Should I read "Aspergirls"?

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I figure out what to do to break some routines that are not productive. But most of all it would be nice to recognize girls with AS in IRL.

I took a look at the book..

Chapters:
00 - Foreword by Liane Holliday Willey. Introduction.
01 - Imagination, Self-taught Reading and Savant Skills, and Unusual Interests.
02 - Why Smart Girls Sometimes Hate School.
03 - Sensory Overload.
04 - Stimming, and What We Do When We're Happy.
05 - On Blame and Internalizing Guilt.
06 - Gender Roles and Identity.
07 - Puberty and Mutism.
08 - Attraction, Dating, Sex, and Relationships.
09 - Friendships and Socializing.
10 - Higher Learning.
11 - Employment and Career.
12 - Marriage and Cohabitation.
13 - Having Children.
14 - Ritual and Routine, Logical and Literal Thinking, Bluntness, Empathy, and Being Misunderstood.
15 - Diagnosis, Misdiagnosis, and Medication.
16 - Depression Meltdowns, PTSD, and More About Meds.
17 - Temper Meltdowns.
18 - Burning Bridges.
19 - Stomach Issues and Autism.
20 - Getting Older on the Spectrum.
21 - On Whether AS is a Disability or a Gift, and Advice from Aspergirls to Aspergirls. Additional Tools for Parents.
22 - Give Your Aspergirl some BALLS: Belief, Acceptance, Love, Like, and Support.
23 - Thoughts and Advice from Parents of Aspergirls.
A0 - Appendix. List of Female Asperger Syndrome Traits.
A1 - Summary of Some Main Female/Male Differences.
R0 - References and Resources.

The look inside feature showed:
* Self interest in reading that develops into an air of intellectual aura
* Good spatial capability with CAD etc, maps? (this should stand out from common females)
* Not get it from others instructions. More effective in self-learning, perhaps reading
* Bill Stllman (2006) believe that AS (girls?) have "Good connection" and spiritial awareness that compensate for their deficits. High intelligence but not always practical.
* fluid inteligence to see order in confusion, draw inferences, see relationships in seemingly unrelated things.
* Not everybody has a "zone passion"
* Slow learning may be due sensory processing difficulties, shutting down due pressure from others, or from being around others.
* Can't impose rules and priorities on others nor research them like books and ask to many questions that makes people feel uncomfortable. (ch1 p22), I find this slightly incomprehensive.
* Having vivid imagination but finding toys boring bits of rigid plastic. Might want to sort them alphabetically etc. And on lookers don't get it when they don't see any physical play.
* Bringing snacks to the room to avoid any breaks in reading.
* Interest in books, music, art, and animals. But with a difference in rapacity and passion they are persued.
* I think this is quite common: The incredible focus and activity is something to be cultivated not discouraged. Something teachers, doctors and educators are beginning to realize as an asset (doh).
* Common: The book author asks if this is a executive dysfunction to not know when to stop or something else. (ch1 p24)
* Common: When in the "zone" having a hard time to break for toilet, eating, drinking, grooming, fresh air, or exercise. Might impinge on other activities like going to work.
* Difference between male/female AS might be that the interest may seem usual and practical to an observer.

(and end of free reading.. at p24 )

www.help4aspergers.com (domain name says help, doesn't have to be so.. )
(Rudy Simons official website)

www.aspie.com
(connect with Liane Holliday Willey.. Aspergergirl extraordinaire)

www.autismahngout.com
(materials about autism/asperger)

www.camillaconnolly.com
(australian artist)

www.grasp.org
(The global and regional asperger syndrome partnership)

www.templegrandin.com
(true pioneer)

Summary from chapter 1: I found the book interesting, but not really OMG, how life changing information! perhaps this is found in the unaccessible chapters?

As mentioned, post diagnosis it probably won't help you, except to help you feel like you're not the only one. Unless, like me, your syndrome manifests apparently like a male with Asperger's. I don't get the depression issues that she dwells on (ad nauseum). It did help with my daughter, however, because she very much does.

It's definitely worth it. She gets it, it all makes so much sense. I like her as well

I had sort of been exploring the notion that AS explains stuff about me, and so I got the book with 'maybe this will clarify the female differences I read about'.

It did that and more!

Perhaps not everything in it is me...(I actually like walking around non-crowded stores and shopping!) but there were other things I do or did that I had never even considered as being part of AS and there she and the other ladies in the book are telling me they all did that too.

I went over the symptom charts at the end with my mom over Thanksgiving just to see if she had insight and or agreed with my self assessment. And mom pointed out some of the ones I said 'weren't me', she corrected me with a 'you used to really have an issue with that and did it all the time!'

Of course she then noticed that a lot of them apply to her as well....


