when you see a woman who is very "put together"

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When I see a woman who is very "put together" all I can think is

She must be very tired!

I have managed to get close to it on rare occasions when I was younger and it is not only exhausting but self-crippling.

When you cannot use your own hands due to long fingernails,

When you cannot bend over to retrieve a dropped object due to restrictive clothing,

When you cannot play with a child or animal who unexpectedly pops into your day, for fear of ruining SOMETHING you're wearing,

You have managed to turn yourself into a cripple and make your life very miserable, in my opinion.

I know that at a moment's notice I can drop to the floor and help someone or plug in some cables or lift a box or a shopping bag with no trouble.

I may not be "put together" but I am put together in the right ways.

:> earthmom

The other day my mother noticed that I have been wearing the same beaten pair of running shoes with odd laces for about two years.

She said, "Good God, are those my old runners that I gave you about two years ago?"

I said, "Yes. They're very comfortable."

I LIKE my old beaten running shoes. At least I haven't contributed to slave labor somewhere in the third world by buying a new pair of brandname runners. And my old runners tell the world that I am not materialistic and that I care more about who people really are rather than what people look like and other superficial aspects.

I think that those type of women must wake up very early in the morning just to fuss with their appearance. I mean, they have to shower, wash their hair, then get out, blow dry it, style it, put on makeup, pick out something to wear, get dressed, and then figure out which shoes/jewelry/etc matches.

I can't say that I know from personal experience or anything, but I'm willing to bet that that all takes at least 2 hours each morning. Myself on the other had, my alarm goes off 15 minutes exactly before I need to be out of the door. Quick brush of the hair, brush the teeth and throw on jeans and a tshirt (which means I never have to deal with matching), and I'm out.

I can't imagine why anyone would want to devote so many hours of their life to their appearance. There are so many fun things you could be doing in that time instead. I can't comprehend why someone would choose "an hour with a curling iron" over "an hour with a PS2."

I always wondered how people with extremely long nails managed to wash their behinds and privates.



Some clothes are only meant to be worn while you are standing straight up. I have seen some women who couldn't bend over because the mini skirts they were wearing were too short. I have also seen women wearing low rider jeans have their butt cracks showing when they sit down.



I guess well put together people have nannies and hire people to handle their pets for them.




No well put togther person would be doing such menial tasks. They might break a fingernail. Besides that's what maids and butlers are for.

LOL

I guess I just need a staff and then I will have LOTS of free time to spend on making myself look beautiful!

Yeah!

I just tend to think... how much time does she waste getting that way every day? LOL...besides if I ever DID acheive that... I am sure it would only last about 2 minutes and I would get caught in a tornado, a torrential downpour, or the car would die in the middle of the interstate.

Personally I think someone should atleast spend some time making yourself look presentable. (I am talking about BOTH genders) It shows you can take care of yourself and respect yourself IMO. However it seems alot of people especialy women spend way too much time on their appearence. I mean God forbid a guys perfecttly gelled hair falls out of place, ro a girl's fhair gets frizzy from the rain or her makeup smears.

When I see women like that who overdo it ( mostly late teens and early 20s) I've found tehm to be shallow and stuck up and have no substance whats so ever and attract just the same. I think these girls would be more attractive if they worked on their personality rather than their looks but maybe on subconcious level their trying to compensate for the many things they lack

I look at extremely preened women and think 'yuck'. Well its all false isn't it? I don't mind tidy hair and a bit of make up (I do this myself, especially for work) but when women overdo it its horrible. The natural look is much better, I think that to be too well done tarnishes beauty, not enhances it.

I would like to think that I'm pretty put together and it doesn't take me that long. Yes, I have to dry my hair because it's long. I need makeup or I look like a zombie. I do make sure my clothes are clean and match. I don't have a nanny or dog walker. It doesn't take me that long to do it all. My children are also clean and neat. I understand what some of you are saying, but I'm sort of offended at the idea that because I try to look as good as I can that I'm too into myself or wasting my life away because I use makeup. I have very low self esteem and if putting on a little lipgloss makes me feel better why should it make someone else feel bad? I'm no beauty queen but all that matters is that I think that I look good.

