Post something that made you UNHAPPY today.

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My friend's mother is in the stages of passing away today.

She's had dementia for years and I believe she's likely on the spectrum as well. Her last years have been so hard to watch -- constant hallucinations, paranoia, and flashbacks about trauma from 50 years ago.

I can imagine how hard that is.

She's unresponsive, so at least she's at peace in that regard.

It seems she has Covid but she's been deteriorating with a number of physical problems for a long time, on top of being senile and not recognising people. It's really sad. She hasn't known her son for the last few years. She still tries to attack her husband who has been dead since 2016, and they separated years before that.

She just passed away.

God bless her soul. She had such a hard life and I can relate to it so well.

I'm gutted.

I hope she finds peace wherever she goes.

May she rest in peace.

Some stupid b***h at work had the nerve to tell me that "I am going to report you". She acted all self righteous. 3:30pm. She pointed me out to Alicia and a security guard. Then I went to the litterbox and break, as usual. On the way, interacted with head cashiers meylin and Jim; and manager don. None of them said anything about the stupid b***h.

Paranoid of getting written up or made redundant. The boss might confront me about the stupid b***h today, but, the stupid b***h won't be at work.

Besides "at will" employer. They could fire me for any reason or no reason.

Dragon hugs for you and your friend. I sincerely hope she is now somewhere much better.

((((((((((IsabellaLinton))))))))))

Thanks dnd. I'm not sad that she passed, because I hope it ended her suffering. I just feel a lot of empathy because her life was so terribly traumatic, and I think she was autistic as well. She was almost 90 years old and still having PTSD flashbacks from the 1950s. She was like a mother-in-law to me for many years when I was dating her son but I didn't know her as well as I could have because she didn't speak much English. She was always very kind and loving to me. Somehow we had a bond without many words. I have quite a few gifts here that I received from her over the years.

She was very religious so I hope she's in a better place now.

Maybe you see a reflection of yourself in her. And it strikes at your own sense of mortality. (my take )
We often feel more for empathy those like us, than those un-like us. It's human nature.

I agree that I see myself in her. Big time. I worry that I'll be like that when I'm 90 -- alone, autistic, and haunted by trauma without a means to communicate. In her case it was a language barrier and in my case it's mutism. I'm not really worried about my mortality per se, but rather my time remaining and how that will feel.

She was the most senior autistic woman I ever met, and without support it didn't end well.

Yeah there is no easy path. It can get grim. Its poses an existential dilemma. How to live and act in the now, while we still have agency.
Death, basically throws this in our face, reminds us, to where we can't look away or hide from it like we normally do, in more carefree times.

Yes. I must admit these thoughts allowed me to have a semi-articulate verbal conversation with my mother. It was fairly brief and functional, but normally I can't even say hello.

Well, i guess your body must have good reasons to react that way. sounds like a subconscious thing. a ptsd thing.

I explored that possibility in trauma therapy, but it seems to be more autism related. My therapist and OT both think I'm just at the less-speaking end of the spectrum. I live so much in my head that it's hard to connect my thoughts to the physical pronunciation of words, and I have a lot of sensory issues just from hearing people talk. I greatly prefer to be quiet.

With my mother in particular though, there's definitely a lot of anxiety and trauma.

Yeah i am sensitive to sound. i prefer quiet, but noise tolerance is decent, if varying. (a passage from a schopenhaur book comes to mind.) I do hate noise, when i'm physical stressed/tired, i can react to it viscerally. I guess the key then is to be at ease, to relax. But then everybody nervous systems have different thresholds of tolerance, that are unique.