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League_Girl
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02 Oct 2011, 8:16 pm

Think of something happy and it might make you smile. Also keep your lips wide so you are smiling. Also grin.


I seem to be smiling all the time and have no control over it and I have been asked what is wrong because I get a look on my face. I feel to keep myself from smiling, I must keep my lips curled in at all times. That be tiring.

I also remember being in third grade and we got this new girl and when I would look at her, she make a face at me showing me her front teeth. One day I asked her why does she do that and she told me that is the look I have when I am looking at her. I didn't get it.



skenasis
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03 Oct 2011, 3:05 am

I used to get that a lot. Not so much any more, though. I guess people just don't care at uni.



Ai_Ling
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04 Oct 2011, 5:40 am

People always think Im stressed or sad even when Im not. Its irritating. I dont know whats the best thing to tell people when they ask me whats wrong. I often saying nothing but NTs commonly do that when theirs actually something wrong. So people will just take it as theres something wrong but I dont want to discuss it. I dont know how to tell people, I always look this way even when Im fine.



crayonfish2
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05 Oct 2011, 7:48 pm

hey sorry to just butt in where i dont belong(im a guy :oops: ) but i couldnt help noticing it to be honest if u always look mad or upset to people(im diagnosed and i can tell sometimes) they may try to steer clear of u which knowing how lonely it can be to be an aspie means it'll just make it harder to make friends later on. try to have a little more humor in or life and try to be cheery. if u have a hard time just think of all the things u have going for u try to put on a smile (even if its fake) and people with be more social towards u. i used to not be so cheerful and i know how we get our emotions off of others examples i found some thing that works usually i just watch anime cartoons like japanese with english subs i know it may sound weird but it helps. by the way when guys see a girl who always looks sad or mad they figure that ull have low self esteem and will see u as "easy pickin's" for getting u to do what they want. we kinda think hey she looks sad maybe she has problems at home or some where else so this is my chance to swoop in," he sees ill go to her get to know her and get her to open up she sees me as her main person for her problem she'll trust me more and i get to try to have a lustful relationship with her". trust me its how guys see it how do i know ive tried it (being an aspie ive failed but seen it work ). during highschool guys say forever they mean till i graduate and leave.

again sorry to but in but i figured it would help to let u ladies know btw im only 16 going on 17



hartzofspace
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06 Oct 2011, 10:13 am

crayonfish2 wrote:
hey sorry to just butt in where i dont belong(im a guy :oops: ) but i couldnt help noticing it to be honest if u always look mad or upset to people(im diagnosed and i can tell sometimes) they may try to steer clear of u which knowing how lonely it can be to be an aspie means it'll just make it harder to make friends later on. try to have a little more humor in or life and try to be cheery. if u have a hard time just think of all the things u have going for u try to put on a smile (even if its fake) and people with be more social towards u. i used to not be so cheerful and i know how we get our emotions off of others examples i found some thing that works usually i just watch anime cartoons like japanese with english subs i know it may sound weird but it helps. by the way when guys see a girl who always looks sad or mad they figure that ull have low self esteem and will see u as "easy pickin's" for getting u to do what they want. we kinda think hey she looks sad maybe she has problems at home or some where else so this is my chance to swoop in," he sees ill go to her get to know her and get her to open up she sees me as her main person for her problem she'll trust me more and i get to try to have a lustful relationship with her". trust me its how guys see it how do i know ive tried it (being an aspie ive failed but seen it work ). during highschool guys say forever they mean till i graduate and leave.

again sorry to but in but i figured it would help to let u ladies know btw im only 16 going on 17

A lot of us have already pointed out that even if we are thinking happy thoughts, they are not reflected on our faces! It is the Aspie brain at fault, and not us. We cannot help it. I have found that when I put a fake smile on my face, it looks like a grimace and is rarely reciprocated. :?


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Shishka
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09 Oct 2011, 4:20 am

I work on a cash register and my boss is constantly telling me off for not smiling at the customers. Smiling just isn't something I think about, especially when I'm focused on what I'm doing.



Jweh76
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09 Oct 2011, 2:45 pm

I have this issue too. See my post about mother in law issues in the love and dating forum.

I don't understand people who think that smiling/happy is a baseline. How do you go up from there? What do they do after orgasm or during a really good cup of coffee? sing and dance?

Best of luck; personally I couldn't care less if people think I'm mad. I'd usually prefer to be left alone, so everybody wins.



Meraxes
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19 Oct 2011, 12:24 am

Yes! I have been told this my entire life. It was the worst at my last job, though, because I would rub around with a lot on my mind - just thinking of tasks - and co-workers would constantly ask me what I was so mad about, or what was wrong, or "why do you look like that?"

Definitely annoying. I'm so glad I have finally figured out that I have AS. It all makes so much sense now! :idea:



CheeseDeprived
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22 Oct 2011, 3:44 am

Me too! I'm sure I've put people off by making them think I was mad at them when in fact this is just my "default" facial expression!



pokerface
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23 Oct 2011, 4:17 pm

fragaria wrote:
People always assume that I'm angry but I'm not and it makes me sad.
How can I learn to make a normal, happy face? I cannot wear sunglasses all the time.


People say that to me all the time but it doesn't make me sad. Do you wanna know why? Because I am angry!!
Anger is my middle name. I was an angry child, I am an angry adult and I will probably die as an angry senior citizen. It's what keeps me going. Anger can be a negative thing but it can be turned into a positive energy as well.



Ai_Ling
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23 Oct 2011, 5:10 pm

Shishka wrote:
I work on a cash register and my boss is constantly telling me off for not smiling at the customers. Smiling just isn't something I think about, especially when I'm focused on what I'm doing.


I can relate, I work at the supermarket and sometimes customers think I dont want to be there. Its not that, Im perfectly fine. My fine face is apparently taken the wrong way. And its true, smiling is not something I think about when Im focused on doing something. Its like Im bagging and Im suppose to be making eye contact and smiling?



hartzofspace
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24 Oct 2011, 12:17 pm

I had to have my picture taken for ID purposes, and the person taking the picture asked me to let him know when I was "ready." Slightly surprised, I said to go ahead and take the picture. I braced myself for the unpleasant flash, and then he showed me the picture. He said I looked angry. I guess he wondered why I wasn't grinning like a Jack O'Lantern. :? I really hate having my picture taking, so what is there to smile about, I wonder?


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Annmaria
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26 Oct 2011, 4:59 pm

I am always told that I look angry which is really annoying sometimes I am just preoccupied. Then to annoy me really more I am told to smile because I have a lovely smile.


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tentoedsloth
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26 Oct 2011, 7:09 pm

People ask me, especially about photos, "Can't you smile?" I *can,* but maybe it's the honesty trait--I see nothing particularly delightful about having a photo taken And to imply that a grin is my normal expression would be misrepresentation.

To those who are asked if they are angry, a good comeback would be: "I AM NOW!"



myth
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27 Oct 2011, 6:46 am

Yep I used to get that a lot. Nowadays I get more "You look tired" or "Are you ok?" so I guess I look more melancholy than mad these days :P


I vividly remember one incident in grade school where my mom (who was a teacher at my school) came to me and said that this new girl who I had had absolutely no interaction with went home crying that day because I didn't like her. ???


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Rubydoobs
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27 Oct 2011, 7:40 am

I get this all the time too. I get to screw up my face when I'm reading or thinking.

I smile when I'm happy and I have no problem smiling, but my 'neutral' face seems to look angry.


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