Why can't we refer to our parents by their real names?

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Spacie
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23 Mar 2011, 8:26 pm

Why do we have to call them Mom and Dad (or variations)?



Fudo
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23 Mar 2011, 8:31 pm

you don't. :?



blue_bean
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23 Mar 2011, 9:35 pm

Because it seems detached I guess. It would seem like you're denying the child-parent bond if you don't call them mum & dad.



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23 Mar 2011, 9:53 pm

I would think mostly because calling them by their names would, in a way, be a subversion of the hierarchical social structure of the family. Calling them Mom and Dad (or variations) is, within the family, like referring to strangers as Sir or Ma'm; titles, basically. Calling them Mom and Dad is a sign of familial respect for, and recognition of, your elders. Family security is built on established social order and respect, after all.


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nick007
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24 Mar 2011, 12:38 am

The kids did that in that book To Kill a Mockingbird. It sounded weird


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24 Mar 2011, 12:48 am

I'd love to call my parents by their real names to get them back for all the times that they've screwed up while giving me dicipline, between the ages 4 and 8. :twisted:


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Kiran
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24 Mar 2011, 4:06 am

Here in Sweden, it's not that uncommon for kids to call their parents by their real names. It sounds kinda weird. I don't call my mum by her first name but I call my step-father by his first name, because I don't consider him to be my dad.


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Konpaku
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24 Mar 2011, 4:55 am

Why not do it? I suppose the ultimate reason is to convey respect, but I do respect my parents and occasionally call them by their first names rather than "mum" or "dad".

If you really want to do it and you mean no harm, simply refer to the manner in which parents occasionally call their children by their first names and occasionally call them "son" or "daughter".

It's really no different and isn't meant in disrespect, however I suppose it is conveyed that way - rather like if you were to address a teacher by their first name rather than Sir.

It differs from family to family but if it matters that much to you, just try to explain that it isn't out of disrespect that you wish to be on first name basis.



nodice1996
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24 Mar 2011, 6:02 am

I also refer to my step dad by his 1st name, but it would be pretty disrespectful to call my actual parents by their 1st names.


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aspi-rant
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24 Mar 2011, 6:08 am

i am sometimes referred to as PPT...

it was coined when my former stepdaughter an my daughter were pondering about how to call me... my kids call me "pappa"... and my real name is peter... so i was a "pappa-peter-thing"

or short:

PPT

:lol:



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24 Mar 2011, 11:19 am

I can imagine myself walking into my parents upscale trailer saying, Hey Warren! Hey Ina! How are you doing? :lol:


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Xeno
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24 Mar 2011, 12:17 pm

I've thought about this too. I know I'd feel weird if my parents called me "Son" all the time.



emlion
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24 Mar 2011, 12:18 pm

it's a mark of respect.



kx250rider
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24 Mar 2011, 1:01 pm

It's a little different for various cultures. In my family (Colonial American/New England Victorian), it's proper to refer to your parents when introducing them as "Mr. & Mrs. (last name)". In private, it's OK to use Mama and Papa in my family's case, or whichever nickname is used in any particular family. It's considered impolite to use the first names of adults under any circumstances, if you're not yet an adult, and it's impolite to use the first names of an adult even if you are an adult, when there are children present.

But that's not true in all parts of American culture... It's perfectly OK to use first names in most places nowadays. I still would not do so in formal situations, though. And I still call my father-in-law and mother-in-law "Mr. & Mrs.", as I want to show respect and gratitude for their blessing me with their daughter as my wife. It just seems respectful that way. I'm 44, and they're in their mid 70s, and from a well-respected Texas heritage family.

Charles



gramirez
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24 Mar 2011, 9:14 pm

I always call my parents by their real names.


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CockneyRebel
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24 Mar 2011, 9:51 pm

Now that I'm in a better spot and I'm not so bitter anymore, I'd rather be calling my parents mum and dad than by their real names.


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