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Feels like I'm just biding my time, but for what? I'm not going to be able to work anytime soon. I thought I was going to be looking at getting my own apartment or something sometime in the not-too-distant future, but it looks like that's at least going to take a lot longer than I'd anticipated, if it's even going to happen at all. In the meantime, I keep going to therapy sessions (seven crammed into five days a week, three of them for three hours each) that don't help and taking a bunch of medication to at least get me to the point where I'm no longer seriously thinking of killing myself anytime soon, but why? I really wish I'd just die of natural causes already. I'm just so tired of living.

^^ I feel ya man. Sometimes ya just get to thinking, why the hell is it even worth it?

~'7 cups.com' a website I mean to go on depending on how things wind down at work (September the 3rd)..

I know that if it's really bad fortunately I can cheaply go to counselling the day after but I would rather not, not only to 'develop my threshold' but b/c I would prefer to go to thrice to the three planned dates for September and I would like to think that I wouldn't feel like 'going again(?) for the same reason.

One person I've steadily come to be weary of: may hegemonic extroverted hyper-masculinity (i.e. 'rhymes with mooch-baggery' in my mind) rot in a pit with it's own negligent indifference.

I deeply think that the job (dishwashing) requires 2 persons: one to actually do the arrangement of cookware for washing and another to put away things which stack up in dangerously unsuspecting ways

Old excerpts
____
Aug 07, 2014

"I can type,drive and do well in this program.
I can type,drive and do well in this program.
I can type,drive and do well in this program.

TRIGGER: HIDE TRIGGERING TEXT.
I'm guessing that the older you are the more puerile masturbating is seen as?.


"Destiny is defined by freedom as much as freedom is defined by destiny"

"Freedom is doing not what you want to do but what ought to be done."-said by someone last Saturday.

..What does destiny mean to me?. To be honest I don't know. To me,(so far) destiny just sounds like predetermination with more grandeur to it,likes it the one grand culminated act,deed or occurence to which all past desicions have unwittingly or unassumibily been going to in direction. When you say "it's everyone's destiny to die" ,it makes sense in a bunch of ways in our biological being-centric mind. When you say "it was my destiny to be the one born", to me at least... not so much. I mean don't get me wrong,great for you to be have been concieve,be alive and kicking but to say that you were the one (with the x quality laden personality which comprises your identity) who was meant to be born to be destined to do x action?.. meh,\ / . To say that it's everyone's destiny to be a saint?.. .

Prior to the time this gets posted for the first time I will not look up destiny on wikipedia and "spoil the surprise" .

"^_^In spite of whatever "heat on it" that a person can exude, Catholicism is one denomination recognizing and espousing free will and not predetermination. But the word destiny is still brought up. I don't feel to inclined to dwell on it for now, to be honest even though right now is this vibe that vital things are at stake with the idea of 'destiny' .

Freedom however?.What does freedom mean to me?.. .. A LOT . I sure appreciate freedom, I'll say that at the least,thank you very much. What the person said on Saturday makes me think that freedoms ties to duty and duty eventually expounds into destiny,somehow
-----------------

On the 25th I'll be able to get a bus pass again and tomorrow the 2014 TMNT movie will be out ! .

-u- Worth getting back to: years ago (even sometime before the "their going to be aliens" stink-up) ,I heard that the action was going to be on par with "The raid". Even though I've only gotten a cursory exposure to the various non-"G-rated" tmnt comics , I still can't see the turtles fighting as forcefully or even violently as a Malyasian SWAT team in an apartment building overtaken by like a drug dealing operation..nor would I really want them to '~' (on screen anyhow) . From the look of the trailers so far (and I do hope the movie is at only par with what's been exposed in the trailers), it might end up being a martial arts equivalent to the Transformers movies which is okay with me and with me thinking that it'll be a bit odd to see it's and know by the logo it's association with Nickelodeon studios..

Meh, http://www.comicbookresources.com/?page ... e&id=54627 , I still think it'll be fine in spite of this spoiler laden review. I gotta get some sleep.

>_<...to get a comp sci lv.1 certificate now you have to do the hefty Java programming class which I got thru essentially by cheating my way thru x_x,-_- ."

Sep 14, 2014

"
-_- "Modelling" a recent line of arguement w/my dad?..

