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It's the only day when the sun exists.

How many keys does one need to unlock a locked lock?

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Three keys: 1. A physical key which is kept in the tower of London. 2. A retinal scan from Abraham Lincoln. 3. The pope's finger print.

Why do humans drink cow's milk?

The same reasons how a cow produces silk.

What does silica gel tastes like?

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Mine were wasabi-flavored.

Why do I see snow raising upwards instead of falling down?

You are currently doing yoga and standing on your head.

Where have all the satellite dishes gone that used to adorn people's houses?

They migrate to the south in the winter. By spring, they should be back.

Should I drink coffee or tea now?

If in doubt, try both in the same cup. It makes for an interesting drink. (I made this once by accident. )

Coke or Pepsi?

Crack.

Should I learn to smoke a pipe?

Yes, but first you must learn how to roll a cigar on your thighs.

What should I have for lunch?

But it isn't a pipe.



Edit: WAI, raw cabbage, it will improve your aroma.

Should I give up giving up?

No, you should give up giving up giving up giving up.

When should I clean my fish tank?

Only after a direct hit from a Russian missile.

Where is my pet hamster?

I used it in an experiment involving a microwave and lots of tin foil.

Why does the beaver oven breathe?

Beaver ovens breathe through their gills, because they heat up more efficiently when pretending to be fish.


What are headboards for?

For attaching the other end of the handcuffs.

What are breadbins for?

They force bread to become binary.

What is binary code?