How has gratitude changed you?

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You read and hear all about it - have more gratitude and your life will improve.
I have felt grateful for what I have and I do feel better, like right now.

Does anyone have stories or experiences of how gratitude played an impact on their life?

I am really greatful for both my Mum, answered prayers and the UK benefit system as without it, when I crashed I was in a mess.

I think that to see the positives rather than the negatives are helpful. I have been too negative when I was in a situation in the past having had years of no income after mentally crashing several times where I needed to recover so I couldn't work or describe what I was going through so I had no help. (Last time the autism team helped me claim benefits as when I last crashed, I was already on their list to be assessed. So I am REALLY greatful).

The future... We do not know how things will pan out, but take it a day at a time and do what we can for the day. That is all we can do in life? And if we can't, we relax and say "Help!"

Very badly.

It was forced upon me without ever explaining to me, growing up.
Now saying "thank you" felt very unnatural and cringy that no amount of gratitude practice felt good.


Like how I eventually learnt humbleness, I don't think I'll learn what gratitude and appreciation ever actually means by having "not enough" (or by living with scarcity in case of my upbringing).

I think I can only ever learn such concepts by sheer contrasts of experiences and nuance, not being stuck at one place (whether lack or excess) then "BOOM!" realize 'this is all I ever get, I should be grateful'.

So far, no amount of grace and luck made me thankful. No amount of kindness did, no amount of leniency did.

Probably because it was unasked for. Unanswered, unexplained. Thus I still consider myself as one of those ungrateful types.


If I ever learn gratitude, it probably meant I already got most of everything I wanted in life.

It's likely that I'd be able to be appreciative if I were more independent and be reliably living my own life, than being more or less dependent (or having to be forced into interdependence) on the kindness of others and fate itself even.

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I'm not much of a one for gratitude. The Big People used to tell me I should say thank you, so I learned to do that mostly to avoid their wrath.

I'm not sure I believe that it does much good to be more grateful. You feel what you feel, and you don't feel what you don't feel. Usually I appreciate it when somebody or other has done something useful for me. But I don't think it changes my life much. I doubt that consciously trying to practise gratitude is helpful, unless the subject was especially ungrateful and arrogant in the first place.

I think being appreciative of ones basic needs being met is something that can lead to better mental health. Dwelling on the 'what ifs' of life or what you haven't got or comparing oneself to what others have who have more than oneself is likely to lead to feeling less optimistic and possibly more miserable.

I've never heard of this before

No, I'd never heard of it either till I saw this thread and looked around. Apparently it's been a big thing in the media. That explains why I've never heard of it. I don't bother much with the media.

I don't see any proposed mechanism for this gratitude thing improving mental health. It seems more an empirical thing that some say research has shown, but opinion on what research shows is divided. On the contra side, there's this:

"Go ahead and be grateful for the good things in your life. Just don't think that a gratitude intervention will help you feel less depressed or anxious. In a new study, researchers analyzed results from 27 separate studies that examined the effectiveness of gratitude interventions on reducing symptoms of anxiety and depression. The results showed that such interventions had limited benefits at best."
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2 ... 130010.htm

What exactly is the subject supposed to do in order to get this supposed mental health benefit? Seems to be about writing "thank you" letters to people who have helped them, and thinking of 3 things that went well and reflecting on them.

Isn't it just a new flavour of the "think positive" movement? Like standing in front of the mirror and saying "Every day, in every way, I'm getting better and better." Maybe I'm just too good a critical thinker to be susceptible enough to suggestion for such interventions to work on me. It's the same thing that makes me relatively immune to sales talk and marketing ploys from sellers, preachers, politicians, and other likely unscrupulous people. I can't psyche myself up any more successfully than they can psyche me up. And I wouldn't want to be more suggestible.

I thank me very much for keeping myself alive and for somehow getting here with very little outside intervention

^
I've pulled myself out of a lot of elephant traps too. But I'm not especially grateful to myself. I mean what else was I going to do, leave myself to rot?

I think there's this useful thing called realism, where we give credit where it's due, instead of just selectively looking for good in people. Usually people are a mixture of good and harm.

I think giving gratitude should be saved for the people who collect Oscars and the likes

They seem to have a whole stream of people to thank

If I had that many people around me I think I would have been locked up for the protection of myself and others a long long time ago

Gratitude helped me to realize how lucky I am.

I agree with all of the above. People are at their best when they are authentic. There is value in reading each of your responses.

Very wise, every one.

Thank you for this thread.