Aspies fit parents?
MAybe... I don't know the statistics. My son wasn't planned. I suppose there must be a fair few undiagnosed aspie parents out there though who had kids young. I must say I really really couldn't handle going through it all now again though. I am pretty glad I had him young. However my mum didn't have me until she was in her thirties and I'm the eldest and she was a wonderful parent too so I suppose it's all a matter of opinion.
oh, please, don't get me wrong. I love my child with all my heart, and I also love many things about motherhood (how simple things become the most wonderful ones...) and that's one of the reasons why not being able to be a WHOLE mom frustrates me. Maybe is beacause as a child I did everything by myself and school was so easy (i have a memory thing) and didn't seek for hugs and kisses I can't relate to what she is needing. Agh, is SO frustrating. I love my girl, I just wnat the best for her.
If you really want a child, and can visualize yourself raising them, then yes. If the father is also AS then you may have a higher chance of having a more severely autistic child. Can you visualize yourself dealing with that?
My son is 25. He is only slightly AS compared to me. I waited until I was 29 to have a child. Before that I was focused on college, then grad school. But I'm not good at multitasking. In retrospect, I'm still not sure if I should have had another one? Two would be nice, when they are older and not around as much. One of the two might visit. But two small children would have made me doubly anxious??? I'll never know. I DO think it would be nice for my son to have a brother or sister. But at the time (even though I was not diagnosed) I "felt" as though one was all I could handle. I was petrified of screwing up such an awesome assignment. I lived many years constantly petrified of screwing up everything and anything.
In retrospect, had I known exactly what was "wrong" (which YOU do), I could have made better, more specific choices in how I related to him. Not that I was a bad mother. But I was probably too nervous and over-anxious. I would have been more relaxed had I known exactly what was wrong, and where I had to make corrections. Instead it always felt like taking a stab in the dark.
My son is a fine young man, holds a job, not a drug addict, no police record, has friends and hobbies.
The father has some influence too, ya know!
I would not be able to raise children. I really wonder how you can do it and admire you for that and wish I could feel I could do the same.
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English is not my native language, so I will very likely do mistakes in writing or understanding. My edits are due to corrections of mistakes, which I sometimes recognize just after submitting a text.
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