D: A

X: Feedback to A

D: continue on A

X: +feedback to A

D:Take A and go to B (A--->B)

X: Amplify feedback to A and dampen position of D

D: continues on B, maybe dampening position of X

X: gives some final feedback or comments and leaves ,-_- knowing it's better not to continue w/someone who is more inclined to continue his own one-line train of thought than to continue giving feedback when he can't properly address feedback to A by X and continues with organic fluidity with A in spite of how X says that he's ignoring his reply to A,A is irrelevant,A is no longer relevant,your not responding to what X is *presently* saying etc"

"Sep 15, 2014

One bad thing which has come out of my dieting habits from last year-ish is my inclination for "midnight snacking",newly refound.

I can type,drive and do well in this program.
I can type,drive and do well in this program.
I can type,drive and do well in this program.

I am literary when I am psychological and psychological when I am literary.

Something I don't readily like to give a positive write off to: when ppl are literary when they are religious and religious when their literary

From pg.29 & 30 of my HR txtbook
s(special) factors
____________________
specific components of intelligence that contribute to problem-solving ability.

...[p.30]

1. Verbal comprehension. The ability to understand the meaning of words and their relationships to each other and to comprehend written and spoken information.

2.Word fluency. The ability to use words quickly and easily,without an emphasise on verbal comprehension...


#2 I think matches more with how I operate. I can identify words quickly and the have an intuition-hunch guide for when and why they would be present. It'd interestingly tie into my ability to understand Spanish and is probably.. with the bilingual presence I've had around me..and the inherently grammatically lackluster ways my family speaks it is which kinda common in my social encounters imo..maybe that's why it's stuck to me more ?. #2 helps for vocab,ties into syntactical understanding which'll show for making poetry,esp.funky wordplay poetry.

#1 is something I might not be not as an inhenrently good at in spite of opinions."*and* their relationships to each other and to comprehend written and spoken information". All the inflection and connatation which others quickly get,which it takes me a bit a effort to click but which ultimately kicks my a--- in terms of being a efficient at performing. All the more highlighted when dealing with *spoken* info (my lack of being socially active factoring in here) and even more amplified when it comes to instructional information which might include any number of various kinds of information which evoke other kinds of special factors and multiple intelligence.

The "moment of truth" for

I can type,drive and do well in this program

is now.

Hmm..emphasise on "[i]moment[i](?) of truth"?,lest I entertain the elusive "truth",importance value?.

pg.35

value
____________
the importance a person attaches to something


there's another handy shorthand for an oft-confused one."

Sep 16, 2014

"Arrepentio comiedo un taquito de pollo que dejo mi hermano alli y que yo no se si lo quiera comer .

I can type,drive and do well in this program.
I can type,drive and do well in this program.
I can type,drive and do well in this program.

Let's say [that for "x" reasons I would not like to insert what it is nor is it important] I couldn't be Catholic [maybe it's not possible since it never emerged] what denomination would I pick?. Maybe Unitarian Universalist for a while "until I get my bearings" ,Lutheranism and ("High-Church"?) Anglicanism or any available Orthodox places. There was actually a small-ish unelaborate Greek Orthodox Church I think ,across the end of the street of the last elementary school I went too.

I feel that I might end up nagging about stuff and I'll have toruble sleeping again.

To have control of yourself...freedom...a false dichotomy to say it's different from love...akin to the false analogue of saying "desire=love"..(since) inverse of desire is hatred and the opposite of love is not hatred;it's exclusion...freedom has a lot to do with self-direction...hence how and why I think it's not "doing what you want to do" but "doing what ought to be done"...self direction:independence,freedom,liberty,autonomy etc.."one's freedom ends where another's begins" (factor in:how freedom is a kind of self-direction and it might key in more)...ex?: if I use my freedom to order a super-eleaborate cake(s) which (for some reason) 3 ppl died in the process of making,my freedom provides me an option which *should* or maybe even *ought to* not be acted upon or ceased (me eating super-fancy cake)..(b/c) out of love (of freedom?) ,I won't pick something which'll cause life-threatening struggle and suffering to others...they are not exclude to continue doing whatever freedom or autonomy (however seemingly limited ) they have...however if I continue to eat super-fancy cake and say I do it b/c I have the freedom to act on my desire or do whatever Idesire, "one person's freedom was crushed b/c of someone else's desire"<---a cynical outlook on freedom;produced b/c you did what you wanted to do instead of what *ought* to have been (let's call it freedom A:FA) done (not continue to eat super-fancy cake ppl die making)...there (in) freedom where you do whatever you desire (Freedom B:FB) ,you indulged in a luxury in spite of what harm it caused to others^1..this version (FB) gradually intertwines with individualism;however (I think,I conjuncture;dare I say) independence is not the same an individualism;individualism is not out of neccesity reliant or even the same as independence..(ex?)see addicts who say they are practising there independence by doing whatever they are hooked on but really an unhealthy dependance on the the sensations a/o outcomes of a desire occurs..when I was 16 I thought about how "money is freedom" and not happiness but now I reject that and say money is the fuel for choices^1 and hence the mobilization-capabilities and autonomy it can seem to lend one...unfavorably to one's self and others FB and not FA is taken to be the central unit of analysis by many saying "they are doing freedom" ... individualism involves "the right of the individual to freedom and self-realization" however the common notion of freedom is FB and self-realization is hampered when you and your self-direction V your sense of self-direction is/get(s) to be hooked onto desire.*

