Rudeness in Indian restaurants?

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Where I live in England I notice when going out to Indian restaurants with my parents the staff/waiters are rude towards me but very polite to my parents.

Has anyone else had a similar experience when dining out with family at Asian restaurants?

I dunno it could be because I am autistic or because of the ‘pecking order’ in foreign cultures?

I'm in the US (Kansas, to be specific) and the staff at the Indian restaurant we go to are usually friendly - they know us by now since we've been going there for quite a while. I don't recall ever having any of them be rude to me, even when I couldn't speak loudly/clearly enough to be understood and had to point at the menu to indicate what I wanted.

The only time I've ever seen a server in any restaurant behave rudely toward a customer is when the customer was also behaving rudely and/or indecisively.  Best to smile, speak clearly, mind your manners, and know what you want to order before the server arrives at your table.

In normal times Mrs V and I often go out for a curry.

Cant say that I have experienced any significant rudeness.

lol in that case maybe i am the one being rude then?

Or just unlucky - all the rude restaurant staff having moved to your area!

I've been to an Indian restaurant where the staff were inconsiderate (watching cricket and being lazy) and I've been to Indian restaurants where the service was great. In India I've encountered quite a lot of rudeness but it's always been fine to be rude right back!

In my life I have met 2 Canadian people who were incredibly rude and obnoxious. There probably not all like that though.

I haven't been to many Indian restaurants but they seemed just as polite as any other one I've been to.

I heard the other day that in India they think showing up for something ON TIME is rude! If you're going somewhere like a party or a meal, you're supposed to show up late. As someone who cannot stand this kind of thing I'd go out of my mind. When people tell me they're coming over "soon" or "later" their vagueness makes me edgy, so if they're always late on purpose because they *think* that's the polite way to do it...

There is really no one right or one wrong way to do most things. It's because of the culture that people think there's only one right way to do something, which I find both fascinating and terrifying.

Interesting, I wasn't aware of that

What a bizarre convention - it really makes no sense without some sort of formula such as adding on 10 minutes to whatever time is stated. In which case why not make the time 10 minutes later and then you wouldnt have to add anything on. Though, people would then think they were rude for being on time.

It kind of reminds me of the discussion on amplifier volumes going up to 11 in Spinal Tap

I've probably not been to a real restaurant (with waiters) more than about 20 times in my life, but I've definitely experienced a strange, hostile sort of attitude towards me on a couple of occasions, which had no obvious cause or explanation.

In one instance it came from a young Estonian waitress in a pretty cheap place in Central London, and the other time it was from a waiter in an Amsterdam restaurant, who seemed very cold and abrupt when I asked him for another coffee. On neither occasion did the people concerned actually say anything, and all I can think is that I just want to be left alone if I'm in one of these places, and don't really want to strike up any sort of 'rapport' with anyone.

I tend to regard the whole idea of 'service' in a restaurant as a bit ridiculous and unnecessary, and a potential source of considerable friction. That's why the only eatery I've patronized for at least the last 15 years has been McDonald's. Ordering one's food at the counter, taking it back to a table, and being allowed to eat it in peace is fine by me. Slightly worryingly, one or two McDonald's branches in the UK have started to introduce 'table service' recently, though it's not compulsory, thank goodness.

that's actually 100% true in South Asia, my mom had to explain it to me my dad insisted on being early everywhere and she was saying people actually don't like it because they're preparing still....
i said the same as you, why not make it later??!?!?
she said it's just a type of unwritten etiquette that makes no sense.

i visited an Indian restaurant in a village there once and noticed the 'young'uns' (teens to twenties, i guess) being excessively rude n rowdy towards the waiters
i thought it was weird that they called it an indian restaurant as the waiters all were Bengali...
anyway that time i saw them being rude etc. but we guessed they were drunk as the waiters seemed not to mind

so my cousins were there too (2nd cousins) as they live there (we were visiting) and then they left before us. so we were standing outside, waiting for a cab, and then i heard a loud young man's voice behind me 'HEY PAKIS!'

i was assuming it was the same young men i saw being mean inside to the waiters,
so i decided the best response would be something unexpected,
and turned around and blew a big kiss with a smile. (i wanted to do something wacky to catch them off guard).
then i said OH NO! because it was my second cousins in a car who had said that, as a joke, and they couldnt stop making fun of me after that.

esp as i seemed very quiet and proper before.

What is going out to a restaurant? I seem to have a vauge recollection.

I don't interact with the waiter. Someone orders and intercedes for me while I am absorbed in my phone. Probably posting to WP.

I haven't noticed such a thing, not that I've been to many Indian restaurants in the first place. Once when we went to one in Poland, my sister complained afterwards that the waitress didn't smile, but that was our second time in that particular restaurant, so I think we may not have left as much tip as they expected after the first time and were unhappy about that. That or we could have broken some other Polish rule without noticing it.

I never been to an Indian restaurant but I eat out a bit & I've noticed waiters/servers being inconsiderate sometimes. The service at some restaurants is worse than others & things can still vary a lot by the place. I don't go to foreign places thou so I don't know if there's any cultural differences with them. My 1st job was a dishwasher at IHOP & a couple of the servers were rude to the customers sometimes. I'm not sure why they would be nicer to your parents instead of you James. If you go there with your parents a lot & they pay it might be cuz of that but it could be lots of things otherwise.