Is Intercourse Satisfying?

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I chose that yes, sexual intercourse is satisfying by itself, but only because it was the answer that best fits my situation. I've never been able to reach orgasm from intercourse alone, but that usually doesn't bother me. Sometimes I like to have sex just for the sake of being close to my husband and bonding with him physically.

I can't stand being given oral sex. It's too uncomfortable and I don't like the way it feels. If I need to get off, I'll usually just take care of it myself during intercourse or after. My husband doesn't mind, so it works out well for us.

Androbot, your topic made me feel sad for you. To trade the use of your body for practical favors just seems so utterly debased. I hope eventually you can develop friends-without-benefits of both genders, to get out of this rut.

Thank you. Perhaps I will meet new people. That would be nice.

I find it satisfying but not necessarily in a sexual way exactly. I do enjoy it and the feel of it and would be upset if I knew I was never going to experience it again. However, it takes much longer and more effort to actually orgasm during intercourse and it's not as good (compared with on my own). So I'm happy with having sex for the fun of it but getting 100% of my orgasms from masturbation. However, I usually end up having to make myself during sex for the man's ego. They never seem to get the "I could make myself come during this but I don't feel like it" kind of mentality. I enjoy sex because it physically feels nice and I enjoy the intimacy.

I thought that some might find this study interesting.

http://www.livescience.com/43528-clitor ... rgasm.html
http://www.jsm.jsexmed.org/article/S174 ... 9/fulltext
http://www.bustle.com/articles/48142-5- ... can-matter

Makes sense, obviously the study doesn't cover other important aspect like psychological.

I have more of the psychological aspects of the problem, I think. But thank you for introducing me to the concept of "size does matter" for women. You learn something new everyday.

For me sex is very important and very satisfying because I have a high sex drive and as long as I get penetration I have an orgasm. Oral sex does nothing for me.

As for you Androbot don't let this jerk use you!

I have always found morale judgement passing patronising. If this guy was abusing or forcing androbot01 to have sex with him, that's a whole other kettle of fish. It seems to me they have reached some kind of mutually beneficial arrangement that works for them. I say good for them.

It is what it is. I've had medical procedures that were far worse and gained me less.

This neurotypical world is full of lies. There must be some chemical that they have that makes them miss the obvious. I'm glad I never brought any children into this madness.

In my mind, I wish you were satisfied sexually. I would like all people to be satisfied sexually. It's a very fulfilling thing.

You don't mean harm to anybody--so why shouldn't you find a guy who is able to bring you to climax?

Oh, that's what you mean by 'trade off'. I was trying to reply to your post under another topic but WP wouldn't let me.

Why don't you try to look for other aspies around you? Maybe they would be better companion. And in terms of whether to have sex with this guy, that depends, you mentioned at that you kind of enjoy it.

I voted no. Sex is a huge chore for me and I get nothing out of it. I like hugging someone in bed, but nothing else. I can't remember ever having a physical sex drive and doubt I ever will.

Like others here, I have traded sex for other things in the past. I enjoy male company and don't usually have any female friends, so the sex was a trade off to avoid isolation. If I could find women who had very 'male' brains and interests like me then I would no longer bother with sex at all.

My current partner and I argue over this a lot as I think he knows I don't really enjoy sex. I enjoy making him happy, but otherwise it's the equivalent of doing the ironing or washing up!

After reading the thread, I think your problem might have more to do with .. what will you do once this arrangement is terminated .. ??

Are you nt or are you on the spectrum?

I know how difficult making friends is and how much it sucks being lonely. I do have some tips though if you're interested.

I don't want to be patronising, I am on the spectrum and my methods have worked, though they are very difficult at first.

But I understand that not everyone wants to 'play the game' of life and body language for the nt folk out there.

Here to help anyway, if you want.

That really sucks!

I hate it when somebody uses sex as a bargaining tool, too!

I hate it when somebody blackmails me for sex when I don't feel like it.

I would imagine it's no good when you are penetrated without wanting to be penetrated. It's a pretty sucky feeling, I would imagine.

Have you ever desired sex in your life? If not, I would hope you find a man who doesn't believe sex is the "end all," too.

Please don't feel bad for me asking this: but have you ever had a crush on a woman?

As for the sex thing, yes it is pleasing.

I find that if I enjoy pleasing the other person, then that in turn makes them want to reciprocate and please me, which builds warmth and enjoyment. This definitely requires some effort and playfulness is a plus.

It's one of those circular cycle things, in that you get back what you put in.

I have definitely made the most out of the worst situations by being in the moment and giving it my best.

But it's not nice to be used for sex, so I hope you can get out of it and surround yourself with some nicer people and more rewarding friendships.