(this is lots of random stuff)
my body is constantly in pain, my heart, my lungs, my stomach, the sides of my stomach, my head, like im 14 why is my body constantly in pain?? well, i know why. and now around my heart is in pain. great.
and YESTERDAY i pulled a muscle in my neck and i was freaking out and crying about it because i literally don't get pains in my neck ever and i was worried it was something serious but it is healing kind of now and i feel better about it.
and someone who used to be my best friend is stealing my artstyle when i've constantly stated people are not allowed to do that ! ! i want to block her or tell a website moderator she is only 11 (site is 13+) so she stops bugging me, but she will find a way to crawl back into my life but i can't do that EITHER because she holds a roleplay i really like. there's literally no way out of this situation and i can't confront ehr because i feel stupid and that i'm being too nitpicky. and i don't want to snitch on her for a multitude of reasons. i'm so stuck right now and i have been for a few months. at first it was subtle but now it isn't. i HATE her. ______, im so upset with how you've become ://
and i have school today. and i'm getting more anxious by the second. i'm in year 10, i don't understand any of the gcse's i'm supposed to be taking and my grades are literally DROPPING SO BADLY i don't even go into school anymore barely i have to drop one gcse and i dont want to but i know i probably have to if i have to stay in this house for a little longer, not that i want to ( so much for that academic comeback i've been telling myself about for the past two years.
also im so close to relapsing JHSAJIDHFBDSJKA but i cant (well technically i can) because i have school tomorrow and i cant because they'll ask
also there are flies in my room and constantly swarming me i get traps on tuesday but i can't wait until then! they're annoying me lots right now
but i have a bit of nice news but i'll post that on the other thread. stuff isn't very good right now.
edit: oh, whoops, forgot to mention how i'm upset because everytime i scratch my skin it just flakes off because i keep putting off showering. like it's not that difficult i don't know why i don't just do it. well i can't right now becuase it's 12:31 AM but yeah. i'm really annoyed at myself about that.