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nana80
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25 Nov 2011, 9:21 am

A position that I find nice and cozy is I ly on my bed, he lies on his side below my legs. It doesnt go on the hips, we can look in each others eyes. And doggystyle can be done only by a man with very short private. all others are hurting me.



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25 Nov 2011, 12:41 pm

If there's a position you enjoy and the one that's comfortable and pain-free, use it! Nothing wrong about having your fav position.



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25 Nov 2011, 4:58 pm

Some purely physiological things to take into account, besides lubrication:
Latex/ spermicide sensitivity. I can't handle some OTC products. Also, I thought that I must have PID because I was too 'tight' and sensitive until an OB told me that the majority of woman who complain of PID-like symptoms are using Always pads. At the time, I was. I switched to organic tampons and the symptoms vanished immediately. I haven't had painful sex, since (except the good kind).



blackberryplum
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06 Dec 2011, 2:03 am

It is very uncomfortable. I am terrified of my husband b/c he gets n a rage when I don't submit. I submit for my kids because we need a home and they need a father. I have gone to gyno and they can't find anything wrong. The Dr. prescribed me progesterone but the scary side effects scare me from using. I did try for a week but I did not see any difference in the pain. It seems that my husband finds the most uncomfortable spot inside of me and gets turned on. Sometimes he hits my ovaries and I am in such pain I can't even scream. I have to stay with him b/c I have nothing else in the world. I have to give my kids a home. I wish I could go to the dr and they could insert something that kills all feeling in my parts. My husband feels like he is owed this no matter how many times I beg to stop. He says I am lyin. I don't know if I am imagining and putting blame on him b/c I am messed up in the head

I don't know how to trust what I feel and know. I guess I am lucky to even exist.

If anyone knows of anything I can use to numb my southern region let me know. I have to stay strong for my kids no matter what.



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06 Dec 2011, 5:28 am

blackberryplum wrote:
It is very uncomfortable. I am terrified of my husband b/c he gets n a rage when I don't submit. I submit for my kids because we need a home and they need a father. I have gone to gyno and they can't find anything wrong. The Dr. prescribed me progesterone but the scary side effects scare me from using. I did try for a week but I did not see any difference in the pain. It seems that my husband finds the most uncomfortable spot inside of me and gets turned on. Sometimes he hits my ovaries and I am in such pain I can't even scream. I have to stay with him b/c I have nothing else in the world. I have to give my kids a home. I wish I could go to the dr and they could insert something that kills all feeling in my parts. My husband feels like he is owed this no matter how many times I beg to stop. He says I am lyin. I don't know if I am imagining and putting blame on him b/c I am messed up in the head

I don't know how to trust what I feel and know. I guess I am lucky to even exist.

If anyone knows of anything I can use to numb my southern region let me know. I have to stay strong for my kids no matter what.

Yikes. You are being abused both physically and emotionally. It sounds like he's convinced you that you are powerless. I think there must be an organization that can help you with shelter and support on how to start a life away from him. I wish you well. *virtual hugs*


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06 Dec 2011, 2:34 pm

blackberryplum wrote:
It is very uncomfortable. I am terrified of my husband b/c he gets n a rage when I don't submit. I submit for my kids because we need a home and they need a father. I have gone to gyno and they can't find anything wrong. The Dr. prescribed me progesterone but the scary side effects scare me from using. I did try for a week but I did not see any difference in the pain. It seems that my husband finds the most uncomfortable spot inside of me and gets turned on. Sometimes he hits my ovaries and I am in such pain I can't even scream. I have to stay with him b/c I have nothing else in the world. I have to give my kids a home. I wish I could go to the dr and they could insert something that kills all feeling in my parts. My husband feels like he is owed this no matter how many times I beg to stop. He says I am lyin. I don't know if I am imagining and putting blame on him b/c I am messed up in the head

I don't know how to trust what I feel and know. I guess I am lucky to even exist.

If anyone knows of anything I can use to numb my southern region let me know. I have to stay strong for my kids no matter what.


