After 35, you turn invisible.

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who would like some attention may I recommend hardware stores. Basically it is a matter of competition, there are not many women who get in there so one automatically stands out. I was hit on 2 times in 2 days in paint stores. It was so unexpected that I had to laugh.

Also dressing properly (for your body type) can do wonders. Watch "what not to wear", they have some good suggestions.

and i have to add that i think i got attention from men couple of times due to my brains, well not brains as much as my phd. somehow that turns them on. it is mostly engineering types, and around my age (38). younger guys that are around just view me as a natural disaster.

also it depends on the community, latino guys never see me as attractive.

My boyfriend is almost 35 (he's 32) and I don't imagine he was any different when he was 20, and I don't imagine he will be any different when he is 80. If he is perfect for you he will not become invisible, and if you are perfect for him you won't. I'm sure I would still have fallen for this man whether he was 85 or 15.

Consider this: Maybe when you were in your teens or early 20s there were many guys who were attracted to you based on looks, personality, mentality, whatever.

Do you mean to say you gave every guy who showed interest in you the time of day? Were there not guys you might not even make eye contact with and pretend as if he were a helpless disoriented drunk bum begging for change on the corner the hookers hang out on?

It's just devil's advocate. You say you feel judged, you feel older and look older and are self-conscious because people look at you differently than perhaps 10 or 15 years ago. But think about the people you may have treated that way. I'm not saying you have but knowing humanity the way I do I think it's fair to say most of us have done that.

You're not at the age where you can be promiscuous with the most attractive specimens of the human species now. If you haven't found love and all you see is skin deep then you likely never will. Now is the time to examine what is on the inside and the people you will find you care about most will look at you the same way.

I'm 41; at 6'1", I'm always "invisible." Ahhh, the irony. No, seriously - I can be grocery shopping, and people will walk right into me. "Oh, sorry, I didn't see you there!" Ummm, ok - did they think they'd bumped into a tree growing in the middle of the produce section?! The invisibility to men I find attractive kills me, though - always has, and probably always will. I'm not an ugly girl, and yet I've always been treated as such.

I find just the opposite. At 45, I have something I never did untile recently - a modicum of self-confidence - and that (I've been told) translates into a presence that most people find difficult to not notice, even though don't try to deliberately draw attention. Wherever I go, I always have a "not from around here" look. People seem to at as minimum want to investigate, and usually are at least somewhat intrigued. Being 175cm (5-9) with long red hair will attract attention most anywhere, and being size 18 doesn't seem to put too many people off - the intrigue occurs at a different level, apparently. I look and feel best wearing red, and will dress in red more than half the time. I don't consider myself particularly attractive, but a considerable number of people treat me at though I am.

In some places, very prominently in Asia and somewhat less so in eastern Europe, I appear so different from the general population that it is uncommon for me to walk down the street for more than a few minutes, either in a small village or a large city, without someone I don't know stopping me for some purpose or other.

I have always been noticeably different, sometimes more subtly, other times unmistakably, but over the years I have gone from being embarrassed and ashamed to understanding my differences and making the most of them - and even enjoying it.

I'm another 6 foot redhead and a bonny lassie! I wasn't invisible but would often be shunned by folk I wanted to approve of me until i had a truly beautiful freind, 6', tawny golden hair like a lions mane... and it made her life soooo hard. Our 'social disability' is nothing compared to the trauma her beauty gave her- everyone wanted her on their own terms, if she rejected them kindly they'd often stalk her or take her anyhow. Baaaad.

I love the pagan way of looking at female aging- each stage of our lives holds beauty for many beyond a physical aspect. Anyone with kids has felt unconditional love and admiration far outweighing what an attracted, stimulated idealising potential partner can offer- anyone who has ever spread the love by helping someone has recieved the regard and gratitude from a far purer source than the fountain of pretend youth offered by 'medicine'.