To the males who keep posting in Women's Disscussion

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Hey! I would be really keen to work with other autistic women to develop a safe space for us, not to replace WP or the Women's Discussion area, or to replace some of the groups on FB, but as an adjunct. This is a great forum to discuss things we don't mind people like Lazar popping in and commenting on, but I have felt for a long time that we need somewhere extra to FB groups or open forums. If anybody is interested in working on this sort of thing with me, please send a PM.

No, the problem is that simian Man thinks he's always entitled to his own expression, no matter the time or place, like his penis is the magnetic north all us women are supposed to revolve around. It's the universal constant: Men talk, women listen. f**k that. Women deserve a certain degree of autonomy and privacy, but apparently some (most?) men can't stand that thought. Stampeding into our board their with bull-headed self-righteous arrogance is just another way men deliberately and knowingly violate women.

Have to agree with that. Whether or not males know they are doing this, they are doing it because they have been raised to believe the world revolves around them. The ones who come to terms with that and work through it are few and far between, but they do exist right here on WP.

In the site rules for this section it does not say males are restricted from posting, just says should they post they should keep in mind this section focuses on females and womens issues that they are unlikely to relate to, too much...but no prohibiting them from posting...some of you need to go back and read the rules for this forum it seems.

Also this is not a section for male bashing/negatively generalizing...this being the womens section does not mean its meant as a safe place to promote negativity/hate towards those outside the female gender, so if that is going on shame on the people doing that....I just don't post in here very often so not sure what most posts consist of. I'd hope its more healthy discussion of women specific issues rather than a male bashing fest. I am sure most women here would be offended if we had a 'males' section and the males proceeded to use it as a place to generally trash talk women....maybe there should be a males section to discuss issues more specific to males as well. But anyone of any gender should be able to post in either forum so long as they keep in mind what the focus is.

I don't mind men posting here but my goodness do I ever wish there were a thread for men to specifically bash women in, because I am sick and tired of the misogynist posts from that small faction of men here who sincerely seem to hate women.

Here's the thing, though. The issues I bring up about misogyny are about the systemic oppression of women.
Here's a link that might help. http://www.publiceye.org/oppression/systemic.html

Because women are not equal in society (meaning equal pay, etc.) we are systemically oppressed. We can cannot oppress men in this system. It is impossible. If women hate males then those women have an issue they have to work out in themselves, just as misogynists need to work out those issues for themselves. W are unable to oppress men under this system. If we want to vent about misogyny and being subjected to reading b.s. from misogynists well we're going to and anybody who doesn't like it is going to have to learn to deal with it.

Don't take discussions of systems of oppression personally. I don't take misogyny personally. I look at it as a disgusting and distorted (sick) view of women as a class of people, not hatred of me because I am a woman. If you are upset that women are angry over our own oppression, that's your issue. If someone attacks you personally, I would defend you just like I would anybody else, irrespective of where they fell on the gender binary and irrespective of their sex.

To understand women's issues and why women need space that is free of male input, all you have to do is read the threads from those few deeply unsettled misogynists who repeatedly post here about how much they loathe women. I wish this were not the case and we weren't subjected to this crap everywhere we go, but it is what it is. And we're angry. And rightly so. And anybody who respects women should also be angry about it, and not take our anger personally.

This is the theoretical ideology I subscribe to when discussing women and women's issues. I respect others may disagree with this analysis, but it is one area in which I cannot be shifted. I am a long time student of women's history and culture, and a long time feminist and anarchist.

http://flag.blackened.net/revolt/ppapers/women.html

But this part of the forum is not a space free of male input, and its not meant to be according to the rules...its just meant to 'focus' on females and our specific issues(then again not so sure I identify as a female gender wise maybe more somewhere in between male and female) no denying I am of the female sex though as I've got all the hardware, just not sure of the software.

