What's on your mind right now?

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^^ that could be the first line of a song...
If someone could continue it it would be great.. Am personally not creative enough...


On mind: bad dream.
Meltdown thing. Daily for maybe 2 weeks now today was the worst.. Impeded kids' lives .. Normally i can subdue it to get things done for them somewhat.. Today was a disaster.

Non-stop nonsense of head not working.

Better or change of Medication needed? People help? XH stop being so blah and help more? Brain fix? Get back to Therapist (quit betterhelp in fall or winter of 2019)?

cream

Jessica Simpson... read something she wrote about being abused as a child and she put it very succinctly and comprehehnsively and nicely..
i never followed her or watched films with her, but she was in the news and on tv a lot e.g. when i was at people's homes, it would be on...
and i always got good vibes from her. i really liked her compared to other celebs and felt it was overkill how much they spoke about celebs the way they do...like lindsay lohan they did the same thing to her...

anyway... there was a boy in my class, Ali R.,
who loved her, and he wrote poetry about her only (in creative writing class) and when we would have to read it out loud, any assignment of creative writing would be about her...
sometimes the teacher would challenge Ali to NOT write about Jessica Simpson in an assignment, and he would be like 'aw, now i don't know what to write.' it was funny.


now he's married...my brother is friends with him still but only on facebook now as everyone moved....

but yeah. i have a friend who was abused the same way as Jessica simpson was, as a kid, and she turned out great too. I just feel like parents can't do anything... what can they do.. it's horrific... i would want to die if that happened to my kids, either... that's my biggest fear...

Thinking about my failing memory, wondering if I'm going to end up in some sort of care facility because it's so bad at some point. But then again, that's entirely possible anyway because of my other issues.

Wondering how far I'd let it go before I reached the point where I really didn't want to live in that state.

I no longer care if my socks match.

I'm getting anxious because the days are noticeably longer now. Pretty soon there will be sunny evenings.

I'm really ready to be done coughing. Today's been the worst yet, in that regard. (I have bronchitis)

I hate living alone sometimes, there are helicopters, sirens & ambulances, the helicopters were saying ‘stay in your house’ Scary.

Almost had a neurotic attack yesterday before work, made worse because an other part of my mind started to fight back. And now worried I might have alienated someone.

It is nighttime.

I don't like my job performance the past few weeks. It just seems like I'm investing time on matters that I shouldn't be, and it's taking me away from things I need to focus on.