I am so sorry to hear your tale. sounds like awful abuse. Please take care. You deserve better than to be hurt. I have nothing to offer really but a hug over the internet.x



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22 Dec 2011, 2:00 pm

blackberryplum wrote:
It is very uncomfortable. I am terrified of my husband b/c he gets n a rage when I don't submit. I submit for my kids because we need a home and they need a father. I have gone to gyno and they can't find anything wrong. The Dr. prescribed me progesterone but the scary side effects scare me from using. I did try for a week but I did not see any difference in the pain. It seems that my husband finds the most uncomfortable spot inside of me and gets turned on. Sometimes he hits my ovaries and I am in such pain I can't even scream. I have to stay with him b/c I have nothing else in the world. I have to give my kids a home. I wish I could go to the dr and they could insert something that kills all feeling in my parts. My husband feels like he is owed this no matter how many times I beg to stop. He says I am lyin. I don't know if I am imagining and putting blame on him b/c I am messed up in the head

I don't know how to trust what I feel and know. I guess I am lucky to even exist.

If anyone knows of anything I can use to numb my southern region let me know. I have to stay strong for my kids no matter what.


I'm pretty sure it's physically impossible for the penis to strike the ovaries during intercourse. The vagina is around a foot long, after which lies the cervix, which leads into the uterus. The uterus is a certain size, I forgot how big, but I'm pretty sure it's larger than the vagina. At the top of the uterus lie the fallopian tubes, which are a few inches long, I think, and thiner than a pencil. The ovaries are on top of the ends of those. I don't think there is anyway they can be reached. Sorry going into that, I get obsessed over the details. Anyway I don't have any advice to give, but I hope things get better for you and your husband.


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22 Dec 2011, 2:14 pm

Ganondox wrote:
blackberryplum wrote:
It is very uncomfortable. I am terrified of my husband b/c he gets n a rage when I don't submit. I submit for my kids because we need a home and they need a father. I have gone to gyno and they can't find anything wrong. The Dr. prescribed me progesterone but the scary side effects scare me from using. I did try for a week but I did not see any difference in the pain. It seems that my husband finds the most uncomfortable spot inside of me and gets turned on. Sometimes he hits my ovaries and I am in such pain I can't even scream. I have to stay with him b/c I have nothing else in the world. I have to give my kids a home. I wish I could go to the dr and they could insert something that kills all feeling in my parts. My husband feels like he is owed this no matter how many times I beg to stop. He says I am lyin. I don't know if I am imagining and putting blame on him b/c I am messed up in the head

I don't know how to trust what I feel and know. I guess I am lucky to even exist.

If anyone knows of anything I can use to numb my southern region let me know. I have to stay strong for my kids no matter what.


I'm pretty sure it's physically impossible for the penis to strike the ovaries during intercourse. The vagina is around a foot long, after which lies the cervix, which leads into the uterus. The uterus is a certain size, I forgot how big, but I'm pretty sure it's larger than the vagina. At the top of the uterus lie the fallopian tubes, which are a few inches long, I think, and thiner than a pencil. The ovaries are on top of the ends of those. I don't think there is anyway they can be reached. Sorry going into that, I get obsessed over the details. Anyway I don't have any advice to give, but I hope things get better for you and your husband.


Unless you are an equine, there is no way on this earth that your vagina is a foot long. That being said, the rest of this is fairly accurate (except the unpregnant uterus is the size of a small pear, not bigger than a foot long). There's no way your ovaries can be touched by a penis during sex. You may be describing the pain of having the cervix hit in the wrong way.



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22 Dec 2011, 9:45 pm

I don't have vagina, I'm male, I was just browsing this forum for the same reason I sometimes browse the Parents Forum and the LGBT Forum, to get a bit of perspective from all sorts of people on or related to the spectrum, and seeing if there was time were it might be appropriate for me to post.

That being said I was never really good with the size of the internal organs, and got that figure that the leghth of the vagina was around a foot from a health teacher. I just assumed the uterus was larger than the vagina as it looks bigger in all the different diagrams. I guess what you said makes a lot more sense.


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yayjess
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22 Dec 2011, 10:17 pm

Noodle89 wrote:
Just wondering if any other girl has never had pain free sex? I was a virgin until I was 18. It was kind of a secret because my family knows I don't just go off and have sex. Everyone says that the first time sucks but the second time is always better. The second time I did it it felt like i lost my virginity a second time! IKve only had sex with 4 different guys and all of it was painful. I always had to stop a few minutes later... I'm wondering if this has anything to do with me being hypersensitive.

Does anyone else have this problem??


I find that my hypersensitivity is actually a great thing. The men thoroughly enjoy their time with me. I don't like it unless I do feel pain though, so maybe that is why I enjoy it so much.