Also as a whole I suppose women with the current system are not an a position to systematically oppress males per say...but there are males who get in abusive relationships where they are the abused and the female is the abuser, or male children who maybe have been abused/neglected by female relatives or school staff...So to claim males cannot be oppressed by females in any circumstance due to the current status quo seems to have an air of BS to me based on that. I'd say in many ways both genders are oppressed by the status quo...........I mean how many females who think males and females should be treated the exact same think its ok if in a male vs. female fight the male hits the female(not that fighting is a great way to handle things) but seems many females and even males would say even in that context its wrong if the male hits the female, even if the female is hitting them and they are defending them-self...while outside of that saying we should have exact equal treatment. I just think negatively generalizing a whole group based on something like sex, gender, sexual orientation, clothing style, race and such things is nasty regardless of who it comes from.

It bothers me just as much if a guy says 'women(insert negative thing)' and never specify 'some' women but speak as if we're all the same and have the same flaws/negative traits...as it bothers me if a female makes similar negative generalizations about males. When in most cases people are actually talking about a type of male or female that bothers them but word it to seem like they're saying everyone of that group is like that...I think this creates a lot of arguing.

Yes, it would be good to get the vitriol all in one place. Although it could be argued that L&D serves this purpose.
There were some heated feuds between the genders a few months back where male bashing went to the extreme. I think we are seeing the pendulum swing the other way.

That bothers me, too, and I agree with you. The thing is, all males have been raised with privilege, male privilege. There is backlash against that and I think those males who recognise their own privilege don't participate in that backlash. Just as there is privilege in being NT, or privilege in being white, or privilege in being heterosexual - there is male privilege. I think the key is to discuss these issues theoretically and not as personal attacks.

I guess I just do not see all males as having any specific privilege over females....almost seems like in a lot of ways females get raised with more privilege. I mean it seems society is much easier on the female who has trouble finding her way in the world and is still living at home at age 30....but take a male in that position and the stigma is more extreme than it is for a female. I mean I've never been in the upper middle class/wealthy realm always lower class and so that is a lot of what I've been exposed to....maybe the male privilege is more apparent higher up in the economic hierarchy...because in my experience observation I see a lot of disadvantaged males or males at a disadvantage due to society expectations of males that certainly don't get a break from society, just get stigmatized as losers and what not.

Perhaps in some ways males are privileged and in some ways females are, and a lot of the animosity comes from neither side being able to see in what ways they are privileged/disadvantaged compared to the other....guess too much us vs. them mentality when it comes to discussing these things a lot of times.

I wish everyone would read the gosh dang rules.





No, men are not and should not be prohibited from using this forum. Yes, they are expected to use their judgement when they do post. No, there is not forum intended just for males. Yes, there is a reason for it.

http://amptoons.com/blog/the-male-privilege-checklist/

There are stats to back up the reality of male privilege but I have long ago stopped sourcing these things for people who doubt the validity of women's inequality. The information is available on the net for anybody interested in researching. I don't really engage with willful ignorance (and try not to be willfully ignorant myself).

I don't doubt inequality, but any inequality I've faced I can think of a different inequality a male has faced...so just from what I see it seems the privilege is situation....I mean is a screwy system and there should not be legal inequalities, but it seems females at least get favored more in some situations/contexts over males which isn't right either. Like for instance when I got my disability I think part of it was that I am a female, can't help thinking if I was male I would have had a lesser chance of getting it. Also at least in my city there are much better resources for homeless females than males, most shelters only take women and some will take transsexual females. Much of the time with homeless couples females are concerned about their SO who has to stay out all night in the cold(I guess not so much in the summer) and try to make it through the night unschathed while they get a place to stay the night. I don't doubt inequalities I just doubt that they are all directed at females. I think a problem is a group of privileged white men came up with what 'normal' is, defined 'success' and made it the image to strive for....and so systematic oppression towards anyone outside of that norm including plenty of males. So I guess I'd say I don't think it serves much purpose to be bitter towards the male gender over systematic oppression a much smaller group of individuals has created that hardly includes all males.

Yup. I often stay out of this forum because I'm sick of women going "hey, other women, what do you think of this?" and men responding with "Well as a MAN, I think..." I mean, they're usually not being offensive but it's really nothing to do with them.