Pet issues. Please help!

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I am awful at communication so please bear with me here. I have diagnosed ASD and my wife is NT. I have always loved animals and I like them more than most human beings. I have always had pets and had no problem living with them and training them. My wife and I got a rottweiler puppy about 8 months ago and she is 1 year old now. She is a decent dog, but I absolutely hate her. Please let me explain myself before jumping to the conclusion that I am an awful person. My ASD causes me to have extreme sensory sensitivities. The biggest issue for me is sounds, but I am also extremely bothered by being touched, layed on, or breathed on. This dog has absolutely no respect for personal space. She steps on me, breathes all over me, bites to initiate play, licks, and barks CONSTANTLY. She also sheds very badly, chews my things, and digs a million holes in my yard. I am very particular about my things, so this enrages me. I have worked very hard in my life to become relatively successful. I have recently bought my home, and this dog is destroying it. My home is supposed to be my safe place, but it has gotten to the point that I would rather be at work. We do not have the money for training classes. My wife thinks I am insensitive because I make it very obvious that I detest this dog. I would never hurt the dog or anything, but I wish we had never gotten her. I feel so badly for hating her, but it's passed the point of trying to like her. Has anyone else had experience with this? What can I do to fix this problem? Any advice is greatly appriciated.

I appreciate the fact that you like animals. I also understand that you're on the spectrum. (I am too.)

I don't think you should feel badly about not liking your dog. Animals have personalities just like people do and sometimes individual animals are not a good match with certain people.

If you've always had pets, surely you've always had them touch you, lay on you, breath on you etc. Surely your other pets have shed.

How have you dealt with this in the past?

Regarding the biting to initiate play, that's not acceptable, but your dog could be trained not to do this.

Barking is a bit more problematic. Would you be willing to try an obedience school?

If worse comes to worse and you are just not happy with your dog, you should try and take her back to wherever it was you got her from. If that won't work, you could always advertise her on Craig's List. You could also look for a no-kiill shelter.

Why did you choose a Rottweiler? The breed is well known for being boisterous, independent and stubborn.

Are you doing any training at all? It will need you to be fairly assertive. As it gets older the dog is less receptive to training.

You need to agree with your wife on how to deal with, and stick to it, otherwise the situation will just get worse for all of you as time goes on.

I think it would be best to consider finding a new home for the dog with someone who does appreciate this type of dog.
You can then find a different type of dog or different pet that is more suitable.

Yes, I can understand how you feel. I have lived in a household with large dogs, and much as I love animals, and even enjoyed taking them out for walks, having them in my living space was just too much for me. I was fortunate that they were both working breeds, and so at least happy to be kennelled in the yard some of the time.

I think that the most compassionate thing you can do is to do your level best to ensure that you find a good alternative home for her. There are potential owners out there who would love a really interactive, "touch-feely" kind of dog, and might relish giving her the kind of attention that you're not able to.

At the same time, you probably need to find a way to help your wife to understand just how overwhelming you are finding dog ownership. You need to explain that you don't "detest" the dog - you detest the anxiety and sensory consequences of owning a dog. I would admit to her that you realise that directing your frustration at the dog is misplaced, but also that until the pair of you reach an understanding and act upon it, your frustration will likely continue, and in a spur of the moment outburst, it's only natural to direct it at the most immediate target.

Thank you all for the replies. I have had dogs as pets in the past, but they were always small dogs. They had barely shed at all, and were much easier to control as far as laying on me and stepping on me goes. I chose a Rottweiler because it is the dog my wife had always wanted. I knew I might have issues with it, but I feel so badly that my NT wife has to deal with me needing so much space to myself. I don't like physical affection, and this bothers her. So i chose to get her this companion animal and she absolutely loves it. I work 40+ hours a week, so she is the person who is with her most. I think the person who said I detest the sensory issue and not the dog is correct. I just need to find a way to keep the dog away from me while my wife can still have her around.

But you can have dog free areas in your house, again this will need training and will become more difficult as the dog gets older.

On Youtube "Training Rottweiler" scores 268,000 results.

I still think you need to sit down and discuss the problem with your wife to find the best solution that works for all of you, including the dog.

Put essential oils like peppermint on your shoes or what the dog chews on.Get a spray bottle with water and spray the pup in the face with it when it bothers you.