*somewhere in the midst of all this like a jigsaw puzzle piece like space where the social contract finds a place. I am brash enough to say that with say explanations,given enuff time and a kind of development it could hold it's own to systems like various conceptual frameworks of Marxism and I'd be glad to see it hold it's own to utilitarianism so underlying to so much politics and individualism too.

^1 and one reason for when adressing it's use I'd like to know me some "study of mathematical models of conflict and cooperation between intelligent rational decision-makers" (aka game theory)

(N=)...European thought....continental land of 89+ ethnic groups ...very individualistic groups with a long history of interpersonal tensions ...self-directions goes hand-in-hand with power in the culture.."power is.." question to fill in for another time perhaps .....strength,certainty,control..conflated w/the stimulation of/for thrill,excitement,novelty which comes w/conventional reception of power+ ambition needed to execute power for desired results in/of achievement and success?+w/accompanying delight,pleasure and luxury all the while?...=...sentiment of rebelliousness so common to European cultures

.. but not really present to most other cultures on the planet (imo) who's self-direction is more multiconditional on factors likes security,safety,protection,restraint,consideration,regard,respect,custom and (as a result getting packaged/compaction into) "tradition"(call it CT)...

the impulse of (N=) get amplified "to the max" with values and ideals from the Enlightenment era which also include concepts of universalism (ex.equality,unity,justice) integrated into notions of self-direction...a pillar for a lotta ideology,political or non-political philosophical...

..deadly error to say all other non-European cultures have no notion of freedom (b/c of a lack of notion of self-direction)..such thought is discriminatory and dampening to the well being of others when all your life your concept of freedom was (FB) in particular...hence a resulting mismove of "shoving FB down another culture's throat" which alienates other cultures from FA (ex.other cultures saying participatory forms of government like democracy are hooey and hypocritical and x autocracy is better since x autocracy=decked-out CT,ppl need)

FA+bioethics=manifests in animal and enviromental rights; this is where you (start?) seeing how Fb don't jive so much...complicated field in development...

doing FB instead of FA also comes into play w/gender issues and discriminations related issues on the whole-broad scale..
-----------------------------

Thinking about how much easier I go to sleep by showering and how I wish I'd be secure enough w/ the amount of time needed to shave. Slowness of toilet flushing lately bothers me .

I really wish I knew how to write action scenes for fiction...it'd be particulary cool to see how writing era-style specific anime-type action like the gunfighting from Trigun would be/look like on paper and the reception it would get."

Sep 16, 2014

"In my life I've learned what actually does happen when you "take away God" and are left with empitness;it's not scary nor does it mean the things so many stereotyped attributes of Western atheism think it does. I kind of like the idea of starting w/emptiness that is spiritual b/c from there a "garden" can be cultivated to my careful discretion and I can take it any way I'd like to take it after that.Culminatively and maybe incrementally.

As for politics?...I've realized that there's gotta be a way for me to understand it--a topic so many find distasteful to them like religion might be -- w/out becoming an ideologue or political spectrum fave-y. Understanding basic forms of *government*,power sources and power structures + (BIG+ here) how it intertwines with the development of law is super key and seems like a safe(r) way to go than diving right into the pool of so called ideology/ies and it's philosophical relations.

