[Proto-Diagnoses] Make Up a New Disorder (or two) Per Post

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Random-Discussion Section. Absolutely Do Not Take This Thread Seriously. We're Just Joking.

⇒　Social-Masturbation Disorder
⇒　Forum-Addiction Disorder

I like those. Here's more:
Opening night moviegoer compulsive disorder
temporary amnesia of responsibilities syndrome
excuse overuse disorder
excessive multitasking disorder

Vehicular Aggression Syndrome. It leads to road rage

From DSM 449

CDO

OCD alphabetized
Rule out if compulsive cleaning and a neat kitchen table are present.

Songism -
Present at least 6 months
At least 3 of the following notes by clinician
Singing prior to talking noted by historian
Tendency to use song titles as answers to queries.
Tendency to think of song parodies during serious conversations.
Waking spouse to share songs in the middle if the night.
Dancing with spouse after hearing their song in stores or elevators.

Procrasturbation personality disorder
Relgionecrotizing encephalitis

Recto-Cranial Fistula.

A pervasive disturbance in the natural development of the body, wherein a direct connection occurs between the brain and the anus. Symptoms include racist, sexist, and generally bigoted attitudes, a sh***y attitude about life in general, and a tendency to end one's life in blatantly stupid activities (a.k.a., the "Hold my beer and watch me do this" syndrome).

DCO - the complete opposite of OCD, where the victim has severe difficulty performing even the most simple of repetitive tasks. They may only wash their hands once a day, never check to see if their socks match, or not even bother going back home if they think they forgot to lock their door.

Bipolar Bear Disorder - The victim become unusually obsessed with snow and cold weather and dresses in white to blend in with their environment. Other symptoms include sleeping in refrigerator, cravings for raw seafood, and severe mood swings where one minute they are rearing up on hind legs and roaring, and the next minute they want to give everyone around them a bear hug.

This one might actually exist by another name : Manipulative/Two-Faced Liar Syndrome

DCO

That has a ring (only one) to it.

Chronic Failure Syndrome

Pokemongoloid syndrome. The afflicted person plays Pokemon Go every minute and may only mate with people they meet at pokestops.

Beer Pongophilia--The love and glorification of Beer Pongs

Reversed Earth Syndrome

The images we see are made up of light reflected from the objects we look at. This light enters the eye through the cornea. Because this part of the eye is curved, it bends the light, creating an upside down image on the retina (this is eventually put the right way up by the brain). If a person has Reversed Earth Syndrome, the person's brain can't send signals to their eyes to flip images, so this means that they see everything upside down.

To them, the floor is the ceiling and the ceiling is the floor. To make their lives easier, they have their ceilings built with plenty of reinforcement so that their furniture can be attached to it. Gravity would cause everything to fall down, so seatbelts and extremely strong magnets must be used to keep everything in place. Their upside down rooms can be reached with stairs or a ladder. These people typically walk on their hands, and it is not uncommon for them to have surgery in which the hands and feet swap places so they can use their feet to walk with and use their hands for everything hands are normally used for. It is believed that a pair of image reversal glasses will one day be able to help these people to live life like the average person.

I'll think of more.

CDS--Clinton Derangement Syndrome
TDS--Trump Derangement Syndrome
JDS--Gary Johnson Derangement Syndrome
SDS--Jill Stein Derangement Syndrome.

Chlamydaherpasyphilaids - The diagnosis of having every STD after sleeping around with everyone and anyone.