to chat about yourself and get feedback on things about yourself.
Maybe a few of you can chat with me in this thread? There's no shame in wanting attention or giving attention to someone who wants it. Come on; we can be haooy together. This can be a happy Haven thread.
I'll tell you a bit about myself. I was born Katherine or Katharine May C. Some people call me Kate. Katherine and Kate mean pure or pure and virginal. My last name may mean "coming home" and it means village and milk pail and it's also a name for leaders; it might mean leader as well. It's funny that it means milk pail because me and my father and his father all loved milk. My internet name for 7 years has been Anastassia Florine. Anastassia means resurrection, or rise again, or she who will rise again. Ana means God is gracious, grace, or she who will rise again. Florine means floral or flowers. Therefore Anastassia Florine means reaurrection of the flowers. I didn't mean it to be that way, though. I typed in "Anastassia" into Yahoo to see if anyone had that name spelled that way, because I was into names. One of the results was about someone named Anastassia Florine. I liked the name, so I took it. It had a nice ring to it. When I later realized it coincidentally means "resurrection of the flowers", I decided that that's a nice thing for it to mean, because that can mean "the flowers will come alive again" meaning that the good will always come again.
I love people and nothing they do wrong is their fault. Nothing I do wrong is my fault. Nothing Adverb does wrong is his fault. I love talking to people. I love joking and laughing with people. I'm looking forward to going back to Houston and seeing my boyfriend Adverb and our son "Lars" again, and waking up with them next to me every morning. In the meantime, I have all of you to talk to. And things to do like the adult day program at the hospital, where I'll get/give some good attention. We'll have fun talking about how to be happy.
I used to have a lot of friends on here. I remember PMing with Belle77, i wanna blue, Aradford, Cultus Diabolus, username88, Yoshie777, CockneyRebel, Malachi Rothschild, Icarus Falling, tygereyes, gwenevyn, Kalister1, Berserker, edal, Who Am I, Brittany2907, aspiebeauty87, Sinsboldly, Beentheredonethat, Boof1988, WhiteRaven, Coyote27, GoatOnFire, dalhousie12, benjimanbreeg, rexmas, and many more. I currently have Kilroy, Stinkypuppy, MADDuck, and Fickle Pickle.
I was going to meet CockneyRebel at the Stepping Stones clubhouse in a town near Vancouver, but it never worked out for us with Adverb wanting to get me over the border as quickly as possible when he came up from the US to get me. Rexmas was going to live with us but then Adverb changed the plans and username88, who lived with us for a while, went back home. We also met GoatOnFire for a few hours and apologized to him for being boring and not doing much with him, after he left. Me and Adverb went to meet StephanieCatherine, Poopylungstuffing, aguales, WaxDeejay, MADDuck, and others and we had dinner together and hung out at the werehouse Poopy was making into Super Happy Fun Land. I also hope to meet neopsytox and DigitalChicken with the rest of the group when I go back to Houston. WP people are the most important people to me.
When I was 19 and lived at the YMCA, I liked it because I met so many interesting people. I also went on here a lot on the free-to-use YMCA computers for residents. There was a half-hour limit, but you could stay on longer if nobody was waiting for them. I stayed on there for many hours a day. At night once the night-shift staffer saw me in there a little after closing time and said "Oh, it's you. I don't want to give you s**t." And he told me I cpuld stay on the computer but not to sit in front of the window that looked out into the TV room. The rule that the computer rooms were to be closed after a certain hour was supposedly so that people wouldn't look at porn, but in the daytime when one of the staff was there he couldn't be watching from his computer what we were doing 24/7 and sometimes there were no staff even there.
At that YMCA there was a German lady who had "sensible" opinions about everything, including antidepressants (she said they make you suicidal) but she said she had had a drug problem and she had seemed to sensible to do drugs. She justified her drug use using the same "sensible", "I'm right" tone as she justified her other opinions with; it was wierd.
There was also a writer named Terrance who was tall and had waist-length hair and encouraged me to try medication, saying that I would be on top of things in no time, that I would be so on top of things. I said I was depressed once. He said "Why don't you go to a morgue?" I said I didn't know of any abandoned morgues, so how would I get into a morgue? He said, "You sort of have t be rolled in on a slab..." I think later, when I was talking to MADDuck on the phone, Terrance said he was going to go take sme sleeping pills and go to bed. I thought I should tell him he might die if he took sleeping pills with the Paxil he took and the alcohol he drank, but I felt stupid saying that, so I said nothing. I think that was the night he died of a barbiturate overdose.
Then there was the Bathroom Nazi, Tracy. She stood there in the bathroom plucking her nonexistant eyebrows and doing her hair, forever. She either heard us banging on the walls when we weren't, or she pretended we were to get us in trouble. Once when she was mad at my mother my mother was in the bathroom and said she had to go to the bathroom and Tracy said "I'm sure you do", nastily. Odd thjing to say. She also played her music so lous that the elevator was vibrating from it as it went downstairs. The staff had to open her room up to turn off the music, but they hesitated at first because they wondred if she was dead in there; this was a few days after Terrance was found dead in his room.
There were interesting people at the Y and I wish I was back there. But they're turning it into a rehab center or something now.
27 Mar 2009, 1:44 am
It's a real pain.
Can't sleep at night.