And another thing sidetrack;if you wanna keep things reduced in terms of the presence of motives keep organizational and internal cultures out of this understanding for as long as you can!. It’s the penultimate thing to be studied before actually setting foot on ideologies and philosophy. Until things are a-okay for a “entering x premise” may I suggest shooing away ideologies with deconstruction?.

Politics is the process and conduct of decision-making for groups. Although it is usually applied to governments, political behavior is also observed in corporations.


thank you wikipedia . Again seeing things like decision-makng makes me thinks that game theory would be SO supportive on this. A good grasp. With chaos theory's sociological application to keep everyone from calm when things might turn into a bickering-storm.

If (in general) anarchy can be equated to political emptiness ..or more specifically ego or (another kind of) individualist anarchy (?)

It might be a good starting point AFTER the fact-doing/deed of having gotten the understanding of government and law firmly streaming thru me to start there. As little increments of government presence and operation come to be I’ll get a feel for when I think the decentralization level is imo fine for functional.

Okay w/anarchy being the absence of government on another extreme I suppose is authoritianism^1

And moderation of government presence is supposedly democracy.

^1 though there’s a hunch in my mind saying there’s something else `_`…like mega-corporate subscription-control . Corporations are only as strong as you make them/feed them though,an often neglected factor….Chile?..under Pinochet?..”ex”?..minus overt authoritarianism?.

More than a few political fameworks,ideologies and politicians speak of freedom (not in the least via rhetorical flair) like it’s THE freedom;freedom like FA or a common conventional-notion like FB which I explained in a prior entry^2. Abstract freedom conflated with the freedom which can be provide in an ultimately (dare I say it : ) ) appealingly and satisfyingly flawed human innovation,innovation resulting from the behaviours of persons,innovation like politics. Hence I feel we gotta take commonly volleyballed terms of freedom and politics (FA and FB more or less meshed up into FR) and turn it (FR) into a d--- good definition;FL

^2 Now *this* I have a feeling is (somehow) rooted in one of the “big 3” of classical Anglospheric empiricism John Locke..a tangent for another time as is Thomas Hobbes giving the middle-finger to the social contract and other stuff that probably has to with government developments in the English parliament during the days of the English revolution (and maybe?) Oliver Cromewell…notice how I haven’t mentioned the French revolution and “Enlightenment” period this whole time (from which Auguste Comte made Positivism ,someone I don’t like, sprung up)

Now what about politics highest ideals,hhmmm?. Please turn away from the ebb-and-flow of conflict in economics and international relations for a while cuz that’s not’s substance nor is a good expression of it’s substance or ideals most of the time.

I sayyyyy..it’s *rights* not freedom which are the central “unit” of analysis,I’ll pick.

Freedom (FP & not FR)
(subsumes to)
||----------I-------------||
***Rights***

“Freedom is the right of all sentient beings” -Optimus Prime x > during the first Transformers movie

I’ll call this `_`..(FSR?,no)…the U factor ^u^ .

How do you actualize “the U factor”?. Perhaps significant waves of something on/for societal-collectives externally and internally.

Something that'll definitely catch on in both the public sphere and the private sphere of the personal life of ppl.Something w/ a motto about life flourishing ,something which I hope can wisely become friends with environmentalism and feminism.

Explaining and discerning this has always been a *major* problem in politics."

nope, nothing to see here folks on my blog,YouTube channel, etc

For those persons whom feel i would at some point actually sign up/join Facebook or Twitter, you're quite mistaken as, I hardly know anyone on either platform as well, I have no wish to engage in trivial matters as well, security & privacy on either platform is literally a joke.

The shops were busy today.

annoying people are awful.

Meow meow mew.

///////

https://www.coursera.org/course/intrologic

http://www.microsoftvirtualacademy.com/

http://academy.hubspot.com/

http://alison.com/

http://www.openculture.com/free_certificate_courses

https://www.edx.org/verified-certificate

https://www.google.ca/search?q=alison.c ... te+courses "

////

July 27, 2014

""Why are you so apathetic [..with everything?]",my brother said after asking me to try to feel for a muscle after he helped me with a weight lifting exercise. I'm kinda being (not a d---[/) but a joykill by not having behaved in a happy mood when he asked me to check a feel at the muscle I apparently worked out. Me being able to give a long spiel in response saying it's not really that I'm apathetic as much as I don't like/am not "turned happy" like most ppl are when they accomplish something (me in my mind justifying myself with how it's vain,conventional etc) [i]is not relevant.

