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envy


What to wear to graduation?

Just about any outfit from the Blind Date thread.

What instrument should they typically include in orchestras that they don’t already?

waterboards

Have you read Dickens' lesser-known classic, Flaccid Times: A Victorian Guide to ED?

I keep it on my nightstand for when I’m in the mood for something literary.

Have you seen or read Shakespeare’s tragedy Twerking in Miami?

Mine is in a boxed set with The Merchant of Venus, edited by an all-woman league of magna cum laudes.

I thumb through it occasionally.


Do you snore?

Only when I’m awake.

What’s a good way to scare away vampires? The ones in my area seem to be unfazed by garlic.

Pop a bowl of Bran Flakes on your verandah. Vampires are terrified of high-fibre diets. For double protection choose a supermarket own-brand because vampires are also snobby. If you have a neighbourhood hedgehog you'll have to replenish the flakes regularly unless it's a vampire hedgehog.

What was the best movie released in 1999?

A random video of a prank, submitted to the movies competition as a prank, then it had been a great hit and it won awards.


Why did a 3 USD grocery brought wine won on a prestigious wines competition?

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

Because the judges were drunk.

Why doesn't anyone make cheese out of chocolate milk?

It's used in French Canadian poutine - Keeps the Habs full of energy.


What do you like most about me?

Your inability to wink.

How should i respectfully decline an invitation to dance?

Tell them you have a scorching case of Herpes. (Ferris Bueller)


Do you think Ferris Bueller and his sister were twins?
There are conspiracy theories.

Ferris Bueller and his sister are indeed twins. Both are part of the Illuminati and engage in unspeakable acts of violence at secret meetings held by Hollywood elites.

How many bottles of wine have you gotten through this year?

None. I keep pushing my head against them but can't get through the glass.

(Also in reality - none. I don't like wine. There's about 6 bottles here though.)



Would you rather date Lucy in the sky with or without her diamonds?

I'd like to swallow Lucy in the sky with diamonds and also some ecstasy whilst I am at it. Maybe throw a speedball in there.

What type of door handles are your favourite?

Door handles are against my religion.
They block the feng shui.

I can't believe you didn't know that.

What should I give Hester for her Got Day gift?