The Official Stream Of Consciousness Thread

Post Reply New Topic

Ok..Maybe not official...But it sounded cool...

This is the thread where you can stream consciously... or vice versa...
Not sure if stuff here would fit in the Dishwasher thread or not... But eh, if it sucks it'll disappear yeah?

Anyone wanna start?


GA

So anyway today was w erid day for me my hot water stopped this morning after liek five minutes and I was all like, "cap, I hate my landlord" but it's still better than last week when I got lost in a mall which would have been cool if it was like that book "secrets of a shopping mall" where people froze as depertment store mennequins did you know that if female mannequins were real they wouldn't be able to get their periods because they're so underweight and did you know that in new guinea of the phillipines or somethine before they had american tv and media influence there were like no eating disorders and in a really short time after the media infiltrated them they developed them just as bad as in the us the media is really supremely evil like that now im depressed i need to go cheer myself up with a different thread someone pick up where i left off and make it be happy...

But if I concsiously make it happy isn't that a directed stream and redirected streams may technically not be streams of consciousnes but I say dam the stream, full speed ahead. Tho that might make it difficult for the salmon to get upstream and mate. Ah mating, now there is a happy thought both for the salmon and the bears that eat the extra salmon so they have energy to mate; wait- check that, mate, ship ahoy and that may checkmate out plans. So check out the material in the sails of the other ship - silk, like Yellow Mango, made from spiders web by million elves whistling while they work and one Whistler's Mother made a little extra cash on the side modeling for a painter so she could get a model plane for your grandson who didn't sniff the glue and grew and grew and brewed a drink that didn't stink and made him a Star. Bucks rolled in so he gave all the elves Christmas bonuses and 2 weeks off with pay. Day of Dudes was well attended because all the workers had time and money but noone really knew what the festival was because they had never attended it before so they went with the flow of the stream that roiled and frothed around rounded rock of this conscious celebration of the fun of being with all their mates and rolled late into the night.

Crowd behivaior has been studied a long time and one famous incident we talked about in class was this concert where people were all trampled and crushed because there was one tiny entrance to this concert seating concert and my professor said that he went to a concert like that and you'd get kind of pushed along with the crowd and just have to keep walking that would be Aspie hell in my opinion the loud noise the contact with other people that would be like someone's sensory nigtmare I'm sure and nightmares can be scaryy I used to have night terrors as a little kid then sleep paralysi but now I've gotten over both but a coiuple times a year I'll have some freaky dream and wake up all alone in my apartment and have to kind of sit with the lights on and hold the cat because nobody else is there and I feel all creeped out...

And I started gauging my stream of consciousness while I was reading the previous posts and started to get worried that I wouldn't be able to do it because I'd have to censor 90% of what came out of my head, like how I don't have nightmares because my brain has figured out how to break a nightmare and will ride out any situation even if sensation is shot to hell (gee how arrogant) and how I'm analyzing Serissa's posts for insight into her personality because she sounds like a walking contradiction at times (but what if that's offensive?), and how it felt to - (...) - and see already the stream of consciousness is more like a, hmm, what's a good metaphor, something to do with water and a broken squirt gun, and what was the point of all this, is it really worth hitting the submit button?

No it's not with hitting the submit button but I AM a walking contraditiona I'm a chick trapped in a defective female body who's masculine till you're hurt or upset then I go maternal but otherwise I'm a -censored- misogynistic -censored- and anyway yeah I make no sens ebacsue I'm a woman and women make no sense- see, a self-fulfilling prohpesy- but enough about me how about you? damnint my stream of consciousness proke on that one because I don't know a lot about you only that your avatar is in angelic rapture I wonder if the msuic in the backgrouns to that avatar should be hark the herald angels sing even if you're not in a religion that is affilkiated with angels one of the cutest things you might ever see is little kids dressed up as angels like they do at nativity plays or even haloween but nativity plays are just cuter to me because the kids all have stage fright or are totally obivious which sounds mean but damnit it's just plain cute...

