I dont know how to educate people about my behavior
I am autistic and it causes me to act weird according to people.
I stim a lot. I flap my hands, rock, spin, wave my hands, chew and swing my legs. I also really like to make clicking sounds with my tongue and I like to press buttons. This has led to people asking me what I am doing or telling me to stop. For example some lady walked up to me while I was chewing on a necklace and said "Get that out of your mouth young man". That was awkward and I didnt like it. Then I was flapping my hands and my cousin grabbed my hands.
Not many people understand this but I cannot deal with touch. I only like it when I am in meltdown mode and its comforting. I hate tickling, having my hair rubbed and being grabbed suddenly. My younger family members dont understand. I cried once because of tickling. I dont deal well with hugs either.
I really feel uncomfortable with eye contact. I did have a friend who pestered me about it and it caused me to feel very uncomfortable around them.
Another thing that people really dont understand is that showers and baths are not peaceful sensory experiences for me. I hate the sensation of being wet. I hate water dripping onto me. The sound is really bad too. I have gotten upset during showers.
Also sometimes people think I am too old to act like that and they call me childish. That hurts my feelings. I am trying my best to be a good 18 year old. It is kind of hard. My therapist says my social skills are a bit behind my age and that I am less mature than 18. I dont like that
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Dont try to be someone you are not. Respect the Stim
goldfish21
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Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
It's said that we have an emotional maturity of 2/3rds our chronological age. So, at 18, it's your nature to act like a 12 year old.
For myself, at 35, it's my nature to act like a ~22 year old. Personally, I don't mind this at all, as I relate to my 20 something friends much better - however - I have many friends at the beach that are in their 40's, 50's & older, too. Very few friends exactly my age-ish, as I don't really tend to get along with very many of them at all since they're all doing VERY different things with their time & lives than I am and we don't really have common interests. I'm gay & like to go to the beach and outside to do things, they're married with young children etc. Plus for most of my life I've been WAY behind them in terms of career/finances etc so don't really like being around people my age who were always so much further ahead in so many different ways. Easy solution is to just surround myself with both younger and older friends instead.
It's probably a lot more stressful for you right now having the emotional maturity of a ~12 year old when your 18 year old peers are maturing into adults.. but in another 10 years or so when they're starting to get boring, you'll be just entering your prime and then have a lot more fun into adulthood than they ever will! This is definitely one of those "Good things come to those who wait," situations. Wait and see.. it gets better.
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goldfish21
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Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
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