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touches the ImAnAspie wrongplanet button

[Pikachu from Pokemon and Terriermon from Digimon, for those who don't know.]

I would like to be able to go to a shopping centre or other public place and not feel as though I'm being swallowed up by mount doom.
I'd like to be able to speak to people without experiencing crippling anxiety to the point of going mute.
I'd like to not cry because I feel so overwhelmed all the damn time.
I'd like to not be terrified of people.
I would like to be able to socialise with people I like (and who like me) without zoning out and having a day's downtime afterwards to recover.
I'd like to be able to get close to people.
I'd like to not have shaky, weepy meltdowns.
I'd like to be able to take care of myself without going into a panic.
I'd like to not have people laugh at me and call me creepy or weird.

I'm sick of hearing the "just wired differently" analogy.
That makes no sense.
If someone rewires a computer so that the wires go into different sockets, are you going to tell me when it doesn't work properly, "it's ok, it's just wired differently. There's nothing actually wrong with it"???
No, you're going to fix the damn thing.

I've started my Christmas shopping.

Shopping for holidays and birthdays makes me anxious but I'm always glad I did it. It usually ends up working out better than I expected and if not, oh well, I know I shouldn't expect a perfect experience.

I will get on my Christmas shopping.... soon!

I'm having trouble sleeping. I hate getting hiccups at night!

^^ just my way of saying thanks for the last two pages...not sure if it came across like that

Have been a short trip to the apartment. I bought a cheap vacuum cleaner too, because there is dust EVERYWHERE! All the cleaning I did a few weeks back, well it's covered in dust now.. And my arm hurts a bit. Apart from this I'm doing well

I found a store that sells all different colors of jelly sandals! I managed to sleep too.

I have a theroy about the Pokemon anime:

You know how sometimes there are people with the same name? If you notice, in the newer seasons, Ash doesnt say his last name, but in the first season, his name was Ash Ketchum.

So my theroy is this: By some crazy coincidence, all of the boys who the anime follows, all have the same first name: Ash.

They all win the Leauges, but the media just tries to cover it up.

Does that make any sense?

Froya, awesome you are doing well and that the apartment project is going smoothly. What do you like best about it? Just something to do?

Midnightstar, your theory makes about as much sense as the Ash-never-grows-up theory, and Pokemon isn't exactly known for being sensible. Also, even as the Pokemon XY show ends, you've still got reruns and fan fiction and game plays.

XxZeromancerlovexx, jelly sandals and sleep, interesting combination LOL.

Thank you It's funny that you ask, as I reflected on that earlier today when I was thinking about Dcj and what might help him in his situation. Yes it might be as simple as it's something to do, instead of spending hours on the sofa every day. But I also think it matters that this is something I WANT to do. I get to learn new skills, and see that I for the most handle it pretty well. Maybe that I have to take the bus gives me some sort of social input too, looking at other people, saying hallo to the busdrivers.