what good is marriage?

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It doesn't matter where you graduate. I would work at McDonalds if I needed food and rent. You don't give McDonalds a resume. You just apply and you don't need to tell them you have a degree.
And I do not have a perfect life. I just take the hard parts with the good parts and I compromise to make it work.
The point is you have apparently unchanging views on marriage and you have never been married. So how would you know what it is like to be married?
And I make no assumptions unless I know. Which is why I placed my status as unknown even though I am currently undergoing evaluation for AS.
You presume I do this for fun? Or the fact that you make wide sweeping assumptions about things you know nothing about and then complain that I apparently do so? Makes no sense.That I am making fun of you because you have AS? There is no connection between my views on your views on marriage and your AS. I would say the same thing to everyone. You can't make assumptions on something you don't know anything about in a particularly inflammatory post and expect that no one can contradict your views because you are different. Everyone here is different.

Last edited by Shiggily on 12 Dec 2008, 7:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

yeah, its not the size or cost of the ceremony. The ceremony is just a day. And I only did the ceremony so my family could celebrate. Its the marriage that counts.

I'm not trying to insult those that are married, I'm just genuinely confused, why a persons marriage has anything to do with anyone else, why people have to invite there family or friends. In my opinion it should be a choice between two people.

I realise it's traditon and carrys on from old days.

But before then people did used to just decide they were married and that was it. It just seems like an excuse for a party to me.

I agree you don't have to spend a ton or even have a wedding. My husband and I eloped. We paid 60$ and the price of rings

I suppose it depends on the family and the reason. I get the reception. I don't necessarily get the ceremony.

My hubby and my children are the only people in the world whom I have been able to look deeply into their eyes. Maybe someday, someone will change your mind.

Don't misunderstand me, I'm not against pledging myself to one person, I'm for it. But for it exactly, pledging myself to him, (or her)I don't see that I need to do it in front of anyone. It's none of their business if you ask me.

I suppose if it was really important to my intended, or his family would be really upset without it then I would do it, but I would hate the entire thing. I just don't like the idea of a bunch of people watching me, I would be focused on that, not my intended, and as the whole point of it is to be about you and the one you love, it would seem so false, I'm afraid that I would come across hesitent or sound like I'm acting or reading outloud when It came to the vows. Then I would be worried that everyone would think I don't really love my partner, and that they'd try to interfere with the marridge.

true, we're all different. still, i don't wanna marry solely because of my own beliefs. besides the meaningless paperwork, the idiotic expenses, etc., i hate wearing white dresses & men are apathetic, two-timing a$$holes. my dad left me and my mom for some other broad when i was 3. after their divorce, he's not done anything for me i found out that he started another family. for all i know, my dad made his current wife a housewife. for me, that's the most degrading & unrewarding position there is. i'll never put myself in such position.

and my father thinks that rape is an acceptable way to punish a child. not all aspies are alike, not all women are alike, not all men are alike. You say we are all different but then in the same breath you assume that all men are alike, all marriages are alike, all weddings are alike, all families are alike.

I don't think you actually believe that there are individual differences

All of those jobs simply do not pay enough to allow someone to live independently! Those people who do such work as a fulltime job tend to live in the public housing and require welfare to pay the rent and foodstamps to get enough to eat. I worked in food service for about a year some 10 years ago and I had to leave because they made me a server and I cant stand to be standing in one place for hours constantly interacting with people.

Marriage is a celebration of a commitment you have to each other and to let everyone else know, share with others that were married cause we really care about each other. If I found some one that was good for me and that I loved, I would love to get married. It would be the most happiest day of my life. It's so romantic. I have or had a boyfriend that I really loved and still to this day I will never forget him. Even though we are not together I will always love him as a friend. He was the best friend I ever had.

You need more than just to love someone to get married. That is the mistake people make. You need to be compatable. Like your beliefs and personalities.

If I found some one so special. I would love them life. That's why I would want to get married and that's so beautiful to love some one so much that you want to spend the rest of your life with them.

A secure relationship as a healthy marriage is very important if you are going to have children because it gives the child a sense of security. Children need both their Mum and Dad.

So what is the point in getting married.. Well to me there is alot of point. It is romantic, it's sacred and two is better than one.

Last edited by Samara on 13 Dec 2008, 5:48 am, edited 1 time in total.

cheap apartment with a few roommates and cheap food. maybe no TV, maybe soup and ramen, maybe a cheap car or public transportation. It can be done.

You'd have to have roomates , otherwise your only option would be public housing. Things just cost too much these days to support oneself completely on minimum wage alone. Its not a question of being to proud to take such lousy jobs, its that they dont pay enough to pay the bills. What about healthcare? What about phone service(gotta be able to communicate with people, no)? I hope you see my point.

You don't have to wear a dress. You don't have to do it in front of people. You don't have to read vows. You don't have to have some big stupid ceremony if you don't want to.

My mom and my father just went to a courthouse one day, and got married. Cost about $50! They were dressed in everyday clothes. They didn't even buy rings!
No expensive honeymoon, no big giant cake. No family, no friends.

Just a man, a woman, their love for each other, a little bit of paperwork, and a judge to make it official.

That is all that is needed.

I would also like to note that my parents then went out to a nice little dinner at a chain restaurant.

Haliphron's got a point. Shiggily, you don't get it, do you? you clearly have no idea what's it like working a minimum wage job. since leaving high school i've had jobs that wasn't enough for me to eat, sleep, and pay rent. so i ended up living with my mom. that's not good at all. and you still think McDonald's is gonna be the answer to solve these problems?! try opening your eyes to see how people on minimum wage live, for Christ's sake! i can't believe you're here (with your 'easy & perfect' life) telling us that life's very easy to live by WHEN IT'S NOT! if you think so yourself, then you're full of s#!t.