IsabellaLinton wrote:
.... A desire to be awake when it's dark.
I get my second wind when the sun goes down. I'd rather sleep during daylight.
I was def like this when I lived with my parents. Part of the reason why was so we could avoid each other more. My mom was very stressed out working in in a job that was nice at 1st but had rapidly gone downhill the longer she was there. I'm disabled & I have worked some but the best jobs I could do were minimum wage type stuff & I was very lucky to even get those jobs. I almost never heard back after submitting job apps. My mom resented me for not working cuz she can NOT relate to being disabled & there's a huge generational gap from when she was looking for work after graduating high-school & me looking for work after I graduated high-school. She felt I was lazy & blamed me for her not being able to retire from a job she disliked & hated at times towards the end. I was NOT happy with the situation but my best efforts to try & improve & make progress were NOT working. I was just running in place & did not have any supports & services willing & able to help me with things. It was better for me to be up at night so I could avoid mom more. When she did see me she complained about me being a recluse & blamed my routine sleep & wake schedule for me not having a job which had nothing to do with the reasons I was not working. Yes the job I had the longest involved me working overnight but working overnight was NOT the reason why I took that job. The other two jobs I had involved me working in the day time & that was fine too. Anyways it was better for both me & mom when I avoided her more. I also really liked having time to myself knowing I would not be interrupted by my parents for anything.
Part of why I have this schedule nowadays is cuz I'm living with my girlfriend & she has weird fluctuating sleep & wake schedules. She generally likes having time to herself for a couple hours when she 1st wakes up. She likes spending time with me before she goes to bed in the early morning. She also tends to take a nap after being up a couple hours & that can make things more complicated. It works better if I go to bed a couple hours after she goes to bed in the early morning & when I wake up I just stay up till a couple hours after she goes to bed in the early morning.
I don't have much problems falling asleep & staying asleep nowadays but there were various times in my life when I did. The main cause was emotional stuff like my depression, OCD, & anxiety that were very bad. I was also very lonely & hated being single & sleeping alone. & when I wasn't single, being in a long distance relationship was very difficult as well & i hated being away from them & sleeping alone. I had some sleep disorders that were acting up including Sleep Paralysis & Night Terrors. I'm much better off in a serious romantic relationship that is not long distance. Being on the psych meds I'm on helps my OCD & anxiety a lot & probably my depression as well. Tiredness/drowsiness is also a potential side-effect of my meds.