What do I have offer as friend ?

no "fun" talents
no cool job
no eventful social life
no widely recognized high profile of acheivement
no job
no driving ability

nothing

What do I have offer as boyfriend ?

no "fun" talents
no cool job
no eventful social life
no widely recognized high profile of acheivement
no job
no driving ability
no "meaningful" social experience
no "fun" social experience
no Mike Channing Tatum style looks,body,style or charm

nothing
"

July 24, 2014

"http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panentheism#Christianity

In order to avoid confusion with pantheism some panentheists now use the doublet "unitheism"."

Jul 31, 2014

"In my backpack is the movie "Pompeii" which I'll bring for my mom to see. Having read the plot on wikipedia, I found out that there is a part when a woman's horse is put down by the (I think) protagonist--I found out about this site http://doesthedogdie.com/ which will tell you on whether a pet dies in a movie or not from this journal entry.

http://tompreston.deviantart.com/journa ... -471384131

and I agree with Tom Preston/Andrew Dobson on how

We have ethical programs and animal groups put in place to ensure that they aren’t harmed during the filming of a movie. And films are all abut make-believe.But that’s just it... movies are DESIGNED to make you feel something towards characters and situations. Their whole purpose is to manipulate you through visuals and sound to feel happy or sad or angry at whatever is going on the screen. Growing up around animals all my life, I’ve become very empathetic towards them and it pains me when I see and it pains me when I see animals in movies getting hurt, abused, or killed off simply for “the sake of the plot.

”Remember Independence Day? There was a scene where a family was running away from the alien’s fire wall and left their dog in the car. In the original cut, the dog died. Test audiences were so upset about this that the filmmakers went back and added a heroic scene of the dog jumping over cars and escaping.The thing is... animals don’t have our intelligence. Animals aren’t born vicious and malicious, they become that way due to external forces. Pit Bulls and Rottweilers are not vicious by nature, they’re vicious because we (humans) make them vicious. Dogs and other animals don’t have the higher level critical thinking to understand WHY something is happening to them. They operate pretty much on a purely emotional level. And that’s why it bothers me when animals are abused or hurt in movies. I’m empathetic enough that I can put myself in their situation. They’re innocent. They don’t know WHY they’re being hurt. All they know is that they ARE being hurt. And often times, there’s no real good reason TO hurt an animal in a movie.

And I know that I am not alone in this. There’s even a website out there called “Does the Dog Die?” doesthedogdie.com/ and the whole point of the site is to say YES or NO, without spoiling the movie, if an animal in the film is portrayed as being hurt or killed. I cannot stand when filmmakers resort to hurting an animal in films. It’s a cheap emotional crutch.

...I don’t care if it shows that the T-1000 is cold-hearted, there’s no need to kill the dog in Terminator 2


=========================
For some reason here at the library my Firfox browser loads better than this IE browser..

Lately have rewatched "A knight's tale" and having watched Braveheart,I'm a bit sick of seeing horses get injured in period movies.

In John Green's "world history 102" vid on medicine he has a point. History isn't only the story about human agency.It is also the story of non-humans (micro-organisms such as the ones which caused the big plague outbreak in Medieval Europe) and the whole biosphere. In their are also the stories of animals particularly the domesticated ones we know like horses and dogs, designated vermin like rats and even wild animals are beings you can throw into the mix ( micro-scale evolutionary biological history )."

Aug 02, 2014

"I could mention different thresholds but my brother has a point. I take away something by being apathetic. I diminish something by being apathetic. I take away the amount from the learning experience by being apathetic. I diminish he amount from the learning experience by being apathetic.

When an action which is bad happens/occurs there is a common tendency to look for objects which caused it <---looking at the objects which did it;looking at the positions of the objects which did it;evaluate how much agency or significance was factored into the action happening;it can be a person or another living thing or the presence of a mineral from a periodic table--could this be (being) object-oriented?.

