Female aspies who were loathed as teenagers?

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This made me LOL. I think you probably take things a little too seriously. Do you mean guys were nasty to you through Xbox Live or something?

It took me a really long time until I could say that I did somewhat fit in but this is due more to poor communication skills, not understanding people, not know where my boundaries where. I didnt fit in with either gender for my teen years. Now in college, fitting in is much easier now that have a lot of social skills down. I generally like gender nuetral people the best. Im not interested in things terribly feminine nor masculine. I have personality traits from both genders.

I never fit in school, high school being the worst. I was very pretty, dressed appropriately, was desperate for friends, and wondered why the boys didn't talk to me. Many years later I've been told I acted as though I was a snob. I had AS and didn't know it.

My best year was the one year I spent away from home, in college. I had the three best guy friends a girl could have. They were always very respectful, and thoughtful toward me. Unfortunately I ruined it by getting married and staying that way for 20 years....Got out of that and a year later got in another bad long-term relationship (6 years) just now untangling from that.

So now I have a chance to start over and hope I make better decisions.

High school was the worst. Even though I hung out with a fairly big group of girls, I still managed not to get invited to parties or events. They would talk about it when they got back to school and I would hear what a great time they had without me. A bit depressing to say the least. However today I have better communication skills and I understand people a little better. I prefer the company of boys, I feel they are more direct about what they have to say and they have more interests that are similar to mine. I'm also a gamer too.

Last edited by Ashuahhe on 02 Feb 2011, 8:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I've never fit in. As a child, my peers would ridicule me. They called me stupid, ugly, and would steal my stuff and throw it all in the trash.

As a teen, I wasn't girlie enough to be deemed pretty. That, and the fact that I was very quiet and wore mostly black is why I didn't fit in well. I was bullied by people that had a problem with me being bisexual, called all kinds of weird names for wearing a lot of black, and told by numerous classmates they were waiting for the day I would 'go Columbine' on the school.

As an adult... Gah...

I can't keep a friend to save my life. People often stare at me in public like I'm some freak show. I still don't know how to relate to my peers.

I feel much the same as many women in this discussion. In elementary school, I would wear dresses up until about second grade, and then traded them in for pants most of the time. I read on the playground most of the time and got bullied big time for that, along with my obsession with cooking and cookbooks. Girls would actively seek to make my life purgatory on earth. Worse, my parents tried to blame me, saying I was actively trying to be different, and attempted to ban me from reading during recess.
In middle school, my gender identity kind of went into flux. I wasn't sure if I wanted to be a woman, had my hair cut in a Harry Potter looking cut, the whole nine yards. The kids would tell me that the only place suitable for me was a hospital. I got really depressed and hated life.
In high school, after a principal mistook me for a boy because I was wearing boys' clothes and had my hair so short, I decided it was time to grow my hair. However, I didn't start wearing girls' clothing until the next year. I tried playing soccer with the boys, but they found more fun in hitting me in the face with the ball, watching my glasses fall off but seeing me still standing. After a year and a half at that high school, I transferred to a public school.
At the public high school, I tried to fit in, wearing different hair implements and styling my makeup. After a semester of that, I gave up; I wanted to be simple, not have to worry about that stuff. After I did that, rumors flew that I was a lesbian and my NT sister said that she heard people in the halls say that I was too ugly to be out in public without makeup.
In college, I made a couple friends, but never stayed in touch with them. Now, I pretty much just hang out with my husband, who was my high school sweetheart and my only form of a social life through high school and college. Occasionally, my youngest sister, one of the few girls I get along with (probably because she is a blond version of me), talks to me.

I would wear a dress maybe twice a year (once for my birthday, once for class photos) but always pants the rest of the time. I would spend recess in the library if I could get away with it. In third grade, I met a boy who, to this day, is like my brother. We got along from the start and still stay in touch. He was considered "weird" too.

To this day, I dislike makeup and usually dress casually. I try to "clean up" every now and then, but am still more comfortable in oversized jeans and tees/sweats. Sometimes, people still look at me like I'm a weirdo because of that.

I had a terrible time as a teenager. I was spotty, nerdy and did not care about my apperance. It took awhile before I started to care. People made horrible comments about me and called me nasty things as I did not fit in with the other girls. Was not nice and I am so pleased that puberty is over!

I was bullied terribly at high school (aged between 11-15) Had a bad experience with a guy and he told some lies about me. I was harrassed constantly. Had no real friends at school, they all went to a different school. I was, and still am a mouthy b***h. I kept retaliating, and that made things so much worse.

I ended up leaving school at 15 with no qualifications

I survived grade school but Junior High the clicks developed and I had a small group of acquaintances but that ended when I wanted to include someone else of a different race. Then a girl tried to publicly humiliate me during a fire drill but I remained indifferent after several of her remarks thank goodness and the other kids started looking at her more queer than at me and then she finally stopped.

During the summer I hung out with my younger brother and his friends while we were in this youth program they set-up for the community kids. I tried to hang with some girls but they kept acting so stupid when boys came around I got sick of it and went to hang with my brother and had so much more fun. The girls got jealous and started to harass me and then tried to corner me in the locker room when we visited a pool. They were younger and I just tried to ignore it.

