I'm only speeding because I have to poop.

Page 1 of 2 [ 22 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

NewTime
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Apr 2015
Posts: 2,017

15 May 2019, 3:35 pm

I'm only speeding because I have to poop.



Sandpiper
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 11 Dec 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 493
Location: UK

15 May 2019, 3:37 pm

A work colleague has a sticker saying this on their work locker.


_________________
Autism is not my superpower.


nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,622
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic military dictatorship called USA

15 May 2019, 7:43 pm

Someone my dad worked with sh!t his pants on his way home :lol:


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


PurpleReject
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2019
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 220
Location: California

15 May 2019, 8:22 pm

I've seen that sticker, but because I take everything so literally I have so many logistical problems with it. What about whenever you're NOT speeding? Or parked? And what if you DON'T have to poop? I guess as someone who takes driving and pooping seriously, I shan't be putting such a phrase on MY car. :nerdy:



auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,561
Location: the island of defective toy santas

15 May 2019, 8:59 pm

reminds me of that "i'm goin' nuckin' futs!" bumper sticker



Rustifer
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 1 Mar 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 143
Location: Outside

16 May 2019, 1:08 am

My lower intestine feel tense all of a sudden.



auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,561
Location: the island of defective toy santas

16 May 2019, 1:46 am

been my experience that tense is better than loose :oops:



CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 116,945
Location: In my little Olympic World of peace and love

17 May 2019, 12:59 pm

That Depend's.


_________________
The Family Enigma


lostonearth35
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Jan 2010
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,696
Location: Lost on Earth, waddya think?

17 May 2019, 1:15 pm

Is getting yourself or somebody else horribly injured or killed in a car accident actually better than having a potty-related accident? :?

And of course, if you don't get hurt but cause injury to someone else, you're going to have to explain to cops, a judge and jury about why you were driving so fast. That would be embarrassing enough, but if the judge says you'll have to start wearing diapers while in jail, you are so not going to be safe. 8O :lol:



naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 69
Gender: Male
Posts: 35,189
Location: temperate zone

17 May 2019, 1:35 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
That Depend's.


:lol:

You capitalized the second word, so the pun must be intentional!



Misslizard
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jun 2012
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 20,481
Location: Aux Arcs

18 May 2019, 1:32 am

“When you’re cruising in your Chevy and you feel something heavy,
It’s Diarrhea,Diarrhea.”
From the Diarrhea song


_________________
I am the dust that dances in the light. - Rumi


PurpleReject
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2019
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 220
Location: California

18 May 2019, 1:57 am

lostonearth35 wrote:
Is getting yourself or somebody else horribly injured or killed in a car accident actually better than having a potty-related accident? :?


Also, you could always, like...pull over? To a rest stop? Public restrooms have been a thing for quite some time...

I'll reluctantly admit, though, I've been in many situations where I've really had to go while driving, but I've never speeded as I've always been good at holding it...except one time (it wasn't #2, just to clarify). Not fun at all, but definitely better than a car accident!



naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 69
Gender: Male
Posts: 35,189
Location: temperate zone

19 May 2019, 9:21 am

PurpleReject wrote:
lostonearth35 wrote:
Is getting yourself or somebody else horribly injured or killed in a car accident actually better than having a potty-related accident? :?


Also, you could always, like...pull over? To a rest stop? Public restrooms have been a thing for quite some time...

I'll reluctantly admit, though, I've been in many situations where I've really had to go while driving, but I've never speeded as I've always been good at holding it...except one time (it wasn't #2, just to clarify). Not fun at all, but definitely better than a car accident!


Presumably the reason for the predicament is that there are no rest stops, nor gas stations, or whatever, on that stretch of road.



nick007
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,622
Location: was Louisiana but now Vermont in capitalistic military dictatorship called USA

19 May 2019, 9:25 am

naturalplastic wrote:
PurpleReject wrote:
lostonearth35 wrote:
Is getting yourself or somebody else horribly injured or killed in a car accident actually better than having a potty-related accident? :?


Also, you could always, like...pull over? To a rest stop? Public restrooms have been a thing for quite some time...

I'll reluctantly admit, though, I've been in many situations where I've really had to go while driving, but I've never speeded as I've always been good at holding it...except one time (it wasn't #2, just to clarify). Not fun at all, but definitely better than a car accident!


Presumably the reason for the predicament is that there are no rest stops, nor gas stations, or whatever, on that stretch of road.
Or someone(more so with women I think) is afraid to sit on a public toilet seat


_________________
"I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
~King Of The Hill


"Hear all, trust nothing"
~Ferengi Rule Of Acquisition #190
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Ru ... cquisition


Misslizard
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jun 2012
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 20,481
Location: Aux Arcs

19 May 2019, 9:50 am

IBS on I-40 thru parts of New Mexico.Long way between restrooms and no cover on the side of the road.


_________________
I am the dust that dances in the light. - Rumi


lostonearth35
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Jan 2010
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,696
Location: Lost on Earth, waddya think?

19 May 2019, 10:20 am

My mother and I went on our annual road trip on Mother's day, and there's a lot of driving with no bathrooms or buildings at all.

And I find the fact that there are no bathrooms for dozens of kilometers makes you feel the need to go even worse. :(