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23 Dec 2011, 12:21 am

blackberryplum wrote:
It is very uncomfortable. I am terrified of my husband b/c he gets n a rage when I don't submit. I submit for my kids because we need a home and they need a father. I have gone to gyno and they can't find anything wrong. The Dr. prescribed me progesterone but the scary side effects scare me from using. I did try for a week but I did not see any difference in the pain. It seems that my husband finds the most uncomfortable spot inside of me and gets turned on. Sometimes he hits my ovaries and I am in such pain I can't even scream. I have to stay with him b/c I have nothing else in the world. I have to give my kids a home. I wish I could go to the dr and they could insert something that kills all feeling in my parts. My husband feels like he is owed this no matter how many times I beg to stop. He says I am lyin. I don't know if I am imagining and putting blame on him b/c I am messed up in the head

I don't know how to trust what I feel and know. I guess I am lucky to even exist.

If anyone knows of anything I can use to numb my southern region let me know. I have to stay strong for my kids no matter what.


The problem is that he doesn't care about you enough not to cause you pain. You deserve to be happy in life - you don't have to feel lucky for living in an abusive situation. Did you tell the doctor this? I am pretty sure any doctor who cares at all about the physical and mental well-being of their patients will understand that the issue is not sexual dysfunction but an abusive relationship... is it possible for you to just tell them what you've written here or even print it out and hand it to them (if you are anything like me you might not get around to expressing the things you really want to when you have the chance)? I think they could help you get out of your abusive situation...



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27 Dec 2011, 5:59 pm

It has always been painful for me.



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30 Dec 2011, 3:28 pm

i used to have this problem. was very painful for a while. took quite a few times but it hurt less and less and then stopped hurting. don't remember how many times, though, but more than four, that's for sure.
oh, and the pep smear hurts a lot, by the way, and everyone says it doesn't. really, this is annoying!
aspies are super sensitive to some pain and numb to others.



factotum666
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22 Jan 2012, 5:33 am

OK ... we are all different. We really are. I only remember having real pain once when my teeth shifted after I had braces put on. And I have had some pretty painful situations, cuting off a thumb with a saw, sking into a tree, getting shot. You know, the usual boy stuff. :) Yes I am a boy. Of course, the lack of pain immediately after the trauma may have been shock, but after sking into the tree, I skied on an injured swolen leg for three days. The point is, that I am not sure how strong the aspi - pain thing is.

Back to the point. Do research. Sex should not involve pain unless you enjoy pain. And you should want and enjoy sex. You may wish to visit http://doubleclickheaven.com, or http://clitical.com.

Also have a complete physical. If none of this helps, get another physical from a different doctor. Have a blood workup, to see if all your chemicals are good. What is a toxic level for some people is a necessary level for others. I need 75 mg of zinc a day to keep my skin from rotting. My blood work shows a perfectly middle of the normal range for my zinc levels, but 75 mg a day is considered long term toxic. You may have some special sensitivities that throw off your chemistry or hormones, and may need to experiment. Try riding your diet of processed foods, and fructose. Experiment with different things that might affect your hormones etc. It may take time, but you are kind of stuck with your body, and if a change of diet works, then that is better than pills and/or an absent or painful sex life yes?


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justalouise
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22 Jan 2012, 8:02 pm

I had to have regular sex for about 6 months before it stopped hurting altogether.

Like some other people have said, it's definitely important to be fully aroused and lubricated ahead of time. Also, I find that the friction from sex rubs me sorta raw after a while--I usually don't like having actual penetration for more than 15 or 20 minutes, so I do lots of other stuff too. Sex is so much more than "P-in-V"!

Oh, and someone said something about it not being as good if you don't love your partner. That must definitely be different for everyone, because I've slept with quite a few people, only 2 or 3 of which I would say I was in love with to any degree beyond friendship. And the majority of the time, it was a ton of fun and super hot!



tabby676
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22 Jan 2012, 9:43 pm

Sex was painful for me for a while, and it still can be on occasion, (though this is quite rare now).
causes of pain for me:
1. not being fully lubricated (solution: more foreplay and/or lube)
2. not being relaxed (solution: taking it slow till I got more comfortable with it, taking control, staying "present")
3. having piv sex WAY too much (solution: having PIV sex less)
4. latex sensitivity (solution: different BC methods)
5. spermicide sensitivity (solution: avoided spermicide)
6. uncomfortable angle/position (solution: change angle/position)
7. difficulty with pelvic floor muscle spasms/control (solution: fun factory smart balls)