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Double Retired
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28 Dec 2023, 11:23 am

Double Retired wrote:
Monday night there was a burglar on our roof. (Dressed in, of all things, some kind or red gym clothes!)

My bride is from Texas so it did not end well for the burglar. She shot him. He was apparently in pain after he fell to the ground—it sounded like he was muttering "Oh! Oh! Oh!"

He was dragging around a big sack with stuff he must've stolen from other homes. I shoved him in the sack and tied it closed to make sure he didn't escape before the police took him.

And to top it all off, now we have some weird deer wandering around our neighborhood.
OK. I'm just the husband. I have been corrected on this.

1. She did not think he was a burglar. She thought he was some perverted peeping-tom. She shot him because of that and that he kept calling her a "'ho".

2. She doesn't think they're deer. She says they're more like caribou except they're kind of tiny. She says they're really agile and when they jump it sometimes looks like they're flying. She shot at them anyway, without much success...though she may have grazed one on the nose.


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lostonearth35
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28 Dec 2023, 11:34 pm

Today I watched Puss In Boots. No, not the movie. I was watching the real Puss In Boots, because I'm a fairy princess.



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29 Dec 2023, 9:55 am

I practice the great art of stoicism every day. It's a great way for me to fit in. Because I'm so able to keep calm and carry on, you'll see a lot of me in PPR.


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29 Dec 2023, 11:52 am

Before I took up autism I was for many years an acrobat at a travelling circus. I was rather good at it but eventually I had to give it up due to osteoarthritis in my pelvis.


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Double Retired
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29 Dec 2023, 5:26 pm

I am getting tired of coughing.

I am looking forward to when it becomes sneezing which will be messier.


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30 Dec 2023, 7:16 pm

My music is really popular and I make a lot of money from it. But I don't really enjoy doing it.


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30 Dec 2023, 9:32 pm

My favourite month is coming up.


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02 Jan 2024, 6:32 pm

Bananas aren't real, man. The government wants you to think they're real, but they're not.



Double Retired
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02 Jan 2024, 7:37 pm

Earlier this evening I heard geese playing in the park behind our home.

They were lighting firecrackers and throwing them!

And, whenever they threw one they giggled and yelled "DUCK!"


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techstepgenr8tion
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02 Jan 2024, 8:50 pm

c'est un pipe.


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02 Jan 2024, 9:03 pm

I finally got enough to eat.


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02 Jan 2024, 10:48 pm

January tickles me pink.


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15 Jan 2024, 1:15 am

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21 Jan 2024, 6:14 pm

I am dead - again - after being eaten by robots, which is a thing that can happen.


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22 Jan 2024, 10:21 am

I want to get into bed with Jenny McCarthy.


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22 Jan 2024, 10:23 am

The staff at Autism Speaks are a bunch of tolerant and inclusive hippies. I love them to pieces.


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