Women and Diagnosis

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I'm C at the moment. Was diagnosed with ADHD as a kid, later with depression, too. I've only rarely seen any television since Sesame Street, so I knew nothing about autism/Asperger's until I stumbled across a Wired article a year or so ago. It raised my suspicions, but at first I thought the "difficulties with nonverbal communication" problem didn't apply to me since I read and write very well (doh!).

After reading tons of literature on ASD and forcing myself to do some serious introspecting (which I'm not very good at), it all became clear and I made an appointment with the first psychiatrist I could get an appointment with, thinking it was a slam dunk. I mean, I brought him the diagnosis, right? But he didn't want to hear about my childhood and ultimately decided that I have Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder because I have a husband and friends, thereby disqualifying me from the autism spectrum. At that point, I was so frustrated and confused that it didn't occur to me to explain that my husband is only home for about a week out of the month and my friendships are maintained almost exclusively online.

It's funny, I realized that in the last 10 or 12 years that I've been in college (the student loans are going to kill me, but I suck at actual employment) I've willingly socialized with the people I met there less than ten times, and about half of those were with a professor.

B

I saw a counselor in my early teen years because my mom thought I had problems with depression/anxiety (don't remember really). After the session she privately asked my mom if I had AS. My mom is an OT so she knows about it...she told the counselor no way, and we didn't go back to her. I've researched AS for a few years now. I've asked a couple psychologists and doctors about it and they either don't know anything about it or brush it off. I went to a neuropsych recently who specializes in AS, and he diagnosed me pretty quickly. I got my diagnosis at 19 years old.

I had no problem being diagnosed. But let me preface this by stating that my son had been diagnosed by the same doctor. The stims I have are rocking, spinning, flapping, and head banging and are "classic" stims. The people at the place that diagnosed me observed me rocking several times and in their parental surveys they realized I'm anti social. If my stims were not classic they would have had a harder time diagnosing me but that was the dead give away. That and the zero eye contact and inability to transition in conversation.

I've read two books about women's with Asperger's, and I didn't think either was particularly outstanding.

The first is titled "Asperger's and Girls." I bought that one off Amazon because Tony Atwood was listed as the first author, but it's a collection of short articles. The second, "pretending to be normal," is an autobiography. There are more books out there; these are just the only two I've read so far. There definitely is capacity for more books (and research!) in this area. I think Ruby Simone is supposed to have one coming out this summer?

C

Okay, my heretofore-not-a-diagnosis story is a long one, but I think the details are necessary.

I was constantly being taken to the doctor/counseling/psychiatrists until the age of 15, when I basically faked being okay to get out of having to go, since I no longer trusted them not to make my life a whole lot worse. One social worker was convinced I was being severely abused and would ask me over and over again if I ever got places without knowing where I was or felt like I was watching myself. I think she thought I had split personalities. This went on for months because I didn't really understand the questions. They would ask me how I felt and I would say I didn't know.

After a few years of this, diagnosed with depression by my mom's shrink who had clinical depression himself and diagnosed my mom (probably wrongly) with depression. I remember telling him I didn't feel depressed, just didn't feel anything at all, and both he and my mom were eager to point out these were symptoms of depression. I also told him about my social problems and how my teachers told me I always ruined the group dynamic and caused arguments, which terrified me because I didn't know what I was doing to cause this. His response was that I subconsciously felt so bad about myself that I was "driving everyone away." Kind of sucks that this was in 1995 and if he had kept current maybe he would have heard about AS?

My only other diagnosis has been anxiety, which I got when I was failing out of college. I wanted to be tested for dyscalculia and ADD, having not heard of AS at the time. Unfortunately I couldn't afford it and the people I was seeing seemed convinced that my problems with math/getting stuff done were all in my head. I was keeping up with the work but I had to spend 60 hours a week doing it. When I pointed out how hard it was for me to keep track of reading or keep focused, to the point of reading a single page 8 times in a row, I was told that this was not a real learning disability because people with AD/HD "can't even get through a single sentence and need readers for everything." (I pointed out that this response was conditioned in people with a diagnosis because they know what to say in order to get services, and after that the guy hated me and I somehow think he thought I was borderline. lol)

Having heard about AS from the "Aspie quiz," I was pretty much immediately sure I had it. I can test positive on any number of tests for personality/psych/neuro disorders, (Depression: do you feel sad a lot? do you feel very sad a lot? Seriously?!) but no diagnostic test I had taken before that even had questions that were relevant to what I experience. I tried to get an AS diagnosis in early 2009, the first and last time I overestimated the intelligence of someone in the psych field. The guy I saw was a moron who laughed at me and told me my problem was I had been socially promoted in school (I was in a gifted acceleration program so I could still fail math for several years and be at grade level, he was not able to grasp this). He said my complete lack of eye contact, which I was almost fired from a job for, could have been due to other factors and there wasn't enough evidence of AS to test me (really I think it was because I didn't have insurance and he didn't know if he was gonna get paid), and tried to charge me $200 for basically equivocating and throwing me out of his office. I tried a few people for referrals but no one came up with someone who looks trustworthy -- I am basically doctor shopping for the sure shot in case I ever get the cash.

I now have been unemployed long enough that there is no money even on my credit card and I have no insurance, and I have been forced to move across country to live with relatives in another place that is considered a wasteland for AS diagnosis. Anyhow, I'm not able to converse with strangers these days without severe panic/anxiety. So, no plans in the works.

Surprised this thread is not longer. Is everyone else an A???