Nina,

No offense was intended and I'm sorry if you feel hurt by this thread. I think the deciding factor is that we're talking about women who spend an inordinate amount of time making themselves into something other than themselves.

I, too, am clean and neat. I dress simply. I have learned what clothes are classic, so they don't go out of 'style' but they're not really in 'style'. I change them, I rotate them so I don't appear to wear the same thing days in a row, but the same overall theme and style is there. I don't wear 'outfits' but rather a neat and clean shirt and a neat and clean pair of pants. I wear very little jewelry if any. I wear no makeup and only put something on my lips if they are chapped or sore and need it.

I have very long hair that I keep braided in a single braid down my back. I brush it in the morning and at night to remove tangles and when I get up I braid it to keep it out of my way. Simple, clean - hasn't changed in 26 years or so.

Contrast that sort of thing with the woman who shops continually because only the certain item will 'go' with that certain outfit. And the outfit must be dry cleaned, and the fingernails are fake and applied by professionals and the makeup is perfect and complete and totally conceals what the woman actually looks like.

Ask yourself - if your child fell down would you rush to his aid or hesitate because it might mess up your outfit, wrinkle your skirt, run your nylons or chip a nail? If someone kisses you do you turn your cheek to avoid smudging your lipstick or do you just plant one on them and enjoy the kiss?

Do you use a pencil to dial a phone because you are handicapped by those long gorgeous (horrific) fingernails?

Do you lay out your clothes the night before, the week before, or plan them weeks in advance and make special trips to stores to buy the perfect accessory before you allow yourself to wear that complete outfit out in public?

I think you can see the difference. When I see women who are in that state of mind I think they are selfish and wasteful and obsessive and the most important one - very very very insecure.

As a side note - make up is literally 'making up' for something you feel that you lack. If you wash your face and go out in the world tomorrow you will feel naked, and in truth you are because the top layers of our skin and nails die when they are not given proper oxygen and sunlight and energy. Makeup and chemicals kill those cells and create a layer, which appears listless and colorless and plain. The cells are starved and not allowed to breathe.

If you leave your makeup off and go out into the sunshine, take a brisk walk in the fresh air and then look in the mirror you will see color in your cheeks and a fresh, clean face. If you do this regularly your skin will regrow and tan and regain its natural flush and energy. There is a point where other women will believe that you wear makeup when the truth is you have none on. You may even get asked what kind you wear because it appears so much more radiant and healthy looking. Surprise - it really is healthy and radiant skin!

:> earthmom

YES! There are so many people i know who waste hours on this.

I understand if you have something like a scar or a bruise you want to cover up but I don't understand the point of wasting so much time to look good for just a few hours. It is a waste of time and money

I think as long as you have clean, untorn clothes a clean face and body and brushed hair that should be fine.

IMO, most people who make them selves "presentable" would look fine just spending a little bit of time on there appearence

Whenever I see a woman like that, I mainly just wonder how much time they waste per day on superficial garbage when they could be having fun or doing things to improve their minds.

Funny! This talk sounds so familiar to what I have heard and read from neuraltypical women. They too wonder why a women would spend so much time on herself with all the things that a woman has to do. But consider: They may have husbands that appreciate their wives or significant other looking "put together". It may be a cultural thing. In my culture, "jewelry" is very much a feminine thing, the more, the better. I also have observed that many women do enjoy make-up but not the liquid or otherwise foundation. So if it is kept in its proper place, cosmetics do serve somewhat of a purpose. Also, if it does not take away from our families or other much more important matters.

I have found that when I am very depressed, I won't put on any sort of make-up.

I feel sorry for her and think that while she spent two hours this morning getting ready, i had a big breakfast, i read a chapter in the book i'm currently reading and i got some chores done around my appartment. Then she laughs at me, because i have bad skin or something, and i just walk by thinking that you can really feel the sun on your face when you're not wearing make-up.

Oh God, try living in Japan! Women do themselves up like that just to go to the grocery store! It doesn't make any sense to me. I see them on the train applying their makeup and it takes them forever. I just don't know why anyone would go to that much effort for something that is not a major special occasion.