High school I was pretty much invisible. I only remember a couple incidents like when a teacher was making fun of the way I walked. I had no idea that I walked that way. My sister thought I was gay because I had no boyfriend in high school. I had crushes but never acted on them. I preferred comfort over fashion but did at least manage to fix my hair. My dad disliked that I didn't tie my shoes most of the time. I would pull them just tight enough and tie little knots where the shoe lace would stick out on the sides. When I did attempt to fit in which thankfully was rare, it never seemed like things were normal. I went to Prom and had a beautiful dress (which sadly got lost) and a handsome date who learned to dance just for the occasion. I was mean to him after, cause he wanted to get so drunk and I didn't find abandoning my senses appealing (at that time anyway). I played some sports but I didn't care much for math and the math teacher also coached volleyball so she saw I never made varsity. I survived, it could of been worse but I'm not one of those who cherish those times.

I've experienced that, and I think the worst year for me was the 7th grade, as it was then the start of junior high/middle school. My family moved right at the end of that school year, so I got to go to a new middle school in the 8th grade, then attend a different high school which was actually the cross-town rival of where those who hated me ended up attending. Then, some people hated me when they realized my mom was their English teacher at another middle school. Those who hated me for that reason were the ones who were slackers in her classes who never did any work. My mom was the type of teacher who if someone did all of the work, they got higher grades. Many of those who hated me also slacked off in high school, so it was amazing they graduated at all.

I did have some friends in high school who were also in the band, so we weren't among the popular cliques to begin with. That was fine with me since I wasn't interested in smoking pot or getting drunk like many "popular" people were.

I never fitted in with girls. I didnt do "emulation" as I didnt see why I should have to change to be like anyone else.

Thankfully grunge kicked into style just as I was in my final years of high school so I suddenly looked the part after years of ridicule. IT made my final years a little easier.

In adulthood I discovered that noone disliked me at highschool they just didnt "get" me. Interesting looking back now. Would love to find out more but dont want to interrogate people about something that happened 20+ years ago.

I went to an all girls school and it was horrible. They were mean to me the whole time. I wanted to be dead the whole of my teenage years. They would do stuff like push my desk into one corner and then squeeze all the others as far as possible into the opposite corner because they said I smelt so bad. I spent the whole time alone. It still hurts today 20+ years later.

Women/girls especially can be so mean at times.. I was very invicible as a child/teenager, I prefered to sit in a corner and read books during the breaks when other students were socializing. I've always been bullied: I dressed up wrong, I was clumsy, I used to have bad acne, I had wrong interests etc. and got mocked a lot for those. My self-esteem was at zero. High school wasn't quite as depressing, though, because I made my way to an "elite" school where majority of students were smart, mature and had eccentric interests. I had some very good friends there.

University has actually been the worst for me so far. I look a bit different nowadays: I'm a slender/curvaceous blonde, do some modelling, wear pencil skirts, high heels, corsets and feminine classy clothing. I spent a semester in China as an exchange student last autumn: I can't recall ever having had as much attention from men and ever been hated as much as I was by the other international female students during those months. After a lot of badmouthing behind my back, I was later attacked by this clique of girls and shut into a small room with them for two hours against my will, having them aggressively shouting at me and calling me by names from all directions. I got into a complete meltdown and they only got more excited about that. They would continue by bullying me about my background as a rape victim and tell me how I made that happen by myself cause I am "ret*d" and deserved every moment of it. As if that wasn't enough, the next day they went to tell my best local friend that I had told these girls that he had raped me and suspected him for some criminal activities. Later they would go to all the other international students and spread similar vicious stories about me. My friend stood by my side, eventually these girls got so aggressive that we had to go to the police.

Only two days ago I had another event of a couple of women attacking on me and slandering me. My problem is that I don't really have a safety net of close people to defend me when a clique of people decides they don't like me. I am nice, I am polite, I try to be considerate towards others, but apparently I'm never "right type".

I'm so sorry about that Lilya. My college experience bears some similarities. The girls that I got close were incredibly bitchy towards me and the guys I would hang around with would constantly insult me without any regard for my feelings and then they try and make me the bad guy when I get angry at them. My best friend at college was briefly engaged to a guy and alot of messed s**t went down, I got blamed and the friend never came to my aid. It's too detailed a story to go into.

High school was okay. The only people I had difficulty with was the theater people. I tried my best in that department but I still managed to piss them off with my complete incompetence.

Middle School was pretty bad, the girls I hung around with weren't even the pretty popular girls but rather the nerdy unpopular girls and boy did they ever treated me like crap.

I fit in until second grade, when I was seven. Before that, I was just odd, a little out there and weird. Once I hit second grade, I was teased really badly up until my senior year of highschool. In 11th and 12th, I was nearly mute and never bugged anyone, so they mostly left me alone. Middle school was absolute hell and it didn't get any better after I was diagnosed at the end of sixth grade - they just put me in a classroom with other AS kids, mostly boys, who were severely dysfunctional while I was only mildly impaired. Actually, that class is what made me "normal", but not because of what any of the teachers or aids did. It made me hate being grouped in with the other AS/autistic kids so much because I got teased more for it that I made myself act normally to get out of the classes and be almost totally mainstreamed again. There were a few bright spots, a few nice kids. In seventh grade, I was partially in a mainstream homeroom and at the end of the year I forgot my yearbook in it. I came back to get it later and found that everyone had signed it and there were no mean comments.

The worst teasing was in elementary school, where everyone ganged up on me since I reacted so much. I had people putting things in my shoes on the bus, stealing my lunch, hitting me with pencils and making sure they went after me first in every group game I was in. I still have trust issues because of some girls in elementary school who would pretend to be my friend just to get me to say or do something stupid, then laugh at me.

College so far hasn't had any issues with teasing. I don't really talk to anyone on campus and the few people I do are very nice. Most of my social interaction comes from the gaming groups and munches I attend. The most bullying I've dealt with here was from a friend's girlfriend who didn't like me, and she was way older than me, in her forties.