When an action which is bad happens/occurs there is a valid weight in seeking the possibility of an action having happened,having been due to events <---looking at the events which did it;evaluate how much agency or significance was factored into the action happening; it could have the impact and aftermath of a certain course of movement,finite movement,finite range of movement done by objects;it can be the (effects of an) action of (an) object(s) or the presence of (a) phenomena(s) like weather of a certain kind ,change in a state of matter (ex.ice melting into water),an industrial or chemical process (ex.fermentation or frying),a social phenomena (ex.ppl getting up to dance and sing-along as a concert singer instruct--the co-ordinative execution of a team's strategy during a sport's match can count I suppose);could this be (being) event-oriented--an admittedly short-sighted statement I'd like to say:this sounds better;at least to try out for an particular segment of time?--the saying "hate the sin not the sinner"^1 comes to my mind as a time when it's preferable to evaluate an event's causes,significance and impact rather than an object's (a person's) agency and ascribing intentionality,possible motives and reasons and justifications for it.

When an action which is bad happens/occurs there can (be made to be) a habit of looking at the interactive summation of events and objects contributing to causation..even if this means ussually having/consistently working in the scope of a scale which is more limited than what you would prefer to see <---looking at the objects which did something within the context of a phenomena;looking at the positions of the objects which did it and the driving factors (like phenomenas;chemical processes,cellular procceses,mechanical processes etc) behind the apparent(ly)-occured movement and articulation;evaluate how much agency or significance was factored into the action happening with the knownable measure of capacity which could have been flushed out or pulled off with the finite courses of actions which could have been taken and there potencies; the presence(s) of (an) object(s) and of (a) phenomena(s) and there mutual interactions and contributions to one another not why it is there happening (ex.the common tendency to go for an acription of the motives or intentionality or agency of an object)..don't be so quick to go that question..not yet..imo,it seems to be one thing which is better left to arrive at around the end..ussually;could this be an event-object oriented combo (or a object-event oriented combo depending on which factors you are more keen to give precedence too.

^1 a "parallel-ish" concept which is object-oriented in a very tenuous sense.Think of it this way:if you are doing the object-oriented way,than your not doing it well--you have to do it better so that it is as minimally object-oriented as possible:I'm referring to the love I'm about to mention. "Love the sinner not the sin". You don't love ppl like you do material objects do you now ?.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Logical empiricism/positivism starting sinking down in the 60's

I now wanna put this here

By the late 1960s, the neopositivist movement had clearly run its course.[41] Interviewed in the late 1970s, A J Ayer supposed that "the most important" defect "was that nearly all of it was false".[42][43] Although logical positivism tends to be recalled as a pillar of scientism,[44] Carl Hempel was key in establishing the philosophy subdiscipline philosophy of science[13] where Thomas Kuhn and Karl Popper brought in the era postpositivism.[39] John Passmore found logical positivism to be "dead, or as dead as a philosophical movement ever becomes".[42]
Logical positivism's fall reopened debate over the metaphysical merit of scientific theory, whether it can offer knowledge of the world beyond human experience (scientific realism) versus whether it is but a human tool to predict human experience (instrumentalism).[45][46] Meanwhile, it became popular among philosophers to rehash the faults and failures of logical positivism without investigation of it.[47] Thereby, logical positivism has been generally misrepresented, sometimes severely.[48] Arguing for their own views, often framed versus logical positivism, many philosophers have reduced logical positivism to simplisms and stereotypes, especially the notion of logical positivism as a type of foundationalism.[48] In any event, the movement helped anchor analytic philosophy in the Anglosphere, and returned Britain to empiricism. Minus logical positivists, tremendously influential outside philosophy, especially in psychology and social sciences, intellectual life of the 20th century would be unrecognizable.[13]


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Logical_em ... Retrospect


An important .p.s. (unintentionally scatalogical-vulgar sounding like outcome there . "Object-oriented" can also be used as a synonynm for materialism or being materialistic,if it didn't already occur to ya.

Aug 04, 2014

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.
-Aristotle"

Aug 05, 2014

"There are people who meet other people and do “casual hook-ups” sleeping with them for a night. There are people who meet other people and do not want to do a “casual hook-up”,not wanting to feel used and taken for granted.

There are people who meet other people and “casually “ become friends with other people. There are people who have no want to meet other people and “casually” become their friends “for (a given/an) instance” not wanting to feel used and taken for granted. For example myself.

I am a creature of craving, of wanting, of impulse, of hatred, of desire, such a compulsion has been one thing which has been “solid” to my grasp throughout my lifetime. There are times when hatred can embedded itself in a person throughout there life as a characteristic resentment in spite of how charitable they can be to help others. Some good examples.

