The B*tching And Moaning Thread

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Why is it that every time I start gagging over something, my dad gets angry at me and tells me it's all psychological? Well, yeah, it probably is psychological, but he should be nice to me instead of getting irritated.

I want to be well again. I want to get out there and explore my city. again.

Some people should watch what they say or do and not spend time on questioning my actionrs nor words..

I've come down with a cold, so today I sound like Tom Waits. I'd sing, but it hurts to do so.

My NT brother keeps moaning about his NT daughter leaving her dog with him, I've told him shoot it, eat it, do something with it, throw it's bone over a cliff, just stop going on about the stupid dog, you brain dead, numb wort, excuse for life, NT numpty, who could'nt do anything with the family brain cell, even if he had it!

Phew, better now.

i am really pissed of with my school blocking the website i created with my friends, tis a fine website with no content that should be blocked

quakes suck. china syndrome sucks even more.

I just kind of hate everything. f**k it all.

I feel like I've wasted my entire childhood running away from all of my problems that I was too helpless to control... and I don't care if I'm 18, I don't see the chance to start over again, I want to keep running away. Escapism.

And in the next hour or so I'll probably get pissed off about something mild and hate things even more. I think I'm starting to develop more Borderline Personality Disorder characteristics lately. Basically, I'm going crazy... some schizophrenic characteristics, some obsessive-compulsive characteristics, some others, and just a bunch of social anxiety and depression just all over the place.

I feel the exact same as you. I just want to run far away from here, away from everybody I hate.

I'm not hurting anybody by living in a time warp.

i'm not hurting anybody by merely being the way god made me.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoznjbKVnmw[/youtube]

Pretty much.

Maybe... actually, lately I can just describe it as a mindf**k. I'm convinced no one could ever like me, even as a friend. The notion of anyone ever loving me, on the other hand, is a joke, I don't believe in love anymore. I've never felt it. It's an illusion. Or a conspiracy? Could be. Nevertheless, I'm just in a trap; I'm convinced no one cares about me. A pretty depressing perception. That perception became my reality for years, and now it's being shook upside down. Apparently, others really do care about me? I'm offended by this. That's not fair to me or them, they deserve better than to deal with me. "Go away! No, come back! No one was there for me... wait, why are they here now? That's preposterous! Don't waste your time, just leave. Wait, don't leave me!" Then there's "God"; I'm not content with the idea of him loving me like all others. I'd just be a burden. Now, I have opportunities to make friends, for once, an opportunity. I thought I longed for it, but forget it, I don't want it, I just want to run away! To keep causing myself loneliness.

Just the beginning of this psycho/theolo/philosophical mess...

God, I need to see a therapist so bad lol... next Monday can't come soon enough. Hopefully by then I haven't been triggered by anything to make me suicidal or self-injurious. The latter I'd probably jump right towards if there was no one who cared about me, no one watching to make sure I don't do it.

I want to run away. :S

I hope this qualifies as bitching and moaning. If not "Haven"-worthy. But meh, I'm not quite a "true aspie" so I wouldn't be welcome to post there or something. God only knows if I have that diagnosed, my current official diagnoses are outdated by now and likely incorrect, and awkward, and a true list of my current diagnoses would be a mess. But the aspie-ness doesn't really seem to go beyond personality traits... not that I have a good idea of what my personality is, anyways.

I just want to stop being sick so that I can get a normal night's sleep.

My head hurts. It feels like a worm is inching his way between the lobes of my brain.

Well my super new mattress arrived..........BUT it is a king size and I ordered a double.