So for those of us trying to figure out as adults if AS answers some of our 'mystery oddness', its a very good and uplifting book.

Way late to this thread, so apologies.

I would also suggest "Songs Of The Gorilla Nation: My Journey Through Autism" by Dawn Prince-Hughes, Ph.D. (can find here on Amazon). It is her autobiography (thus far, at least), but was relatable for me. I really enjoyed the book.

I read it, enjoyed it, and strongly related to it. I've now given it to my parents and told them "this explains everything!"

I found it to be an easy book to read as well. Just something in the tone of it is simple and comforting. At the same time as I bought Aspergirls, I ordered Tony Attwood's Complete Guide To Asperger's Syndrome, and although it is also interesting and informative, it's more medical textbook and I am finding it hard to really 'get into'.

Hope it's all right to post here as I'm a guy and I don't want to invade the space.

But I recently read and loved the book. I very much identified with it. I've been relatively recently diagnosed as an adult (they said it was difficult to pick up, way more home problems than school problems), but none of the online tests fit and I felt rather alienated reading about the male experience. The majority of the "differences" at the end of the book fit for me.

It also allowed me to understand and go beyond forgivness, which happened a while ago, into acceptance of my mom's past behavior, some of which included scary physical violence.

Maybe this belongs in the parenting section, but I feel like we were often unintentionally triggering meltdowns in each other because we are so similar, but just different enough. Even though it took ages, the upshot to this is that we had to put in so much work and effort I feel in some instances we have better skills than the average person that just does enough to get by.

Because ASDs are thought to have a hereditary component I have to wonder how much "difficult kids" are a result of clashes like this. My desire is absolutely not to place blame on parents or mothers, but to say that there is perhaps more room for connection and understanding between parent and child. I feel that connection could be as beneficial as any "fix", treatment, or accommodation in many cases.

Sorry for the long post. Needed somewhere to get it out.

as a follow up...

I also recently finished reading 'Pretending to be normal' by Liane Wiley.

They both have their place, but of the two books I more -personally- identified with Aspergirls.

Just something about how its written perhaps, or that the experiences of all the women she draws on are more like mine. That might mean she simply called on sources much more on the mild side of the spectrum.

It sounds odd, but I think I got the impression that Wiley was writing more to somehow justify every single thing that happens via AS, rather then help others learn, and maybe I didn't enjoy that as much.

The bits about how psychic she is really turned me off the book.

I was good at reading tarot cards, I amazed people often, I see stuff other people don't, but its ordinary stuff like seeing a flicker of a twitch at a certain word mentioned, then running with it.

I miss social cues, but get other stuff people don't even know about, doesn't make me psychic.

I bought it and read it yesterday. While I am obsessively consuming data right now having just come upon this realization about myself, I have to say the book Aspergirls was too anecdotal for me. I wanted more hard data and numbers. It is a fine and easy read but if you are looking for concrete info and data, then you will be left wanting. And, perhaps the data is simply not there to reproduce as the female Aspi is not heavily researched.

For much of my life I felt like I didn't fit in. Many of my attempts at relationships with other people ended in disaster, and it led to anxiety, depression, low self-esteem and a lot of other psychological issues. I'd seen GP after GP, counsellor after counsellor, and no one could pin it down. When I came across a discussion of Asperger's on a forum (not this one) by chance, and was able to relate, I began to do some intense research and came across Aspergirls. The book was a revelation. I'm not alone. There are people out there like me, and it's okay to be that way. It helped me accept myself for who I am and was a key reason why I sought a formal diagnosis.

I agree, my one bugbear was the discussion of "psychic" powers, but I think it was only for a page. It certainly doesn't invalidate the rest of the book. I take what helps me from these kinds of books and leave the rest behind.

I am right there with you RahRah .... reading the book on my Kindle right now and enjoying it. Bought two other Aspie books as well Tony Attwood's book on the "complete guide to Asperger's Syndrome" and "Aspergers Syndrome and Anxiety" ... I am also sampling some others through my Kindle. This is actually the type of book I am happy to keep on my Kindle. I'm taking stock of it all and it's actually like another "coming out" (I'm a happily married Lesbian and that seems to have been the easier one).

So far, I like Aspergirls because it's providing some validation even without the formal diagnosis yet. I'm just eating stuff up right now and trying to navigate. It all makes sense ...

I bought it for my Kindle Fire. I love it as there aren't many books for women with Asperger's Syndrome.

Yes; I purchased this book this week and so far it has been an amazing read; it's content- anecdotes have been so relatable and it's advice very useful...I now feel an incredible sense of belonging and resonance with other Aspergirls.

I've read some of it; to be honest I don't really rate it. I suppose it's because I have more of a 'male presentation' of Asperger's (or so I've been told).

Do you think it's a useful read for families of girls with AS? I really wanna buy it.