In one word, how do you feel right now?

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It is related to wrong planet, action and words had to click, they didn't click, they finally clicked

I'll PM you the details if your into that which unless something else isn't clicking, I am assuming that is okay.

^^^of course that's ok

Indifferent.

Dolphin.

I don't know really... It's definitely unpleasant. Maybe shame.

Potato.

^So we're crying together tonight..

Probably, I can't tell if half the forum hates me or cries with me and now that I have removed any personal links to this username, I don't know that I care if, at least one person can relate to me.

I do feel I can relate to your shame.

It's "interessting" that you wonder if people here like you or not, and seen from the outside (me) I can't understand that, as I think everyone "loves" you. What is interesting about it, is that that is exactly what I'm struggelig with right now too. I come on here and read what everyone has written since I last was on, and get the feeling that everyone is so in sync if you know what I mean, and that I'm not as in sync as the others..

^ Would you like me to blow your mind with PM at how bad I am at communication?

I noticed something about the forums today and apparently people are agreeing

You are not the only one out of sync

^You can PM me if you want..

It's very important that you are warned though.. As you know I'm very isolated, and most of the people I have had contact with, either by text or in real life, I have ended up rejecting, if they haven't rejected me. What I mean by that is that I have sort of pulled away from them. Not because there is ANYTHING wrong with most or any of them, but because I can't handle it. It's to avoid the shame I guess. The last thing I would want is to become one more person you feel has rejected you, you know...

People don't reject me,

They hate me for legitimate reasons.

I don't expect anything from anyone here, less now then before. I am kind of disconnected to be honest, I really just want to publish a novel in the haven and then leave at this point

You can tell me the worse thoughts you have had about me and its really not going to do anymore harm

But back on topic

disconnected

Bleh....stupid roomates had a big fight the other night in which one told the other to move out, and well we can't really afford rent with 1 less room-mate. The one who moved out is the girlfriend of another room-mate and so they were sharing a room. Thus with her leaving we don't have a room to add another person if we keep our current room-mate but we can't afford rent with only 5 people.

So yeah had to kick them out and I guess the room-mate who left will come back and then we'll only have to find one other person, still kind of sh*tty.

I think that is very brave! Writing about things you feel is terrible about yourself, and I can't imagine it will be anything that changes peoples feelings about you. I do belive the best antidote to shame is to try and be yourself as much as possible, in sync or not Otherwise you will always have that thought " they wouldn't accept me if they really knew me". It's very hard though.. no doubt about it..

I don't usually say negative things directly to people, I just pull away instead.