Did you have mean parents?

Post Reply New Topic

I used to think back when. I moved out for a time when I was 14. Ended up getting an apartment with a couple of people at 16. I had to change my view to realize that they were just people that had their own set of issues and ways with dealing with them. I still can't be around my Mom for long without feeling my blood pressure rise. I wasn't an easy person to live with myself. The difficulties I had with my parents pales in comparison to some of the other stuff I have faced. I wish I had it together better and was more successful to help my parents more as they get older.

My parents are not mean. They're very kind, loving, and supporting.

They're not mean and I suppose they did the best they could considering the fact that they gave birth to a black sheep and the fact that neither they choose me, nor did I choose them.

I reckon that if we weren't related they wouldn't want to have anything to do with me, nor vice versa. It's like camel giving a birth to a donkey or a moose - any similarity is purely accidental.

My parents were mean. They never really went along with my interests. They would tell me not to talk and obsess about them. They made me feel bad for having special interests.

I was also starting to develop signs of Depression at the age of 9 and I did a fair bit of crying. They didn't comfort me at all. They just kept on sending me to my room, over again.

My mum was also threatening to put me on a diet at that age, because I wasn't thin and dainty like most 9 year old girls or children of both genders for that matter.

My parents backed off for a few years and than they decided that it was wrong for me to have a Cockney accent because none of the kids around Southern British Columbia spoke like me. They kept on telling me not to talk through my nose in order to get me to lose that Cockney twang. It never worked

There was my time as a Beatles Fan. I was constantly told not to talk about them, and that if I said anything about The Beatles on the way to to see our American relatives, that we were going to turn around and come back home. There was also this other time that my dad threatened that he was going to threaten to send me to my room for the rest of the day, if I mentioned anything about The Beatles. It was also the summer after, that my mum told me that I was hooked on The Beatles as though they were a drug and that it wasn't healthy for me to be so.

Due to the whole thing surrounding The Beatles, my parents are stuck with a ghost who only says a few words about the things that they might be interested in, and than goes off on to her laptop, listens to The Kinks on YouTube, posting on WP and just keeping to herself never to hear about The Kinks, ever. Not after June the 27th, 2010 and never before.

I don't know if I'd call them mean or not. It depended on the situation. Indifferent might be a better term if I had to apply one.

My dad was a good guy to others but seemed not to want to invest much care into how my brother and I were raised or how we'd turn out as adults. He seemed more interested in other kids as if his went good enough. As long as we were quiet, looked presentable, and didn't cause him to go out of his way nothing about us mattered very much.
He was very unpredictable, inconsistent, and moody. He liked to move a lot and most of those moves were within one county. Buy or build a house, get settled in, then start talking about moving again with no apparent gain in doing so other than just because. This really drove me nuts more than the other s**t. About the time I was starting to be accepted for my unusualness (after some fighting sometimes) and settling in to what could be considered a normal setting we'd be moving. Since we had a good roof over our heads and food on the table we had no grounds for complaint in his view.

My mother was distraught with all the moving and all the other inconsistencies but never had the courage to stand up to the old man in a meaningful way. Even though it was evident to her that both my brother and I had developmental disorders of some kind she buried her head in the sand. They both did.
"There's nothing wrong with you, you're just feeling goddamn sorry for yourself!".
She was frigid toward us then but now that she's getting older she wonders why we're frigid and indifferent.
I told her one time that you reap what you sew and I got that clueless look. Clueless my ass, I call it selective amnesia occasioned by guilt.

Rant over

No

I thought my mom was mean when I was little but looking back I think a lot of it was because of my AS issues & my physical disabilities that they were not really aware of let along understood. She had my best interest at heart & was doing the best she could but her approach did NOT work with me. I was born with lots of problems due to bad DNA(f#cking genetics) that no one in my family seems to have. My mom's done much more for me than most parents would of done for their kids. My dad mostly only seemed mean when I had arguments with my mom. He's very easy going & in his own world a lot & not to emotional unless something happens with my mom. I never been really close emotionally with my dad let alone my mom.
I did not vote in this poll because none of the 4 options suited me. I'm more complicated & maybe being difficult here(my mom often says I'm being difficult) My vote would be my mom seemed mean to me but was not & my dad only seemed mean when my mom got upset.
I never thought I'd understand that when I was younger but I started looking back a little differently after feeling kind of like a parent with someone years ago

they're good people, and I love them
doesn't help I was batshit insane growing up but they did well and I love them

2 solid people

My mum can be a b***h when she wants to. She's the perfect example of then "hysterical" women they used to talk about in the olden days. Neurotic as f**k and gets her hair off all the time and screams and shouts over tiny things. I like her sometimes though, she's the first person I go to when I'm anxious about something, or if I fancy a good conversation and she's brought me up just fine and is actually a good parent. So she's not all bad, but most of time I dislike her and I can't wait to leave home in the future, I'd go now if I had the money, and if I could I'd live miiiiiiiles away.
My dad is my preferred parent, I get on with him well enough.

.

My dad used to be very very mean but now he's nicer. I don't really feel like recalling everything that has happened.

My parents were psychologically and sometimes physically abusive. My father gave me love and attention until about 10 years and then turned on me. I became the scapegoat for both parents.

Despite this, I am thankful. I've been around long enough to realize that it could have been much worse, AND they were also "mean" like the OP. That, I am thankful for, and never thought they were being mean at those times. Perhaps because I knew what mean really was. It's relative. They loved/love me as much as they could. Dad is gone now. I am closer to Mom than I ever was, but it is a painful relationship at times.

Not both but my dad could have been a Spartan, since that is the way he did his upbringing with me and my brother. Mother was far to nice to supplement my needs.

Reminisicing I am happy he did give the discipline, but not the space to grow.