From the first “Ice age” movie,the cave drawings scene https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLZot5qjr2Q 0:55-3:05

Similarly in season 2,episode of “the legend of Aang” there is this part http://atla.avatarspirit.net/transcripts.php?num=203

“Cut back to the camp of Omashu citizens, then to a quick shot of Aang and the others around a campfire. Cut again to the baby wandering around after Momo and making cute noises. They arrive at Katara and Sokka, his water tribe club lying on the ground. The baby picks up the club and starts to suck on it. The screen expands as Sokka grabs it and holds it away.)

Sokka: No! Bad Fire Nation baby!

(The baby begins to cry. Katara looks over at her brother crossly, whacks him across the face and places her hands on her hips.)

Sokka: Oh...alright.

(The baby stops crying and begins to play with the club.)

Katara: (leaning over to hug the baby from behind) Ooo, you're so CUTE. Mmmmm...

(Cut to the Resistance Leader sitting on the other side of the camp fire.)

Resistance Leader: Sure he's cute now, but when he's older, (cut back to Sokka and Katara, still hugging the baby, he continues from o.c.) he'll join the Fire Nation army. You won't think he's so cute then. He'll be a killer.
Katara: (picking the baby up, who still clearly wants to play with the club) Does that look like the face of a killer to you?

(Cut to a brief shot of the Resistance Leader's grave face before cutting to a messenger hawk screaming across the moonlit night. Cut to the p.o.v. from a nearby rock that overseas the camp. The hawk lands on the rock.)”


The diviseness of scolding an infant for being a member of a group which has antagonized you and destroyed an important part of your life and loved ones..and the exemption that a someone can give that same infant seeing not only that they may not even grow up to do destructive things but by there presence allow are allowed an exemption,care and attention.

Years ago during the summer of ’07 I grew an obsession with regret trying to be like Rock Lee -~- from Naruto. I really regret having done so.

There is love by fusing with another and loving others. Finding someone to click with,expressing that love (there is an ideal-theory that the love which comes with being with someone and fusing with there reaches it’s maximum consummation and expression during sex) and perhaps having children we not are an extention of the love which came by fusing and more importantly are different beings by themselves. The other person,those other persons,they become the purpose.

There is love by dissolving into the world. Finding a cause which gives you purpose. Find a cause for which you can pour your being into. Finding a cause which you pour your being into which is diffused and disseminated into the world. A charitable cause. A cause of love. Altruism.

This is a more difficult route in the sense that taking into account outcomes is a delicate and complicated issue. No wonder some people end up thinking that the purpose of life is knowledge. It brings up some tantalizing points which are enough in my mind to make it a close second but even it yields to emptiness;perpetual liminality not exempt from value-judgements...no wonder the latter seems so far-fetched and mystical: “concrete” ordinary results like an established relationship, a life-partner and children are not open to debate to most. We all came to be on account on the actions of fusing-love^1..the ethics of cloning and reproductive technologies have points at odds with ppl b/c of that .Whereas (in) love-by dissolving has much less discernible resoluteness which makes engaging the definitions of it and making a case for it more much more difficult—one source of constant struggle,agitation and ridicule for those who follow it.

A cause of love in both love-by fusing and love-by dissolving is to support life.

There are inversions of this which can be spoken of [?:inverse of the latter is a self-indulgent millionaire||inverse of the former is a group with corrupt objectives?,ppl being passive-aggressive or abusive to one another?] and I can speak of them at another time.

^1 08/18/14 Edit:short-sighted thing to say: I know that there are ppl who came to be conceived on account of "casual hook-ups" or non-consensual interactions. I think it's better to say that the normative expectation is "we all came to be on account on the actions of fusing-love"."

Any acceptable, accomplished armadillo acts as an angry, admirable anteater. After all, any amount of ants are awfully annoying. Afterward, armadillos ask,"Are all ants annihilated?" And any alive ants awkwardly accept ambush, advancing away, as all ants acknowledge all amazing armadillos (and anteaters) are astoundingly assertive and adept at annihilation.

How to deal with bullies

Better Business Bureau.

"You are the dancing queen,
lettuce scream
ho-oly submarine"

In the late 20th century, about 40 percent of the world lived under Marxist-style governments.