What's on your mind right now?

Post Reply New Topic

Making sure I don't eat so much food.

My neice's birthday. She turned 1 years old!

_________________
♡◇ ♧♤

I really wish it wouldn't be so hot/humid so I could do some more weeding without getting sweaty. If I could at least get both sides of the front garden done, that would be great.

People have to act so fake on social media.

Reddit: be nice to them and suck up to them. Politics is evil.
Twitter: pretend to not need the co efficient. Act political about everything.

Real life is somewhere in between the two, at least my real life is. I'm finding myself censoring what I say where.

Going nowhere in "life"


Survival of the fittest


"Discrimination"

Hobbies

job

Goal


From Indeed, made appointments for two hiring events earlier this week

Did not bother going

Just went to a restaurant for a job interview


Stupidass job

Castle


Scheduled a job interview for tomorrow. Department store. Kind of far away. But not many jobs are close s**t


"Beggars can't be choosers"


Slouching


Discipline

Slacker

Lazy

Too far gone

Far be it from me, to magically metorphisizr into a skinny smart handsome cisgender neurotypical extrovert white man


f**k mister redelings


A couple of weeks ago, I was sitting on a bench at mall playing with the phone



Army recruiter asked if I was, in high school


Answered


He asked if I had high school diploma


Answered





He asked if I thought about joining army

Told him I am autistic

"You're autistic. Cool"


What the f**k is "cool"

Miscommunication


The solar system contains a lot of things much worse than autism but,,,,. f**k mister redelings, autism is not "cool"



Small vocabulary


s**t I wanna belong somewhere

Join military

All that stupidass BS

But MEPS disqualified

Autism depression anxiety obsessive compulsive disorder officially diagnosed


Over six months counseling

Menopause

blinkin' VA health care bureaucracy

I think autism would be cool if we didn't live in a system which values sameness and if my senses weren't so sensitive. I like being different.

KT67, did you always have female on your (I don't know what to call it.)?
I remember it male.

What's on mind is forgetting a friend who said, "I don't know."
I'm wanting help and getting it, slowly.
I want to die.
I hurt myself.
And, people who knew me in the past should not get in my personal business if they don't want to be friends anymore.
People are people.

Yes! I did all my food shopping before it started raining.

I was on the train earlier and thinking, "God, I *love* the sound of trains" and then the horn went off twice and it sounded amazing.

Physical and mental tension, and where it came from exactly.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

Got lost on the way to job interview

Interviewer asked me, why that store, and what do you know about shoes

Nothing

She looked disappointed

It's like, if I only applied to jobs I was good at or liked, that's zero

But short of government benefit or whatever, I have to slave labor somewhere s**t


Third testosterone shot today


Last night one hour toilet, fail

Slept great

Felt heavy but that is the new normal


Sooner or later will get fat

Metabolism slowing down

Eating more

Lazy

An AFROTC penis captain Dumont 2003, SDSU, had the nerve to tell me, that the ROTC does not take "undisciplined students" and I showed that I was "undisciplined" by taking six years to graduate


f**k you ass hole


You got a Criminal Justice bachelor from SDSU

And I tried and failed at structural engineering, UCSD

Autism, diagnosed 21

You can't measure discipline

Discipline is constantly fluctuating

Spectrum


Freedom of speech


But I hate compliments too


Judgmental


My stupidass "friend" went with her sister on Sunday.

Week before we went to coffeeshop

The week before she left right after aikido


Drama queen

Don't know if I even want her to be my friend anymore s**t



She keeps saying "what" instead of "excuse me"


She's bipolar


Dramatic


When Brandon announced he was moving to Texas last year, the stupid lil b***h acted like the end of the world



f**k you b***h


After expulsion, eviction, canned, dumped by precious lil "friends", homophobia whatever


It's like, perspective



s**t I want to join the military and


Belong somewhere

Purpose

Meaning

Team

Travel

Discipline





Enlist


But




Blanket party

Rape

Article fifteen

Fort Leavenworth

Demerit

Getting smoked

Sleep deprivation

Yelling

Easy to get sick, living with a bunch of recruits , stressed, dirty, barracks

Involuntary reclassification

Flunk fail MOS


Rape


Stop loss

Bread and water

Confined to quarters

Details, stand guard, scribe, quarterdeck, bureaucracy, red tape


You can't eat whatever you want

MRE constipation

The Crucible

Peer review


Demotion


Homophobia

Tired.
Goodnight.

Red Rose tea figurines
Headstands
Pyjama bag dolls
Lionel train sets
Klenny and the KISS kite
Scarlett Roses
Dirt Bikes, by London Bridge
Purple park benches with zebra print
Beet juice with pepper
The Mouse brigade
Gravy and yarn
Wooden sailboats
Beta fish
Drown

All Things Must Pass

mitsubishi mirage