Back story... I have been an assistant coach for a girls 6th,7th,8th grade floor hockey team for a few years now. I get the same girls every year with the addition of the new 6th graders. I know these girls, they know each other, they know me. The teams have never been co-ed. No one else ever volunteers to coach girls, so is has, since my kids have been at this school, the girls, my husband, and me.
This year, some guy who has a 6th grade boy, volunteered to coach floor hockey, which is suddenly co-ed, as the other schools we play do not have enough players to split the teams by gender. The man coached his son's 5th grade team with some other guy and they offered to coach. My husband and I are in school this year, and even though all of the girls on the team were mad we were not coaching, they know there is no all girls team but they have still been complaining to my daughters and the athletics coordinator for weeks now. The parents of these girls are also not happy that their daughters have to play against 8th grade boys. But the reality is that there is only one other school we can play this year and they only have ten kids on it, both boys and girls, so the district abolished single gender teams. All of their complaining will not fix this.
Teams were supposed to be situated last week at the latest. Monday I got a call from the coaches wife, at 1:30, asking if I could be the assistant coach to some guy I do not know and be up at the school at 3:30 to split teams as they had too many kids on their team. I was annoyed, but agreed as I would likely end up with some of 'my girls' and I know that would make them happy. I also know that if you have too many kids on a team, they do not get as much play time, and that is not so much fun for the kids. I have no car for the bulk of the week as my husband does work and he has classes at night, so I have to walk there... which is not a big deal as it is about a 30 minute walk for me. I did ask if I could have my daughters on my team as well as another child, who has lived with me before as I she and her sister who gets dropped off at practice, come back with me as their single mother works. She said this would be fine.
The teams were split in a way that I knew would upset some of the parents. I told this to the woman, but she insisted that we need to be flexible and it is more important for kids to stay with people close to their ages and whatnot. I know these kids, boys and girls, and I know their parents. She did not listen to me. We got our practice times figured, our teams figured. We have a coaches meeting tonight that only one of the two coaches needs to attend. The guy I was coaching with was able to attend, which was great for me as I have no car tonight and would have to walk up, in the dark, to a meeting full of people, sit for an hour, not retain any information, to have to walk home in the dark. I was glad I did not have to go.
Tuesday she calls me and complains about all of the calls she got from complaining parents... the same parents I told her would call and complain. She kept going on about kids being with their friends and only thinking of the grades the kids were in and forgetting that for years now the 7th and 8th graders have all been together. They do not want to be split... these kids have won championship games together and are very close... especially the girls. Then she starts in on practice times and wanting to know if I can take her husband's team on Friday so they can get scrimmage time even though her husband and his helper will not be there. Whatever.
Wednesday, the day I am supposed to have practice, she calls me to tell me she had more 7th graders join and now she wants to split the teams int one 6th, one 7th,. and one 8th grade team. Now my practice day is Thursday, I have to go to the coaches meeting, but due to the timing and the walk, I have to wait 45 minutes at the school before the meeting and walk home at night with my daughter who has to sit through this meeting with me. My other daughter and the girl who used to live with me are not on my team and now and neither of the girls are happy about this. I am going to have three kids at my house tonight alone until well after 8pm because it is too short of notice for me to find other arrangements... I tell her how I had to spend the better part of the day coordinating rides and such for Wednesday and that it is not easy for me to get kids to and from all of these practices and games and she started going on about how we have to be reasonable and how important it is for kids to stick with their friends in their grades as fun is what it is all about. I know a few 7th graders who will be sad that they cannot play with some 8th graders for their last year as their is no 9th grade floor hockey. Some of these kids will be heartbroken. She is not seeing any of this, but she is seeing how important it is for her child to be with kids he know. I just want to beat her until the candy comes out. I dislike being this annoyed with people.
I know sports in our school district is a chaotic mess. I have done this enough that I know it never runs smoothly, but even knowing this I feel put out, annoyed that I am not being listened to, and that even though I was not supposed to be doing this at all, I am and she is not appreciating the inconvenience she is causing me. Am I just being a jerk here or does it sound like I have a justifiable reason to be annoyed? I cannot tell. Part of me is mad that this new person thinks she can just come in and tell me how to do things when I know how it is done in jr. high better than she does and she just refuses to listen to me. I wonder if I am just being arrogant or something. I would appreciate thoughts on this as I do not know if she is being the unreasonable one or I am or if it is some combination of both. I need perspective...
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"...don't ask me why it's just the nature of my groove..."
04 Feb 2010, 11:20 am
