Confession Thread

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According to what some people were saying on Reddit, I belong in a federal prison for the fact that I wash my jeans once a week. Or at all.

I confess that once I climbed onto the roof of my school, pulled a big sandstone block from the battlements, carried it over a slate roof without cracking any slates, dropped it into a rosebed from the roof, then carried it 1/2 km before abandoning it in a classmates yard.

I don't remember why, but I wasn't even drunk.

I confess that I feel more German than I do Canadian.

I confess that black, red and yellow are my favourite colours. Pea green and electric blue are a close second.

I often don't feel Canadian, either. But then again I often don't feel like like an Earthling, either.

Although the more I see how human Earthlings treat each other, the more I'd rather not be one.

The only real reason I'm not dead or in prison or the hospital is because of my mother and other close relatives. Like when we had a huge blizzard that buried half the apartment building I live in and my mother, aunt, uncle and cousin all came to dig up and clear away all the snow. I feel like I don't really deserve it.

This year, I only have around a total of 500USD equivalent amount of savings.
A large portion of that was either an untouched money since earning it from the pandemic or gifts. The rest is either my day job income or occasional allowance.

Most of my money received and earned is spent on junk food.
Not real food; but expensive candies and snacks that will not last few days because I cannot stop myself.
And I'm very sure it costs way more than trice the amount of my current savings; like consumed 75% of everything I spent. And I hate it...

Some are some monthly fancying; it could be crafting supplies, tools or gadgets that I may never use again after a while, or consumables that either never lasts a week longer or will never finish past it's expiration.
Fun at short term, annoying in hindsight. Maybe regretful, too.

There were no real investments other than a bike that I won't able to ride properly through half a year of humid seasons, some of my clothes and shoes that I do like to wear on a daily basis, a series of prescription eyeglasses throughout a decade, the very first phone that I currently own, and what's basically boils down to containers and boxes.

The rest are emergencies; most of it are medical -- dental sure does one but huge spending compared to occasional meds for illness.


I tend to avoid yet still spent on... Ugh... 'Social contribution'. Which is basically pandering on any relative some money in order to get a party or a get-together have some food only for that day or night.
Thankfully that only happens once or twice a year and not a lot.

And I really skimp over paying for transportation. But damnit, I hate most of this country regional climate.

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Both my cats are gone now, but I'm not entirely unhappy about it because I no longer have to haul big heavy bags of kitty litter up two flights of stairs every other week or less. Or clean out the litter box, and emptying a large box of soiled litter into the garbage and trying not to spill it on the floor, which I nearly always did. And then lugging the heavy garbage bag down the stairs and hoping it doesn't break open.

On Monday I was carrying my regular groceries up the steps to my apartment and I started losing my balance and nearly fell backwards. I told my mother I was probably a bit off balance because I'm just getting over an ear infection, but I know those stairs are going to kill me someday. People get killed and severely injured from stairs all the time.

But I still miss having kitties, especially when I watch videos of other people's cats on YouTube. If I ever do get another cat, I'm hoping for a kitten that I can train to use that type of kitty litter that's very light.

I want to have a cat in the house but...

... I don't think I'm ready to be a committed carer of any pet.


And I don't think I'd be a responsible pet owner at all. I don't have a lot of confidence over the idea of being responsible for caring and living with animals.

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I confess that I prefer Germany over Canada right now.

I confess that I tried Pot back in the wee small hours of New Years Day in 1996.

I felt very wrong using the Red Baron for an avatar. He's not a Sweet Pea. Schultz is a Sweet Pea.

When I go and stay at my boyfriend's house and I see a spider in his living I don't bring it to his attention because all hell would break loose because he's scared of them so I just think that what he doesn't know won't hurt him

I need to remove "Reading" as a list of my current habits.
Maybe to get rid of subvocalization habit, but never as a whole.


I should seriously stop -- it's affecting my energy levels, how I function...

I need days where I need less words.

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