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lesbians seem to have it easy compared to me

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garyww
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26 Mar 2009, 11:48 am

I've been called 'half-human' by some here so I can identify with being 'half-gay'.


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ensabah6
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30 Mar 2009, 11:12 pm

millie wrote:
Quote:
ensabah6 wrote:
I'm looking at the thread of lesbians/bisexual, and I am impressed not only how many replied, but claim to be Aspies.

When I read about how many women who are lesbians and bisexual have had relationships and sex,
I'm kinda skeptical that they are on the spectrum, since to be dx as AS, poor social skills
are necessary, and it takes social skills to have sex.


basically - your post is ignorant and it can FRIG OFF.

i especially like the line that says I'm kinda skeptical that they are on the spectrum

I think this shows an incredible lack of insight and a good dose of ignorance. it also ignores the demographics of posters and the fact we are varied and have different traits and presentations. Not to mention different levels of life experience, not to mention the fact quite a number of women on the spectrum have been sexually abused and therefore have been sexualised quite early and may have learned to use it as a means of relating with others BECAUSE of a social skills deficit.

Read Isabelle Henault and get some info into you about sex and AS and women.

no doubt, many who post here are not on the spectrum. But many are.
I am. I am formally diagnosed. I take offence to the OP and your silly line of argument.


Next time I'll post in the adult forum.



Last edited by ensabah6 on 30 Mar 2009, 11:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.

makuranososhi
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30 Mar 2009, 11:23 pm

Or, in a novel concept... it could be that the sort of potential partners that you or other AS males are pursuing are not receptive to you, whereas those within a different subset of sexuality may have different expectations or desired qualities that might be more accepting - as I'm not a lesbian, I can't begin to speak as to any one's particular interests or requirements in a relationship. Difficulty with social skills is commonly identified within those on the spectrum, which makes me question your option to discard it; to grossly generalize regarding the standards of a group of people isn't really palatable to me either. One can choose to accept being alone, to resent it, to find ways to adapt... the choice remains with the individual.


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Spokane_Girl

31 Mar 2009, 3:46 am

ensabah6 wrote:
I'm looking at the thread of lesbians/bisexual, and I am impressed not only how many replied, but claim to be Aspies.

When I read about how many women who are lesbians and bisexual have had relationships and sex,
I'm kinda skeptical that they are on the spectrum, since to be dx as AS, poor social skills
are necessary, and it takes social skills to have sex.



All it takes for an aspie woman to have sex is be very attractive and lot of men are pigs so they go after women to f**k so they will take an aspie chick to f**k her. So there you go, you just have to be a woman and be pretty to get men and they won't care how socially ret*d you are or how weird you are.



Hovis
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31 Mar 2009, 9:49 am

Spokane_Girl wrote:
All it takes for an aspie woman to have sex is be very attractive and lot of men are pigs so they go after women to f**k so they will take an aspie chick to f**k her. So there you go, you just have to be a woman and be pretty to get men and they won't care how socially ret*d you are or how weird you are.


Agree. And I'll even go so far as to add - depending on how desperate the guy is, the woman may not even have to be that attractive. If he's looking for sex, and she looks at least reasonably human and is willing when better-looking girls turn him down, he's probably not likely to say no. She might not get a relationship, but she'll get the sex.



Bluestocking
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31 Mar 2009, 9:54 pm

One of the things I've read often about AS females vs. AS males is regarding sex. Many of the men are discussed as having difficulty starting and maintaining relationships, and often get sexually frustrated because they have a hard time finding relationship/sexual partners. One of the biggest anxieties expressed about Aspie women? That our lack of understanding relationship dynamics make us vulnerable to predatory men, and that we may become promiscuous (I use the term loosely, I disapprove of its use generally) and careless since we have a hard time forming relationships or keeping sexual partners.
I suspect it is this way largely because of how society views men and women's roles in relationships and "courting", men are supposed to be the pursuers, women the "gatekeepers" who allow partners to court them. This may put strain on aspie men who might not know much about approaching the opposite sex and engaging them in small talk and flirtation?

I would like to hear other people's thoughts on this.