What's the last weirdest dream you had?

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didn't hafta go. but mebbe my brain itself had some carlinesque brain droppings to drop off into reality? i have indeed been rather timid life-long, as i am just too slow and frail to confront brassholes with their $#!+ they like to fling at me.

i dreamt i was in a strange new fancy hospital with apartments for its workers, this was in Georgia someplace near the water, perhaps Savannah, a place in which i have never visited in waking life. the streets however looked like the landlocked city of Atlanta, a city i have visited. i looked out from the hospital outside on a veranda, and saw a gravel path leading to a large body of water with dense forest on the distant opposite shore. everywhere in the hospital was glass and glossy blond wood roundly contoured, very organic kind of architecture like something out of one of those fancy shiny coffee table magazines in a swanky home. i was in my apartment looking out the floor-to-ceiling picture window when i heard a knock at my door, and it opened and crowds of medical tourists came in and wandered through my apartment, led by some young asian woman in a pink and white summer dress and sandals. one of the tourists pointed to his wife and asked me if i was familiar with what happens in difficult births, and i described a suction apparatus that is sometimes used in lieu of obstetric forceps. he seemed amazed when i told him it was hand-operated. then i found myself outside on the ground floor watching traffic drive by the street in front, and saw a black station wagon driving on the gravel path from the water to the street. this dream felt like i was there, it was so real!

I had a dream this morning in which I was going to the hospital for outpatient exploratory brain surgery. In the dream, this was while my parents were both still alive and they were going to drive me to the hospital and back.

On the other hand, we were going in a cargo van with a sofa in the back for me to lay down on and rest while driving. The cargo van is one that I'm just now considering buying.

i dreamt i was at a table and eating marmalade spaghetti [pasta covered with marmalade] and some rotten stalks of celery which were sour and smelled bad.

This morning I dreamed that I was prescribed some kind of painkiller to help deal with the side affects of my thyroxine but that I hadn't been taking it. In the dream I kept wondering what kind of side affects would need a painkiller, especially side affects from thyroxine.

I had the tigerfield dream again. It's my most common recurring dream. At some point in a long, rambling dream, I have to cross a field in which a whole load of lions and tigers are standing around like a herd of cows. Sometimes I find a way around the field, sometimes I chicken out, and sometimes I veeeeerrrrryyyy sssssllllloooowwwwllllyyy sneak my way through the big cats, freezing whenever one looks up. I've never dreamed of them catching me yet.

Am I the antichrist? LOL I had a recurring dream ( when I was 12 ) where a kid is walking down a garden path, everything is very pleasant and then the realization that that kid will cause WW3! And then the horror, THAT KID IS ME! At 12 my parents were divorcing and maybe the dream was a cathartic way to confront the death of my childhood.
2 years ago I dreamt that I was married and the dream was so real! I remembered how we met and a thousand other details. Then we realized that it was only a dream. As the mist rolled in we cried and said our final goodbyes.
10 years ago ( when I was married) I woke up laughing. My wife asked why. I told her that I had just told myself a joke I had never heard before! ( We can discuss the philosophical ramifications later * ) In the dream I was watching TV . On the screen was a Jesus face. The announcer asks, " what would Jesus do?" Then answers his own question ." he would switch to camels." Jesus then lights up a cigarette ! I think the dream was about the commercialization of spirituality.
* The trinity of dreams. We are the actor, the playwright and the landscape designer. A lion jumps out and surprises us. How is that possible?

Reminds me of a dream I had. Like your 12 year old dream it was prompting by a "life passage". I was about to graduate from college (so my adolescence/childhood was about to end,and supposed adult was about to begin so to speak). I dreamt that I had died, and gone to Heaven. And it turned out that Heaven bore a strong resemblance to Kenwood Country Club down the road (that folks even more affluent than our family belonged to). Trees and grass, and a little stone house shaped offices were ladies drive up and drop off their children for tennis lessons, and the like. Certainly a nice place.

I checked into the office. In the conversation with young ladies at the desk it came up that Ludwig Van Beethoven "usually plays tennis on Tuesday afternoons". I was baffled and said "Beethoven has been dead for centuries...how can THAT be???". Everyone laughed, and I realized "I forgot. This is Heaven. Folks who have been dead centuries live here." Then I got excited and said well I would like to introduce him to my buddy, who is a musician ( I real guy I knew then who played country guitar). Later I did get to introduce the two. But both were self-involved jerks, and neither were interested in speaking to other. So I got angry and just struck out on my own. Took a brisk hike across the golf course. It was overcast, but the gray sky was pleasant and calming. Then it sank in that WOW ...the day of my death is not ahead, but behind me.. And that caused me to feel a certain profound calmness, and Buddha like bliss, until I realized that..."HEY, this is just a dream! And I gradually woke". Quite a dream, that one.

That other dream of Christ on TV: when asked the question in an interview Larry Flynt responded with "Yes. I think that Jesus Christ was the type of guy who would read Hustler Magazine."

Well...I guess that Jesus was a blue collar carpenter type. Probably not in the demigraphic for Penthouse. So who knows?

The idea of Christ endorsing any modern commercial product (Burger King over McDonalds say) whether the product is a sinful vice, or not, is laughter inducing to me.

Unless I put an effort and intent on having a pleasant dream, my dreams turn out to be weird, frightening, warped replays of an unpleasant past event, etc.

i dreamt i was in some public area and dick van dyke [the actor] met me, embraced me and engaged me in conversation. he was dressed in dark charcoal slacks, tan penny loafers, purple and black button-down sweater with white shirt and black tie. then i dreamt that i was with 3 other guys, we piled into an early 70s model off-white fiat 128 sedan and drove around town, i was amazed at how roomy and smooth and quiet that car was [unlike in real life].

I was in a hospital and they wheeled a naked man past me. He looked like a football player and he just had an operation but they didn't cover him up and I didnt see any stitches. His father was following behind the stretcher crying and praying out loud. I kept telling the father he should cover him up with my sweater because he also looked cold.

I dreamt that I greeted some webcomic characters at the door to my house and invited them inside.  The interior resembled a working-class four-room flat I had rented back in the early 1980s.  I selected a few of the characters to follow me through a secret door into a part of the same house that was larger than the exterior and furnished in a luxurious manner, just like those wealthy people's mansions you might see in a Korean drama program on TV.

Then I woke up.

Last night I dreamed I was playing a gig, which is something I don't expect to do again IRL for a while yet. For my last song, I didn't have a guitar. Instead I accompanied myself by plucking notes out of my clothes. The audience loved that- it got me my best applause of the night. Also, it was a real song but I'd changed the chord progression in the dream. Right after I woke up, that bothered me as much as the musical-clothes thing.

I've occasionally dreamed about characters from "Narbonic," a webcomic that helped me through a particularly grim part of my life.

i dreamt i was inside the upper story living room of a fancy rich person's condo in some ritzy condo park in some big city somewhere, there was blond wood inside all over, modernist furniture, thick berber-style carpeting, a sort of jade-ish white, my feet sank into it. on a hidden audio system i was hearing frank sinatra, reproduced perfectly, singing "all the way." i looked out the window at the city scape, the sky was bright gray, there was a park below, there were no people visible. in this place there were no earthly worries.

Not exactly a dream, but recently, when I was trying to get to sleep, I looked over at a pile of coats. In the dark, the coats looked like the girl from The Ring. However, even weirder still she had a mermaid's tail instead of legs.