Which reminds me of my grandson’s Christmas Program that I attended on Tuesday. It was comical and quite touching both at the same time. I abhor crowds and even in the small town my grandson lives in it looked as if the whole town (and then some) turned out for this Christmas Program. All of the children were dressed in their finest clothing which is nothing like many places with name brands galore and top of the line clothes. These were small town country children that have parents with very little money and yet they were still dressed so very nice with their little suits or some in a shirt and tie and the girls in their velvet dresses and pants and cute Christmas sweatshirts. One little girl had a tiny plastic tiara on her head. All of the children shouted their Christmas songs to the audience and the audience cheered for each song like it was the greatest thing they had ever heard. My grandson did very well and remembered all of the words and hand gestures to each song….up until he looked out into the crowd and saw us. He was instantly frozen in place and stayed that way until the end of his performance with the Kindergarten class. My dear sweet little Christmas Ice Sculpture. We cheered him on and told him what a great job he did afterwards. He smiled and looked down at his shoes and said, “Yes, I know” – I don’t believe he even remembered turning into a Christmas Statue or maybe it didn’t even happen. Perhaps time itself froze for one instant, just for me….so that I could stamp this wonderful memory into my heart forever.

I do love the Holidays but I believe that I’ll stay clear of crowds for the rest of the season.

Okay so im thinking about writing a story about a necromancer who is a student necromancer and is an up and coming student. He is the only intelligent necromancer and he lives in a society of other dark artists. He will live out my fantasies of competance in necromancy that i find the profession quite lacking. I mean look at abominations from world of warcraft. I could make such a better model of shock troop with like an afternoon of planning and revising. So i want to write stories where incredible attrocities of man are the reasonable option in a convoluted universe and history i devise. Like perhaps it was not terribly reasonable to 6 million jews at the time and situation hitler decided to do it, but here is a world and current modern existance where it is among the real reasonable courses of action. I plan to do this for many other attrocities of man which most people believe represent the inexplicable evil that exists in the universe.
I have this really big thing about competance. If you are going to do something do it right. I wish that any great power would just pick me up, give me all the resources i needed, and gave me a purpose, because i have no strong desire of my own. I know there are people who lived poor childhoods who are given purpose because of that, but i feel i have no real purpose. I crave to do nothing strongly. I wish someone whose opinions i valued had some stupid cause that i could fight for competantly. I know i could further any science that i wished, and influence the events of the world signifigantly if i wished, and im sure i could do a little bit of column A, B, and C in my lifetime, but not a huge amount in all at once, i am not unrealistic in my understanding of my own capabilities in my opinion which i know could be wrong. I try to be outwardly humble. I try never to be arrogant, it is only in the private room of my mind where i kind of know as a given, such a given that it goes without saying, that i am capable of doing pretty much anything i want very well. But i would never tell someone that i know i could do X better than them. Because i don't know i could, i assume, and project to others than i will always assume others are greater than i. And probably i never will get some cause which i will have any reason to dedicate my life to, and therefore it will never come to pass that my accomplishments show that i am somehow superior to other people.

<my stream of thought just became total silence, so i'll start again from another point i wanna make>

I try as hard as i can to be humble. This post is a rare moment when i will actually tell you how i really think and feel since i think that is important in true stream of consciousness. And it will give insight to how my mind actually works. In life i always behave humbly. There is some part of me that knows that in some respects i am very superior to others in at least one sense, but i don't really garner any kind of narssissistic pride from that or anything. It is so obvious to me that it goes without saying. During my life so many of the things which require preformance on my part were so easy it was boring. I am not competitive an iota, i am interested in expending the least effort possible. I havent actually tried to accomplish anything academically since 2nd grade. I passed, easily, but i haven't been doing as good as i possibly could since 2nd grade, and i haven't been preforming at more than 30% capacity for the rest of my life. But when it comes to actual living and interacting with people i always behave humbly. It pains me slightly the irony that the only real pride i have is how humbly i behave in day to day socialization with people. I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt, and i try never to brag or boast. It pains me slightly that that is somewhat what i am doing now. I try never to be arrogant. I try always to be as understanding as possible and unpretentious as possible. I try to be as considerate of the other party as possible. I am constantly second guessing everything i do in order to continue improving upon my own humility. Because i know that as hard as i try i am not humble enough. My behavior can always be improved upon. I secondguess my self to continue appreciating that i am not the smartest person alive, infact, i try to spend my time appreciating how unwise i am, and how ignorent i am. I hope, i feel that my appreciating my faults and trying to improve upon them that the world, and myself will forgive my failures.

