Who doesn't want babies?

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I'm an aspie who is also child free. The main reason for that is that I've had so much trouble with job interviews that my employment history has been relatively crappy. I'm the type of person who doesn't want to have children that I couldn't support on my own, as I was actually able to get on SSI because of my Asperger's.

As for now, I'm much happier being an aunt, since at the end of the day, my niece goes home with my brother and SIL.

I decided to be child-free years ago and despite people saying I will change my mind, I still haven't. I have several smaller siblings, so I understand the the amount of work that is required to raise a child. I also don't trust my genetics. I'd much rather just focus on making a career for myself and accomplishing my dreams, like building a rocking gaming rig and traveling. Fortunately, due to me being trans and under hormonal treatment, I'm sterile.

Both of my parents are grandparents now, so it's not like I'm denying them the experience.

I have no interest in having kids whatsoever. I only become more certain of that as I get older. There are several reasons. (1) Kids hit my sensory sensitivities like very few other things can. Babies screaming in supermarkets sound like an air-raid siren. Kids running amok are downright terrifying. (2) When I become overwhelmed, which is regularly, I have moments where I just want the world to go away. I'm worried that with a child I either wouldn't get enough recharge time and end up a depressed mess, or I'd push the child away at unpredictable moments, bewildering and possibly emotionally damaging him or her. I've experienced that from one of my own parents and there's no way in hell I want to do that to another child. (3) Dubious genetics. (4) There are too many humans on the planet already. (5) I just don't think I'd cope. Having a child is too serious a matter to have as many doubts as I do and still go ahead.

I would like just one child. But one thing I have a very low tolerance for pain and I'm afraid of giving birth. And another thing is I won't know what to do when the child gets a vomiting bug. I'm hoping that my motherly instinct will overtake my Emetophobia.

Also I worry about what the child will turn out like. If it has Autism, it will be a handful because the world has to revolve around children with Autism; will have a meltdown if something is too bright or something is too noisy or something isn't laid out right, and the meltdowns are awfully loud and could last hours, right up until the child is feeling less overstimulated.

If it has Asperger's, it will most probably end up having anxiety and depression problems, due to loneliness and bullying at school, which will break my heart because no decent parent wants their child to be unhappy.

If it has ADHD it will either be so out-of-control with behaviour that it would tire me out myself, or might have anxiety with it, which causes an ADHD child to have more tantrums and behave inappropriately.

If it has other things like Mental Retardation, Down's Syndrome, or any other brain disorders then it also makes family life more work than it is for any family.

And if it was born with a physical condition or a disease then I would spend my whole time worrying about it's health, and some physical conditions can mean that the child won't live very long. It's very disheartening for the parents.


Most parents of NT children take everything for granted. My boyfriend does with his three children. Yes all children have their own problems and all parents worry about their children and NT children can bring stress and stuff can happen, etc, but I'd still prefer my child to be a typically developing child.

I decided at the age of 8 that I never wanted babies. I'm much older now and have never wavered.

I have an extremely low pain tolerance.
I am asexual.
I love my freedom too much.
I actually detest (not just dislike) children.

I want to adopt. I'm terrified of pregnancy, but I like kids. They're fun. ^^

I hate it how some people say that women have to reproduce, as a responsibility. That's not a responsibility! It's a personal choice! Ugh.

Annoys me too, Ana. They think that just because you have reproductive mechanism, you must use it.

And I agree on it being choice rather than responsibility. Nobody is obliged to do anything they don't wish to.

I'm definitely a good deal younger than most if not all of you (not sure if my age shows up or not) and shouldn't really be thinking much about this just yet since I'm only in college, but I'm not sure how much I really would want children. Pregnancy and childbirth makes me worried. If it did happen, the kids would probably also be autistic and I really have a hard time relating to most people like that so I could see it being a nightmare overall.

Me! Honestly I can never remember wanting children. I don't like being around them. They're overwhelming. It's so bizarre to me that people tell me I'll change my mind, because 1) I'm not ever inconsistent with what I want and don't want, 2) it's rude, and 3) why would you WANT me to reproduce? I'm not mother material at all.

It's all just very baffling to me.

Well said, Michelle. I only wish there was a 'like' or 'upvote' facility for me to approve your great post.

'You'll change your mind' forsooth! How do others know? They're not you. This presumptuous attitude angers me.

I'd never wanted kids. Never wanted to be pregnant. Never never never. XD

But ironically I do have a kid. She's just not blood related to me. Her father (who constantly claimed to be an aspie--don't know whether he was or not), showed signs of psychopathy. And so my wife, who was the one who had the child with him, left him for good and cut off all connections after finding out she was pregnant with his kid. I was her best friend by that time with some romantic feelings for her, and so I stepped in as surrogate parent holding up the dad's end of raising her child since her father was not allowed to see her. I became Mommy No. 2. And I later on married the child's mom and officially became her second mother.

I'm not against raising kids now. I love kids. I used to hold a couple different jobs in daycare and nurseries tending to babies and toddlers before my daughter was born, but the idea of myself being pregnant is off-putting and anxiety-inducing. I might get some flack for this, but it seems... alien to me. I'm not sure how else to put it. It's weird and creepy in my eyes. XD I suppose I've always had the thought that this is my body and it's not for use of others, no matter who that person is, whether it's to grow a child or something similar. It's not even for material reasons, such as not wanting to look pregnant or get stretch marks. I just don't want a lifeform growing inside me.

My wife and I do want more kids. One or two more, anyway, but if we do, she'll be doing the baby-carrying, and I'll be doing the role of outside support. ^-^