Muslim Women?

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I would love a long denim skirt with no slit at the back. I have seen women wearing them but never found a store selling them. I asked some girls once and they said they shopped on the internet.

I think arm covers are a little strange, the lace ones. How covering is lace?

Some women are covering their hair/heads but they wear regular tight long sleeve tops and tight jeans. I don't see that as modest. I think a long skirt and a looser shirt would be more modest. I know some muslimahs believe that the waist should not be defined but I don't have a problem with that since I am a Christian.

I haven't been here for a while and wow so many posts, lovely to see some other muslim women and awesome to see some women from other walks of life here too!

Ramadan Kareem to all he muslims, i hope your fasts are going well inshaAllah (god willing)

I think his is very noble, Muslims are also supposed to be very careful about writing the name of God (Allah) on things that may find their way to a place of disrespect.

I also love that this thread has remained respectful and any attempts to steer it otherwise have been ignored! Not easy to do online these days!

As for the breastfeeding situation, i see it a bit differently, having breastfed in public before as a full hijabi (head to toe, not face) I was as modest as i could possibly be, but it is not an easy feat with a wriggling baby, believe you me! And IMHO there should be no shame in feeding your baby in public, breasts are multi purpose items, and one should make their best attempt to remain modest, but IMHO there should be NO stigma against breastfeeding in public. That is their PRIMARY purpose and noone should feel ashamed or be accused of lacking modesty for feeding their child. I don't mean to attack anyone... but these are my feelings on he issue.

I think if a non muslim wants to wear hijab for the sake of being modest, more power to her! Awesome! And i recommend shukronline.com as well, i have several clothes from there and if they weren't so expensive i'd have several more LOL they have good sales and often so definitely wait for the sales!

The Imam and Polygamy issue has been answered well already... no need to go there. Except that islamicly, the first wifes permission is not a requirement, but men are expected to be HONEST with everyone and treat everyone EQUALLY to he best of his ability, if he cannot treat them equally then he can only marry 1, IMO this includes letting the wives know about each other if they are able to do so just out of respect (in he past it may not have been possible because of the way they traveled and i believe that may be why it's not a requirement)

Anyway, i'm a revert since mid 2001, married to a Yemeni brother since mid 2002 and we have 2 kids who are 3 and 1. I'm known as UmmHend among muslims online.

Dilemma, ramadan mubarak to you too!
The fast is going very well this year (everyyear i am either pregnant,/breastfeeding/very ill)
I became a muslim "officially" in april 2002. But i made my decision and was praying and wearing the hijab months before.

Ramadan mubarak to all the sisters. May Allah accept your deeds, forgive your sins and strengthen your iman. I've been struggling with the Egyptian DMV for the past two weeks or so (finally finished, al-hamdulillah, and ready to ride!) So much has been said...where to start?

Well, I asked a question and then left it, so to legendoftheselkie: I'm glad I asked. That makes sense. Muslims are also very careful with Allah's Names in writing. My son's name is Abdur-Rahman, which contains one of Allah's Names, so everything he writes his name on is handled carefully. (I usually cut the letters apart to separate them because burning can get messy.) Your answer was so far from what I expected (I don't know what I was expecting or why...) I guess it's hard for me to imagine, because as Muslims, we say Allah's Name almost constantly, and I know I can't speak for everyone, but for me, it's because prayer is life. Whenever I mention something good that happened to me, I praise Allah (al-hamdulillah). If I admire something, I remember Allah and the good things He has made and that we shouldn't envy what Allah has given to others (ma sha' Allah). Someone does something nice for me, I thank him/her with a prayer (jazak Allah khair). I'm sure the Muslims know what I'm talking about. It's like breathing--remembering Allah is what makes us truly alive. I noticed you were curt in your response (or maybe not, I'm not good with these things), so I just wanted to say that I hope you weren't offended that I asked. I'm not threatened by sharing, so I assume others won't be either. No offense intended, anyway.

Chibi_Neko: I read about that show before and must have seen a few clips online, but after moving, I got stuck with a slow connection, so that's out. To tell you the truth, I had several issues with and doubts about what I saw. Perhaps the exposure is positive in some way, but it's hard for me to see more than cliche and stereotypes. I've noticed when it comes to the media (or at least what's written about it online that I can access from abroad), there's this Muslim humor focus ever since 9-11 that I find both compelling and odd. I'd be interested to hear anyone's thoughts on it (if anyone knows what I'm talking about).

AnnieDog: About non-Muslims wearing hijab or dressing modestly: This is in no way offensive to Muslims (IMHO, of course). My mother (who is very Christian) wore it when she came to visit me and even though her hair was hanging out everywhere, and she didn't know the tricks to keep everything in place, it was a sweet gesture. Hijab is all about removing unnecessary temptation from the public sphere. In America, this is generally done by behavioral limits, which is good, but I personally believe that clothing (in addition to modest behavior) is that much more effective. In Islam, this concept goes even further to include space limitations, too. Not that women (properly covered) are not allowed in public spaces (on the contrary!), but that seclusion with men is avoided to protect people from dodgy situations. My interactions with men are all very respectable and professional. Men always know their limits with me and covering my face makes it even easier to be assertive about my space.