<Break in thought>

Nothing else is whining in my mind to be expressed so for now i think i am done.

My husband keeps watching murder shows on TV and it's driving me crazy because overhearing hours of murder stories each night gives me nightmares and causes me to despair in all humanity. Why are people fascinated by murder shows? Why are they so popular? Why is so much TV programming about killing? I can't stand that! Why is this stuff turned into entertainment?

Someone's going to kill me for reviving such an old thread and why aren't you supposed to do that? No idea but I think there's some kind of hidden rule about that in forums but I'm not sure where I picked that up but I do love stream of consciousness you know like James Joyce and Virginia Woolf and why aren't there more writers like that? It's a really cool way of writing and I've been meaning to pick up Ulysses but I've been reading boring stuff for school Shakespeare and Federico García Lorca and I wonder if I'll fail Literature it's getting harder I flunked out the last test (6, I pass with a 7) but I ended up with a 7 on the report card luckily because on the other test I had an 8 anyway like 70% of the class is failing someone made the statistics anyway wish I could have an 8 or 9 again no one of course ever gets a 10 it's kind of impossible for some reason.

My Laptop is humming in the background, as I think of a good way to mix chores, hobbies and relaxation. I am looking at my Screen and my thoughts are racing through my Mind. I find it hard to believe that my Little Sister had already gotten Married, last Saturday. That was almost a week ago. I also have a hard time figuring out why I'm still feeling lonesome, if my Company had left, four days ago. I only usually feel lonely for two days, and than I'm fine, again. Now I've just glanced at my Routemasters and that has broken my Stream of Eternal Groovy Consciousness. I'll try again, tomorrow.

Quack, quack, quack said the duck as the duck drove a truck that ran into a buck that fell into the muck but I don't...
wood in the trees and the smoke from the fires on the light summer breeze settles ash spinning ash burns your lungs

mind, mind, what's on my mind. We think all so many things at once that it'd be impossible for a true stream of consciousness ah I forgot how to spell that and had to check where was I? oh yeah it's hard enough to type all my thoughts fast enough following only one thread of thoughts wow what id we did a three dimensional model of the mind with all the thoughts overlapping os you can see that while you're thinking I'm bored you're thinking that you'll have to go tdo that English project eventually think I'll go do that.

Ow! I'm think I'm getting a migrain. I've been looking at this computer screen for too long maybe I should spend less time on the computer and more time outdoors or something but there's nothing to do outside someone stole the front wheel off my bike so no bike riding and public transportation here sucks so going anywhere by bus will take forever. God, I hate this boring town I wish I could've stayed in New York at least they have plenty to do but they're cost of living is ridiculous and just getting a shoe box apartment costs an arm, a leg, your first-born and whatever. Then the job market is worse than here(can you imagine?) so here I am, stuck in the house with nothing to do.

I am watching a Magnetic Globe spin around and around and around. I think back to my College days and I decide that those days weren't so bad, after all. It was something new. My course could have been a bit more challenging, but I've met a lot of interesting characters that I wouldn't have met, otherwise. I was a Flower Child, during my first month of College. There were no London Buses going through my Mind. Only Mind Trips that I've made up, in my Mind, as I was falling asleep, during the two years leading to my College Experience. I did a much better job, than I did, last night.