list of female AS traits

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Totally me, except that I don't cry ever, am obsessive about hygiene and don't have a problem acting appropriately with crushes.

I think a lot of the traits listed get attributed to other causes for women by pop psychology. If a woman doesn't want a relationship, or prefers animal companionship, or doesn't perform feminine gender in the prescribed way, people chalk it up to some past abuse. There are so many convenient stereotypes to draw on to explain why women don't behave as expected. I can see how AS gets overlooked in us.

Are they sure they didn't follow me around and use me as an example?

There was nothing on that list that I could object to. At all. That's me, completely especially: I'm 23 and people think I'm 15 or 16, eccentric, boy do I love just wetting my hair and leaving it at that in the morning!, musical and artistic!, very self-taught!, uber physical when I'm happy, mutism, prefers the company of animals!

Wow...

My 'friend' invited me to her private, distance-wedding in Hawaii...and I thought to myself, "Wait.......she likes me that much? Wait. Since when does she view me as this 'close'? Wait, we're THAT close as friends?!" And I can't go because I don't have the money and I would die of sensory overload.

I'm unnerved by the fact that the website says that it may be difficult to find a reliable person to do the prognosis. If that has become such an issue in Adult AS, why does the website not have a section on WHERE to find those reliable sources? By country and state if possible!

I run into the exact same problem. I was diagnosed at 20 (~1.5 years ago) and most people I tell (friends, family, etc) are shocked and say something like, "Really? I never would have guessed!" or "But you have social skills!".

It is really quite frustrating. Somehow everyone knows better than my psychiatrist (including my 24 year old sister who is a b***h to me about it).

When my mom tells people that she is diabetic they don't go, "Really?! Are you sure??? I don't believe you!!" or s**t like that.

Id est, I totally feel your frustration and you are very much not alone here

Just started a new topic on it in this section of the forum

It's how I felt at the time - I hated uni, and I couldn't understand why I wasn't enjoying it, because all anyone had ever drummed into me was good it was going to be for ME. I didn't even wanna go! So I think that, due to undiagnosed AS, a lot of issues had not been addressed or resolved, so it manifested itself as bipolar whenever I was distressed. And because I was doing a psychology degree, and wasn't particularly au fait with ASDs, I naturally assumed it was bipolar, and got diagnosed. I especially misinterpreted joyful stimming as mania.

The only one that doesn't fit me is the "youthful" thing. People have always thought I am much older than I really am. I guess because I've always preferred hanging out with adults, and the fact that I was the tallest kid in my grade until 7th grade when all the boys decided to have growth spurts over the summer. I've been the same height since then. I haven't told my family or friends I have AS yet, but I expect they won't believe me. I know because a couple of years ago my aunt who's in her 40's was diagnosed with schizophrenia, and they were all skeptics. They all thought "that's just how Sue is." Until then the thought was that she was just slow or mentally ret*d. Although they were more accepting of my cousin's OCD. Who knows? Maybe I just won't tell them.

Not sure what to think as I am exploring this site as the mother of a young adult with ADHD, GAD, OCD & Aspergers but I keep identifying traits which I experience myself. Most items on that list fit me. I know I never fitted in at school, college or most places I have worked in, and have always felt 'different' but got on with stuff and developed stratagies to overcome any hurdles that get in my way. I have had to develop stratagies since I was very young, to survive, due to the circumstances I was living in. I have spent most of my life in anxious and stressful situations and therefore always decide what to do based on avoiding stress.

Somehow I got through school and college but I definately did not acheive my potential. I have survived decades of bullying, which I concede I allowed to continue because making the change happen was too anxiety provoking (but its done now, the new me is here). However, somehow I am doing well at work. Most aspects of my job interest me and I spend hours perfecting things until I acheive the desired results. This has led to promotion. I never expect to have friends at work and therefore am not dissappointed. I have realized that people don't 'connect' with me and I am misinterpreted, but I always think I am clear and precise so I don't understand why if I am not understood. I manage a team, and have just been accused of being dismissive and uncaring because of the way I dealt with a request for reduced hours, but I conducted the process strictly in accordance with the company rules (there was no provision for the work to be covered by the rest of the team so I refused) I am logical, practical, methodical and fair. I don't know what else to be. I am also sensitive to what I feel is unfair critisism, which really upsets me.

I have recently had a long conversation with someone in an association that supports Aspies, for advice re my son, and he said he is 100% certain that I also have Aspergers. I was taken aback, that was not the reason for my call. I am not sure how seriously to take this, although I do admit I have lots of sensory issues, what do I do? I have not considered this before.

I'm not diagnosed, but as I have gathered information I started to think that very very probably I must be aspie - it just explains sooo much. And this list gives kind of strong evidence. "Yes" to about 70% of items, few "no"s and more "don't know"s.

I have mentioned to some people that I think I am a mild autist, and few times got "There's nothing wrong with you" answer. Including from one psychology student who is my co-worker. Well he hasn't observed me enough yet, I guess

I have learned to fake normal interaction. 10 years ago and 5 years ago (I'm 27) I only answered questions and if I didn't hear what the other person was saying I just did a "dont't know"-like gesture with my shouders and kept on being mute. At the same time I was desperate about not having friends and good time with them as others did. But I somehow started changing myself, went to karate training and discovered how easy it is to talk what is needed at work. Most recent victory is that first time in my life (don't remember childhood actually) I approached and started talking to a stranger out of my personal interest only, no pragmatic reason at all. Stuttering and comic it was, but I did it .

With all this I wanted to say that I think all things which I couldn't do few years ago, is the 'performance'. I still make few eye contact and wierdly play with a zipper of my sweatshirt when I must approach co-workers for some talking But I can fake enough and with it overcome misery about my lack of contact with other people.

Thanks for posting this...

Thanks for posting. That was very helpful.

I had no idea women had different signs of Asperger's than men. Jeez, someone needs to show this to my psychiatrist. He thinks that just because I can catch a pen he throws at me and that I joined Drill Team and have two friends that I'm not Asperger's at all. However, I have ALL of the symptoms they listed, every single last one. Some a bit less than others, sure, but I can definitley say that I put on an act everytime I associate with another human. And I was also diagnosed bi polar: twice. And manic depressive has come up frequently.

I should become a psychologist; I feel like I am smarter than 8/10 of my therapists (except two who were insanly insightful), and I'm already studying it anyway.

Thank you for posting the list, I don't think I can find anything that doesn't apply at least occasionally. It's nice to fit something at last, and have something that reminds me, and shows others, that I'm not bullshitting.

i am a textbookcase. i should really show this to my family, and maybe they'll stop treating me like a zoo animal

The list is really interesting and fits so well!
I am currently in the process of trying to explain the idea of feeling "half male/half female" (as it appears on the list) to my psychologist. I had no idea that it was anything common to Aspie women. Did anyone else have a "lightbulb" moment on this one?

Ha, I just emailed that to my mother.

I don't know enough to assess whether they especially pertain to women, I think there must be a very fine line indeed between them, but many of those completely fit me. I think I've seen it before.