Jokes About Asperger's

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FTM
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02 Oct 2011, 9:38 am

"I'm afraid we don't serve faster than light neutrinos in here" said the barman.

A neutrino goes into a bar,

...................................................................................................................................
Not realy a joke about aspergers but I quess most aspies will like it.

Sylkat
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10 Oct 2011, 10:00 am

Dear VMSmith, I wish I could have gone to that school. I can only imagine how I would have felt about myself if I had been surrounded by others like me. Sylkat ( I know this is supposed to be jokes, but that video was like a peek into Heaven!)

hanyo
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10 Oct 2011, 11:20 am

jackmt
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14 Dec 2011, 3:57 am

An old man had written an autobiography that was to be made into a movie. He hired a woman to find well known actors to portay him at the various stages of his life. She went all over Hollywood telling actors about the man and his movie. She came back to him and said, "Great news! I got Keanu Reaves to play you as a young man, Michael Palin for your middle years, and Woody Allen for your old age." The man became enraged and fired her on the spot. Stunned, she asked why. "You've been going around town casting Aspergians on my character!"

jackmt
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14 Dec 2011, 4:09 am

If an Aspie speaks in the woods in springtime, and no one is there to hear him, would the trees leave?

2OT
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12 Jan 2012, 8:47 pm

Blindspot149 wrote:

Another Aspie joke thread. Saves the time finding and bumping one of the old ones :wink:

How many Aspies does it take to screw in a light bulb :?:

A1: Where

A2: How would they fit inside a light bulb :?:

A3: There was a loose light bulb in a toilet on an aircraft I flew on last week; it was a Boeing but even so...................

A4: Was that a question?

mdani01
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29 Apr 2012, 7:29 pm

sunnycat wrote:

Avian wrote:

An Aspie is standing in a room full of about two dozen NT's.

The NT's are all mulling about chatting, while the Aspie keeps to himself; mostly just staring downward.

Suddenly and inexplicably the NT's all spontaneously start hopping up and down while saying (in silly high-pitched voices) "Pancakes! Pancakes!".

The Aspie is confounded by this behavior; but being desperately lonely, and always wishing to be a part of things (contrary to common NT belief) thinks: "well, this doesn't appear difficult; even looks sort of fun."

So the Aspie joins in, hopping up and down saying "Pancakes! Pancakes!" in a silly voice.

At that instant: the NT's all suddenly stop, and all of their eyes immediately fall upon the Aspie (who immediately stops as well).

The NT's just stand there, staring at the Aspie as though the latter were insane.

Feeling awkward and embarrassed: the Aspie leaves the room.

I can totally relate to this situation...plus, like the Aspie in this joke I don't understand the pancakes joke either...what's it about?

I'm an aspie, and I don't get the "joke"! !!

mdani01
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29 Apr 2012, 7:33 pm

kreb1958 wrote:

How many Aspies does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to actually change the light bulb, another to record its make and serial number to his record, and a third who names the old bulb and adds it to his collection in neat rows!

Don't forget the fourth aspie, who researches the history of lightbulbs

Dhawal
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29 Apr 2012, 11:25 pm

mdani01 wrote:

sunnycat wrote:

I can totally relate to this situation...plus, like the Aspie in this joke I don't understand the pancakes joke either...what's it about?

I'm an aspie, and I don't get the "joke"! !!

It's not a joke really, more like commentary on NT behaviour. And it is spot on.

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SanityTheorist
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22 Sep 2012, 1:56 pm

A father walks into the room and asks his son, "will you take out the trash?"
The son says "when I gt bored with this."
His father asks "how long will that take?"

An NT would reply "5 minutes."
An aspergian would say "5 hours."

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22 Sep 2012, 1:57 pm

If you're aspie and you know it flap your hands
If you're aspie and you know it flap your hands
If you're aspie and you know it
And you really want to show it
If you're aspie and you know it flap your hands

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SanityTheorist
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22 Sep 2012, 2:16 pm

Ferdinand wrote:

I heard a joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he’s depressed. Says life is harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world. Doctor says, “Treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up.” Man bursts into tears. Says, “But doctor… I am autistic!” Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains.

That is a hilarious reference, I love this thread!

LonelyJar
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18 Aug 2014, 10:53 pm

HA-ha! You said @$$-burgers!

Ectryon
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19 Aug 2014, 1:12 am

Quote:

This isnt really a joke and tbh its killed my mood. Thanks. Anyway the idea is that the NT's are freezing the aspie out. There is no joke.... that's the point. The pancake chorus is just a way to get the aspie to feel completely alienated. He doesn't understand the point of the joke nor why his behaviour was apparently socially unacceptable. Oh good grief im depressed now. Why did I visit the joke thread again?

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Katherington
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24 Jan 2016, 7:27 pm

Raymond_Fawkes wrote:

MONKEY wrote:

This little kid said to me "You've got autism!"
I replied "That's a big word for someone who can't be more than 2,861 days old."

or 68,664 hours old ! hahaah

or 1483142400 seconds

Katherington
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24 Jan 2016, 7:35 pm

MONKEY wrote:

I wonder how many variations of the light bulb joke we can cram into this thread?

11 additions/variations to the lightbulb joke so far.

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