What's on your mind right now?

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Tennis lesson today-hope the weather is nice and it doesn't rain.

I no longer give a damn about my country because they obsess over trivial s**t like tearing down monuments to a stupid war that happened over a century ago instead of focusing on REAL issues like expensive healthcare and high crime.


Seriously, f**k Amuuurica!

Oh and I no longer give a damn about being from the American South or being part Hawaiian either. I am me. That's all I can be.

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Trying not to get excited, too excited about the next times I would visit a cemetery or go to a Unitarian service.

The drudgery of looking for a cell phone awaits. The drudgery of looking for a job awaits.

How many assassination attempts is the universe plotting against me?.

I'd really like to be a marine biologist, I've realized... but that isn't going to work with my severe sensory issues with things like cold, the transition from dry to wet, and pressure changes.

I might like to be an actress - I love to "play" as different characters in my head, I just don't have the confidence to actually do it, in front of anyone. But even if I could get over that, it wouldn't work with my speech difficulties and trouble properly showing emotion with facial expressions.

So instead, I get stuck with part-time cleaning jobs, when I have any employment at all, because no other places will hire me

I do kind of wonder what my life would be like if I wasn't autistic. Would I be one of those things, or would I be a veterinarian like I'd originally intended? Or would my non-autism-related challenges leave me in much the same position I'm currently in?

I revised my New Year's resolution.

I'm going to read every book I purchased in 2018. I've gone back through my amazon account, online orders and real life bookshop receipts. I've read many of them, but not all. I will not and shall not buy any new books until these are finished. Repeat after self. I will not and shall not...

Alternate re-phrasing: How many attempts at methods to obstruct me from goals like moving out nigh-irreversibly while being functional intact is the universe plotting against me?.

If all the gods in the world are really one God, does he have dissociative identity disorder?

henotheism, pantheism, panentheism...such theologically related words might help but I find your projection of a neurological human experience curious and intriguing even to I whom has considered 'God' in a misotheistic perspective since toddler-hood and finds theism honestly anxiety inducing in it's compulsion for infinity in a not-uncommonly non-mind theory based way which usually winds up being expressed as another mere social mechanism.

I strongly want to write a 'my mis-eductation' chronology before job searching again.

I haven't done any of my New Year's resolutions...

I need a better schedule...

you can focus on ALL of that.

i got married in a Unitarian church.

good one!

Nope. I don't give a damn about any of it anymore. I'm so done now.

Indifference thy name is TW1ZTY!