Dealing with other women

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Are we sure we would recognize men competing in any way other than sports?

Hehehehe... Just laughing quietly to myself at the truth and sentiment of the quote. Yes, I've been on the receiving end of this, when a teen myself, and can vouch for its accuracy.

If that was aimed at me, I didn't mean team as in sports and yes I'm very sure they compete just like women.

It's just that I don't see too much competion when I see guys get together.

For example, the many times I've been in bars and barbeques, I see guys sitting getting together and talking or watching TV as if they were a team. Most of the women I see usually either hang with their guys, or get into cliques. When I say cliques I don't put it in a way that's always bad but I feel like there's sort of this competition within them. Like I have to look or be a certain way.

Most of the friends I made were usually guys only cos I felt more relaxed around them with girls. There are some girls who don't put on that pressure to be a certain way.

I'm wondering if it isn't b/c girls are more vocally social. I have trouble in this area when it comes to communication skills plus I feel like everytime I'm around a girl I'm suppose to have a boyfriend or be real upbeat and busy with life. I get more OMG stares and comments from girls than I do guys. Like it's not normal for me to still be single. I even had one girl talk crap behind my back assuming that I was a lesbian. Having aspergers doesn't really help especially when it comes down to a competiont of social hierarchy. In fact, I think I'd fair out better in sports than I would in peer communication.

This is just my own experiences with how I feel around young girls and yes TEENS can very cruel.......

I had a teenage girl spread rumours around that my daughter isn't really mine and I stole her and the reason I am so (can't remember what she put) aspie I guess, is because my mom made me work as a prostitute at 14.
I was a teenager too but she was supposed to be my friend.

Yikes! That's sociopath-level rumor spreading.

I've seen a lot of guys compete within groups by putting each other (or even total strangers passing in the street) down - bringing up embarassing past events, etc. As though they think that diminishing others raises their own status.

I've broken up with two guys because of this; it wasn't aimed at me, but I still find it disgusting.

On the other hand, women seem a little more ready to interpret 'I don't get along with person x,' as 'person x is inherently worth less than people with whom I do get along.' Maybe men are better able to respect their enemies?

Yeah that seems to be the case but i don't understand. One of my boyfriends use to get in alot of fights and was well known for not to get on the wrong side. However, this one fight he was beaten and he spat blood on the guy that did. Instead of getting more angry which is what you would think you would do if some one spat blood on you. They shook hands as the guy that won could see he had a fighting spirit and respected that.

I have got into fight with my sister once and it was getting nasty so her boyfriend held her off me and my boyfriend held me back. She tried to keep fighting but couldn't and I thought why bother you not going to be able to throw any punches anyway. She went back to her place and was crying. I was such in a rage then and she locked the doors and called the cops on me. When men fight they seem to get it over and done with. Women just keep bitchin and bitchin.

Like my other sisters have fought alot. They are either the best of friends or worst of enemies. I can remember my sister was staying with me and my other sister owed her some medication. At the time they didn't like each other much and my other sister who owed her these tablets gave them to her but she found that she had taken the powder out and filled it with sugar and stealing from each other. I have never stole off them but I was borrowed this washing machine out of good will until I could afford to get my own. One day I come back home and it was gone. My sister sold it. She said she didn't but I know she did.

I offend more men than women. Men are just as emotionally irrational as women. Women and men alike get away with anything and everything that people will let them. From my experience male manipulation is by far more violent in nature. Females can be violent, but typically avoid it unless they have a peculiar chemical difference than most females.

It may be hard to stay away from those ladies, you might feel like you have to make the situation as best as it can be. I've learned to fluff my feathers a little bit with drama, and people don't like to f**k with me as often as they did once. The key is to not be irrational yourself, and if you have an overwhelming tendency to want to run and tell everybody that someone is doing something wrong to you, try to remain as calm and logical as possible. It took me forever to figure out how to talk to people about people that I didn't like for my reasons. So, despite their NT opinions, based on over simplistic psychology, if any at all, I took time to really think about (and I mean a long time), my viewpoint. I had to really work at it since I didn't even know what the Spectrum was, and I was just different than my peer group. Not having friends made me a target, as I'm sure is very common.

Men are more aggressive and violent than women this is true but I know women do a hell of alot more bitching. Instead of guys they might get into a fight physically and it is over and done with. Women just keep going on and on. Alot anyway do that. I don't b***h or talk about people behind thier back I can't stand it. I'd much rather use my energy being nice to every one and making friends. Woman who are violent in my experience are not chemically different than other women. It is a behaviour that is learnt.

My experience has been that (NT) women bond through gossip and chit chat. If you can't gossip and chit chat, you are automatically excluded from any social cohesion that might transpire. This then makes you vulnerable to any aggression or frustration the group wants to mete out.

Yes true but that's only because they think your a snake. When they get to know what kind of person they really are they think your beautiful. That is my experience and the one's that don't and keep carrying on are not worth knowing.

it is mostly because men are more direct and women are more indirect. I do very poorly with women who fail to recognize that I don't communicate indirectly. I can tell a guy that I screw up and they need to tell me, and they will. But women seem to expect me to realize that I have offended them, without actually telling me.

So I offend them and they don't say anything and I don't notice and then they hate me.

Yes that is true Shiggly women get in trouble for being as direct. If they have a job where they are in charge and are as direct as a man boss would be; they are hardly respected as much and are often viewed as being the biggest b***h.

That's so pathetic.....don't they have anything better to do? Low IQ hens....

Yes this describes my experiences within groups of girls. I have trouble "cliquing" into who they're talking about much less keep a conversation going. Gossip all comes hand in hand with good and bad. It seems that whether or not the concept of gossip is all bad or not, girls are pretty good observers IMO. Not that all of them like myself are. I have trouble understanding or grasping all the social situations that're going on around me. I can only keep up with one I'm already in. That's not to generalize that all females do is talk about other people but in many females groups it's been the majority of my expreinces.

As for me, I think most of my successful friendships with females were mostly socialized through one on one conversations and activities of interests.

Also I won't argue that I haven't seen guys fight. But in my experiences, the same guys who would get into a serious brawl, became buddies after that. Almost makes me think it's a guy's way of bonding in their social order.....

Also I won't argue that I haven't seen guys fight. But in my experiences, the same guys who would get into a serious brawl, became buddies after that. Almost makes me think it's a guy's way of bonding in their social order..... [/quote]

As long as they don't kill each other in the mean time. I go in a fight with my other sister once and she said if she ever see's me again she will shoot me.

I always hear from NT's that women are nuts, crazy ect.

Maybe it's true, *laugh*. Females are simply too influenced by society and can't look at things objectively as men. Even aspie women, because they try to mimic NT women.

It sucks....I want a women who is smart.