One thing I've noticed (and this is not directed at AnnieDog) is that many people mistakenly think that hijab is a restriction placed on women and an accusation of all men, when it is in fact a protection for women (for themselves first and foremost because we are all vulnerable in some way) and a protection for men (from that which he likes, but that he has no business with). Hijab doesn't mean that all women are chattel and all men are dogs. A good Muslim woman is chaste and would protect her chastity even without it and a good Muslim man is chaste and would lower his gaze even without it (which he has to these days in this country); hijab just makes this easier and is therefore a mercy for those who want to be pure. But not all people are good and not all good people are good all the time.

Breastfeeding in public: I'm all for it, but it can be combined with modesty. The only places I can remember not finding a room to withdraw to was actually at the Pyramids (with my mother) and in a car (on a long trip), so I just kept my son under my clothes, taking care to provide sufficient ventilation. It took me a while to believe, but any light material draped over mother and child will not actually suffocate the baby and he may fight it at first, but he can become accustomed to it with consistency and practice. I used to have no shame breastfeeding in all-female gatherings, but since seeing others do it and seeing how it can be done modestly, I kind of wish I had learned to be more discreet. I think especially the tandem breastfeeding must have been too much for people.

Well, I suppose I should save a few comments for another post. Anyone who wants long denim skirts w/o slit, they're a dime a dozen in Cairo (well, figuratively that is). Maybe I should start an e-bay business... Then again, maybe not. Shopping is my nemesis.

UmmAR: Sorry, I wasn't trying to be curt- it's just an Aspie thing that pops up sometimes- I try to be nice, just have trouble communicating. Sometimes words just flow, and sometimes I just stop and don't know how to get going again. I'm really enjoying this conversation and discovering how much we have in common.
We, too, say things like ''Baruch Hashem''= Alhamdulill-h, and ''Im Yirtz'Hashem''= Insh'All-h, in our daily conversation. Hashem, literally The Name, is used to refer to G-d in non-prayer speech. There are other expressions used to signify G-d's Name. Of course we would not even say those words in an unclean place- the words ''Shalom'' and ''Shabbat'' (the Sabbath) are also not said in unclean places as they can be considered names of G-d also. I wish people would always remember that peace is G-d's name!
Have a blessed Ramadan! The Rosh Hashanah-Yom Kippur season is coming up for us, also a time of introspection and striving to fix ourselves and ultimately to fix this broken world- with the help of HaRachaman, the Merciful One. Salam!

I so love this conversation, so happy i started it.

legend, it is wonderful to learn more about our similarities! I agree! And i so understand you about the aspie communication issues. I hope your Rosh Hashanah-Yom Kippur times bring much blessing to you and your family and the world as well.

UmmAR, i really enjoy your posts also mashaAllah! Amin to your prayer. LOL @ tandem breastfeeding!

ghouna, i completely understand about being pregnant and breastfeeding! I have been like that the last few years as well. It's lovely to be able to fast without anything to worry about in that regard this year.

You have to see these headcoverings http://wegdan.com/index.html

What kind of headcovering do you wear?

I am born as Shiite muslim and I am now an ex-Shiite muslim atheist , would you behead me muslim ex-brothers and ex-sisters? Because according to your "peaceful" religion" , killing an ex-muslim is a duty and is very rewarded by your merciful Allah.

I have 1 question to the OP: why a non-muslim would convert to a such violent bloody religion while many originally-Muslims like me are running away from it?

MO2, waow!! these headcoverings look so complicated, very nice! but i dont wear any of those. i am boring! lol. i am dressed as a black little ghost! lol

LePetitPrince, i wouldn t kill you, because i am not a judge, we dont live under shariah law, and we dont kill anyone who is not a muslim anymore. I dont know much, the only thing i know about that subject is that, if a muslim decided to stop being one, and decided to fight against islam, then he would be killed under sharia law. But if a muslim decided not to stay as a muslim, but still respects the fact that other people are muslim then it is fine.
there is a hadith, when a man decided to revert as a muslim one day, and the following day he came to see the prophet and told him "i changed my mind" the prophet told him "it is fine"

i guess that some people are running away from islam because they misunderstood that religion.
I am a strict muslim, the way i dress, the way i behave outside. Yet you wont see me killing people, my husband has a beard, but he will not kill anyone. Who do you think i will kill? I have no need for that. First of all, i have to find a way to please Allah, and it is by praying, fasting , being nice to people...