My answer is "C" I have been bounced around to different shrinks since I was a little girl. I have pretty much heard everything BUT Aspergers. I've been diagnosed as normal (highly unlikely since I had few friends, & hated doing typical girlish stuff). I loved being a tomboy & being active. I have also heard bipolar, & PTSD. I had one woman tell me there was something "off" about me but she couldn't put her finger on it. I am still looking to get a diagnosis.

I was unofficially diagnosed at my son's diagnosis. However when I was small my mother took me to the doctors with obvious 'symptoms' of Aspergers and the doctor told her that I would 'grow out of it'. I was then taken into hospital for brain investigations and they found abnormalities in my brain but could not say what it was. They told my mother to go home and not to worry because it was not life threatening. I have had many episodes in my life that were obviously to do with Aspergers but no one ever diagnosed me despite having pschotherapy, medication (which never worked) and various counsellors. As soon as I realised where many of my problems originated from, I was able to educate myself about how to solve them. I asked my son's child psychologist why I had not been diagnosed and she said it was probably because of my intelligence and the fact that I generally 'function' well. My Aspergers is not immediately obvious but I do some very strange things and have really struggled with my emotions. I tend to keep my feelings and thoughts to myself. I suppose the reason is because I 'fit in to society' better. I think maybe now that, we as a society, are more accepting of differences generally and I am becoming more accepting of who I am, talking about the difficulties, I and others have, is becoming easier. I hope that this continues to move in the right direction. If it does then maybe we will no longer be seen by NT's as 'wierd' but instead will be helped through our difficulties and recognised for our talents. I hate the thought of genetically breeding out our 'bad genes'. People with Aspergers are special and make extraordinary steps in the progress of the world. Without Autism the world would be a very 'average' dull place.

Hmmm.....

C?

Hmm, difficult to explain my family, but I'll try.
My parents would never have dreamed of taking me to a doctor, because I'm a girl. So obviously, that's a big impairment.

They new I was different than their 6 kids, but they just tried much. much harder to make me normal. They thought I was misbehaving. Or that I was shy. Or a tomboy. Ya know?
Now that I am old enough to make my own money, and go see a doctor... I have never went, because... well... It's been very difficult for me to hold down a job.

I know I have Asperger's, Dyspraxia and dysgraphia, and I suspect I have dyscalculia.
(Heck, I tried working at a gas station, and we had to count how many cigarette packs there were, and I could barely count past 10... I had to start over.)

I have tried very much to have a job, but I have been mostly living off my fiance
So I can't afford to go see a doctor, much less get a diagnosis.

So it is a vicious cycle.

Earlier someone was trying to convince me to seek out an official AS diagnosis (from someone official, and not just my friends and family that go "DUH!" and see it in me even when I don't). But you've all reminded me why I (still) won't. If "diagnosis" can be so half-(reared) and set you up for things (including ways of seeing yourself, being seen, and "treatments") that have nothing to do with the real you, I'd rather see a witch doctor. At least the chicken feathers and rat heads would be more honest than the fads and half-baked "science" so many in psychiatry and psychology are demonstrating with such eagerness and ease...

for me it took 2 tries to get diagnosed... I think it was easier because I was living in a large city where there were more AS specialists. The only problem is that they tend to be paediatric specialists, so I came off feeling like they viewed me like I was a child. But I gues I houldnt complain as I managed to get diagnosed.

I dont think I had the problems getting diagnosed as some AS females. I think they can be mistaken for shy NT females by the shrink. Whereas I am oafish and hyperactive, so it was easier for them to see the traits. I think perhaps my presentation is not unlike what they may have seen in some males. But a lot of women have a presentation of symptoms quite different than AS men.

I wasn't looking for a diagnosis, just trying to get my child help for problems with school, grades going down, felt it was more than just not being motivated. The psychologist noticed that I displayed similar traits to other patients they had who were AS. I was actually caught off guard, I'd not paid much attention to and didn't know much about Asperger's prior to this. I've learned a lot in a short period of time.

Probably a B.

Definitely B as I was finally diagnosed when I was 28, but when I read something about Asperger's, I realized that I fit a lot of the description. I even ran into a former therapist after my diagnosis, and when I mentioned it, she agreed with the diagnosis.

Probably something between A and B.
I had to tell my parents first that I suspected to have AS, they made an appointment with some kind of specialist, and they (the people at the specialist not my parents) diagnosed me with it. The woman who diagnosed me said I present as a very classical aspie but would be able to function well in normal life due to high intelligence. One thing that was a clear sign for her was that I told her that I realized that other people have feelings to when I was around 11 years old. Well, intelectually I knew it before, but never emotionally oder intuitive.

Definitely A. When I was diagnosed about a month ago, I had no clue what Asperger's was. Once I got the unexpected diagnosis events that had happened in my life made a lot more sense.

D) Category, although I'm 90% sure I could get an AS diagnosis right now, with the obsessive behaviors I've been displaying and how much I've been locked inside of my own mind, and the existing ADHD. Psychs have always told me that I can focus too intensely to have ADHD anyway, but this is really only true about half of the time. Never had the label removed, IDK if they even do that.

I may try in the future, though. It's something I nay need to put on the back burner for awhile. I am almost positive I have AS but when I focus on it too much the behaviors become more apparent. I need to focus on school for the next few years. Learning about AS lately has explained SO much though. I thought I was just a lost cause, never had any explanation for some things. I do wish there was some definitive test though, because I'd really like to know how likely it is that I could pass this on to a child. I would have no reservations about having an Aspie child, I'd just like to know if it's even a possibility r not and how likely I may be to have a low0functioning autistic child. I also worry about telling a future husband about that, wondering if it's something I should even bring up.

Last edited by MotownDangerPants on 14 Jun 2010, 4:48 am, edited 1 time in total.