post your fave clean jokes!

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Like it says above, you can post your favorite jokes here as long as they're clean. Here's one to start:
A guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "If I give you something amazing, can I get a free drink?"
The bartender says "Let's see what you got."
The guy takes out a hamster and a tiny piano and the hamster begins playing.
The bartender says, "Wow that is amazing!"
A man sitting next to him says, "You got anything else?"
The man pulls out a frog and the frog starts singing.
The man sitting next to him says "I'll give you $10 for that frog."
The guy agrees and gets his $10.
The bartender says "Wait, I think you should have asked for more money."
The guy says "Nah, the hamster's also a ventriloquist."

I dont get it.

This was a church bulletin. Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be the soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on Its A Terrible Experience.

...and the director asked what the act was called and they said, "The Aristocrats!". Wait, you said clean. Damn.

Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld swaggers into the Oval office to give the President an update on the war in Iraq.

"Well, sir, sadly three Brazilian soldiers were killed in Baghdad today,"
Rumsfeld regretfully reported.

President Bush groaned and dropped his head into his hands and said, "Oh my goodness, that is horrible news."

Secretary Rumsfeld seemed a little surprised at the President's reaction.

"Mr. President, I know that this loss is tragic, but I've given you such
news before and to my recollection, you've never reacted in this manner,"
Rumsfeld declared. "Why are you taking this so hard, sir?"

Bush raised his head from his hands and asked, "How many is a Brazilian?"