{And whomsoever Allah wills to guide, He opens his breast to Islam, and whomsoever He wills to send astray, He makes his breast closed and constricted, as if he is climbing up to the sky.}
[The Holy Qur'an, Surat al-An`am 6:125]

Perhaps your knowledge is limited or skewed, because you seem to think that vigilantism is a part of Islam, when it is not. Your fate under a truly Islamic system is currently irrelevant as we (unfortunately and may Allah guide us to purify ourselves) currently have no state. If you are really concerned about your fate, there are plenty of good sources of information on Islam available now on the Internet, in both English and Arabic, and you are obviously privileged enough to have Internet access.

If your main objection to Islam is the fighting, then:

{Fighting was ordained for you though you dislike it, and it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows and you know not.}
[Surat al-Baqarah 2:216]

You must also have fiqh to understand what is going on in the world today. Just because a Muslim fights and just because he says it is in the Name of Allah does not mean that it is so. In fact, one of the first three types of people who will be thrown into the Hellfire are those [hypocrites] who said they were fighting for the sake of Allah when they were not.

In the end, it's your loss. We would welcome you back, but no one is going to miss you.

I don't like jumping to conclusions and making ignorant assumptions, so let me ask first: Islam does condone polygamy, right?

I just can't agree with that. Actually, I think it's okay if someone wants to have more than one spouse, but I can't stand the fact that only males get to do it. I know some of you mentioned that those ignorant of Islam think the religion treats them degradingly, but I think polygamy itself is that way.
Even in the Christian religion, God allowed polgamy. Abraham had a couple of wives.

I'm one who likes to see men and women valued equally and humans an indivivudals. Many religions degrade women, and it's not just cultural.

if a woman has 4 husbands, then has a baby... who is the father?

Personnally, i wouldnt want 4 husbands.

Polygamy is mostly to protect women,( the prophet married mostly widows and divorcees) to have the possibility to have more children etc...
A woman can have only one baby a year, so with 4 husbands it means 5 people will have only one baby. The other way the possibiliy is that there will be 4 babies.


Polygamy is allowed, but doesn t mean men have to marry four wives.
They can only do that if they can be fair. If they buy a house for one, they should do the same for the others...

I always joke with my husband when i ask him to bring me some milk at 10pm "imagine if you had more wives, you ll go crazy to buy milk everyday at that time"

Nice points, ghouna. It's amazing how many people are so eager to ignore basic biological facts. Personally, if I were ready to get married again, I'd definitely prefer a brother who is already married, but preferably to more than one woman. The jealousy with just one co-wife is just unbearable, but once you have two or three, there's already a degree of adjustment. I personally like my space, so having a husband who can be there when you need him, but who's gone half or two-thirds or so of the time sounds just perfect. Besides, all the good men are already taken.

Actually, it's taken me ten years of angst-ridden, wall-banging, tear-drying soul-searching to be able to write what I just did, but I mean every word of it. Sometimes we are just so attached to things that are completely arbitrary and non-essential. It feels good to be able to stand back and chuckle.

Oh, and freedom is about a lot more than just promiscuous sex.

Some problem with converts to Islam is the reason why they convert. I have met a few who just wanted to marry young and disrespect their parents. Smoking, taking drugs and being hoodlums just couldn't shock their parents enough so they decided to become muslims without really knowing much about Islam. One young man walking around with a diaper wrapped around his head and a tail hanging down like he was some important mullah. He didn't even have a beard.

I have met many people attending church that will tell me that they are muslims. They have been attending church for years yet they are afraid of telling anyone that they are Christians because they fear for their lives.

I have also experienced harassment for not fasting during Ramadan when I live in a country that does not even have a majority of muslims. This person who bullied had a reputation for being lazy. She would complain about having to get up early to cook and having to stay up late with parties the night before. She would think that her colleagues should do her work for her because she had to fast. She wanted to work at night so she could eat her meals. When she brought sweets at Eid she refused to give them to non-muslims. She was a very selfish person. She even claimed that she had never sinned. Was she following the five pillars?

Religion should make a believer a better person, not entitle them to bully and be cruel or worse to others.

Waow!! !

You know, i met a lot of muslims and sometimes converts forget where they are coming from.

Yes that is right.
Since i became a muslim, i have more respect for myself and obviously for others.

You are right, some muslims don t understand their own religion. (well i think even with christian and jewish, they dont always understand their beliefs)

LOL how can anybody claim that they had never sinned?
Eid is in less than two weeks, i am looking forward to it.
every thursday, i go to a home educator group, and i told them that the thursday following Eid, i will bring sweets, and explain to children why i am doing so.
As a muslim, i have to be friendly, respectful. Sometimes i hear bad words from sisters mouths against non muslim, when themselves used to be non muslim. I dont really understand that. (well maybe some part, but they are non muslim who are better in their behaviour than some muslims)

In Egypt, when a Christian becomes a Muslim, his family generally tries to kill him or kidnap and imprison him in the church dungeon, and if they can't do that, they sometimes show up at their door and throw acid in the person's face to disfigure them. Egyptians are always shocked that my family still speak to me after becoming Muslim. Oh, and everyone's afraid of Christians because they do magic on people.

Assuming any of this is true, what does it say about Christianity?

Exactly, nothing.