Well, THIS is a first!

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Usagi1992
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20 Jan 2009, 4:44 pm

As I'm typing this, I feel mad enough to drive a fork through someone's neck! And believe it or not, this time my anger ISN'T aimed towards my dad...

...it's my mom.

And all because she wouldn't let me go from the kitchen until I dried EVERYTHING after doing the dishes. Firstly, I was half asleep when my brother called me down to finish them, so I just wanted to dry a few then finish them later, as my bro had a friend over. But mom hates having the kitchen messy, so she f***ing embarrassed me in front of his friend and forced me to stay until the job was done! Well, the jokes on her...I confiscated and threw away her oldest measuring teaspoon that she'd had since her wedding day...

*sighs* lately my anger to my family has grown so large, I fear it's going out of proportion. The only difference between my dad and my mom is...I can live without that bastard, but she's the lady who gave me my life; having angry, violent thoughts about her scares me. That teaspoon thing was probably petty. but it was a hell of a lot better then pretending to kill her over and over in a video game...

Usagi1992

gina-ghettoprincess
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20 Jan 2009, 4:52 pm

With me it's the other way round. My mum is the worst, but when my dad starts it scares me cos that's not how it should be. I'm used to my mum being evil and pedantic, etc, but when my dad does it it's much worse.

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Greyhound
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20 Jan 2009, 5:00 pm

Couldn't you have given it away instead? I hate old things being thrown away In fact I hate anything being thrown away if it's stil useful

I can't comment on your mum's behaviour though, because I don't know exactly what you did and exactly what she did.

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Usagi1992
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20 Jan 2009, 7:17 pm

Greyhound wrote:

Couldn't you have given it away instead? I hate old things being thrown away

In fact I hate anything being thrown away if it's stil useful

I can't comment on your mum's behaviour though, because I don't know exactly what you did and exactly what she did.

Aww, it's okay...I retrieved the teaspoon from my trash and am keeping it in my room for my own personal use. I figured that something that old has sentimental value, and I'd have missed it so much. But I know what you mean...I'm a sucker for clinging onto things that remind me of my life.

As for your second paragraph, it's just that Mom hates the kitchen to be messy when she comes home from work. Admittedly, I was being a bit of a prick, trying my hardest not to be broken by her in the presence of my brother's friend, but to no avail, hence, the confiscating of the teaspoon.

-JR
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21 Jan 2009, 3:07 am

Heh. The measuring spoon being tossed made me cringe. Have had so many of my keepsakes thrown out.

My advice to you is this-

Look beyond the situation. Give yourself a pause before reacting to anything that angers you. In a situation like the one you are in, if you are right, and your mother is wrong, what is gained? Nothing. Instead, try to focus on the grand outcome, and if that isn't working, at least try to be the better person.

I don't know how a parent can embarrass their own child. Really, that is quite low. If respect and dignity should come from anyone, it should come first from the parents. I hope this doesn't happen often.

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Usagi1992
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24 Jan 2009, 7:45 pm

-JR wrote:

Heh. The measuring spoon being tossed made me cringe. Have had so many of my keepsakes thrown out.

My advice to you is this-

Look beyond the situation. Give yourself a pause before reacting to anything that angers you. In a situation like the one you are in, if you are right, and your mother is wrong, what is gained? Nothing. Instead, try to focus on the grand outcome, and if that isn't working, at least try to be the better person.

I don't know how a parent can embarrass their own child. Really, that is quite low. If respect and dignity should come from anyone, it should come first from the parents. I hope this doesn't happen often.

Thanks for your concern...and I'm feeling MUCH better now. No, me getting embarrassed by them doesn't happen often, but even if it does, they think they have the right because I'm not a human being in their eyes.

cubedemon6073
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14 Feb 2009, 12:18 pm

gina-ghettoprincess wrote:

Gina, I understand. The truth is to all you can do is control your own actions. I know it can be tough to do at times. For me, I am still trying to do it to this day. I have become better at it but it's tough.

As an aside, I have never seen the word mother or mom used in the word form as mum before. I will have to look up where that was derived from.

The same advice goes to you, Usagi. Try setting up the system I suggested between you and your brother in the other thread I posted at.

sunshower
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20 Feb 2009, 8:49 am

Usagi, from all the threads I've read by you in the Haven, it really seems to me that you should consider moving out of home in any capacity that you can. Seriously, do whatever it takes to make yourself independent enough to move out; to me it seems like living at home is destroying you emotionally, which is where the damage is deepest.

Whether your parents mean well or not, no matter who is in the right in what situation, you are in a toxic environment and I can tell it is really hurting you.

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