quit whining and be a man and wait for things to work themselves out. i hate this, that there is nothing do except wait and easy answers and avenues of help are closed off.