feeling guilty and over-compensating?

Post Reply New Topic

I end up feeling guilty because of my brain issues and the way I am, when in any type of relationship with people. So I over-compensate by allowing them to behave exactly as they please, even if it costs me deeply.

Does this happen to you? What do you do about it?

Because I know this about myself I often just want to withdraw. It somehow feels like people are evil. I really, really want to interact and have a normal life and love with people, but they just hurt me so much sometimes. And I get confused, because I never really know who is doing what.

I'm in love with someone, and I want to be everything that is good for this person. But I know that I can at times be a hard pill to swallow. People seem so dissatisfied with me. People have such high expectations of me, and I hate that.

It sometimes seems like I am making people treat me like s**t. And therefore I'm afraid of having any kind of relationship.

In a way, by making yourself a doormat, you are making them treat you like s**t.

Well, maybe not 'making', but certainly 'letting'

It's not just aspies that forget about other's feelings: If you don't speak up when someone hurts you, or you don't want to go along with a plan, then don't complain when people don't automatically read your mind, or forget about you.

EDIT: sorry, that sounds a little harsh: I meant that you shouldn't be afraid to voice your opinion or when someone crosses your boundary.

I don't believe you are being 'harsh', just honest. And yes, I do believe it is in many ways my own making.

The reason why, I believe, is because I feel guilty about being different. But then again, the people I'm attracted too are also different. It is growing pains.

being different is not something one should feel guilt about. you are just a brightly coloured thread in society's blanket.