Does anyone find this phrase triggering?

Post Reply New Topic

I used to be told by an ex friend I was overthinking something. For some reason this rubs me the wrong way. Like it seems like my emotions don't matter.

Admittedly, I don't have very thick skin so I guess it's more of a me problem. But I feel who ever says this are either apathetic or aren't in the same shoes as the other person. Just my two cents.

I only brought this up because I recently saw a user telling an original poster the same thing on Reddit.

People telling me that I'm overthinking makes my eyes roll.

To me, me overthinking things is a sign of executive dysfunction, a reaction to whatever current deficiencies I cannot make up with -- it's not really me, just a damnable symptom of not being able to self regulate at those moments or not being healthy enough to not get distracted by whatever ails; which can range from taking certain meds, being hormonal to not sleeping well.

If anything, the appearance of me overthinking are the times when I cannot think well and way ahead of what's in front of me, definately far from my usual better functioning self.

It only pisses me off if someone's being demanding and that I cannot get out of that damnable state.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

"You're overthinking it" = "Just wing it Nimrod!"
I actually appreciate being told this sometimes.

Overthinking is a thing that people do sometimes. It might not be pleasant to have it pointed out but it's useful to know when we are doing it if we are not seeing it.

I am an overthinker

It depends on who says it for me

Winging it isn't my problem.
After all, my own developmental focus is to be flexible or make do with whatever's limited.

The problem will be more like people expects me to read their mind.

Or that it's not overthinking at all; the appearance of overthinking is just an attempt to compensate or fight an overwhelm/freeze/blanking/fogging.

And it only just appeared like overthinking because I'm missing access to my already hard earned experience, processing levels and skills because **** executive dysfunction symptoms making me fall flat into a clueless, reckless idiot that just stands there doing and saying nothing contributing to nothing. ****ing hate those moments.


... Though I've yet to find out if that changed now that I'm progressing somehow.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

I'm prone to overthinking things, so being told not to is often useful advice.

My mother used to say I was "blowing everything out of proportion" whenever I was anxious or upset about something. Like that time Hurricane Juan hit Halifax and I got worried that a hurricane would come here as well, and she just went on saying I was making too big of it.

And then we had hurricane Fiona. In fact, almost everything I have had anxiety and dread about has come true in the past 24 years - climate change, pandemics, political corruption, overpopulation, death of a close family member, and humans just generally becoming more stupid every day. But mom doesn't growl at me for my worries anymore. I guess she's just softer in her old age. Or maybe she worries about it, too.

It doesn't trigger me but I'm aware that they might be wrong when they say that. If you're the type that finds it important to consider things in depth, it could be a bad thing to try to cut corners and ape the cognitive misers. Personally I think detail is usually important, and often more fun than grasping things glibly. Not always of course. Sometimes I've gained by noticing that I'm putting more thought into something than is good for me. But a lot depends on the way the advice is delivered, if it comes from another person. It's never nice to have the thoughts you've shared dismissed.

I think overthinking as an act itself, can often be caused by anxiety.

A person might analyze the 'what ifs' or imagine the implications of what somebody has said, even if there is no solid foundation of evidence for any substantial consequences to what has been said.

It is difficult to simply switch off the anxiety that can lead to overthinking and so telling somebody not to overthink is a bit like telling a person not to be anxious... it won't necessarily have any effect on that person.

^That's a good point. If thoughts are just spinning around in our heads and we can't stop them, it's not helpful when someone suggests that we should.

I may have assumed the wrong definition of "overthinking" - having looked around, I get the impression it's more about rumination and worry, about letting the same ideas go round your head over and over. I thought before that it just meant putting a lot of time and diligence into the consideration of a matter. That'll teach me not to assume a word's meaning is self-evident from the word itself. Why didn't anybody correct me?

The phrase "You're overthinking it" does not trigger me, but I have noticed that some people are triggered by it -- usually the same people who are triggered by the ticking of a clock, a cat sneezing in another room, or people talking outside and across the street.