To the males who keep posting in Women's Disscussion

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linatet
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02 Apr 2014, 11:20 am

Opi wrote:

for what it's worth, i think it's impossible to enforce any kind of "women only" access. if they tied access to profile, all some troll needs to do is create an account that identifies him as female. nobody is doing a DNA test.

why would someone do this?

But even if there is no guarantee of privacy on the internet, it is a different thing politely asking the males not to make jokes and inappropriate interruptions on delicate women's only discussions.

GivePeaceAChance
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02 Apr 2014, 11:39 am

linatet wrote:

Opi wrote:

1 ) chromosomes do not determine gender

B ) we have asked them to be nicer and they only got mad about it

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Yuzu
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02 Apr 2014, 11:51 am

leafplant wrote:

A lot of the posters on WP are the same dozen people who just keep changing their accounts when they start to feel like they've outstayed their welcome as a known identity.

I suspected as much. People are so weird.

GiantHockeyFan
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02 Apr 2014, 12:09 pm

I personally find myself spending far more time than I expected here for two reasons:

1) I have actively seeking a girl for a serious relationship and would like to identify what issues/differences she might have. I am interested in hearing about things like PMS, periods, etc because my parents never talked about them and I was rejected by girls in grade school. I was a very late bloomer and even had to have someone explain what exactly a vagina was... as an adult :oops: I do try to be respectful and have been trying to unlearn all the negative opinions I have of girls thanks to online dating and the corresponding nasty, arrogant profiles. It never struck me my date might have been more nervous that I if I hadn't read this section.

2) As I recently worked up the courage and posted, I feel like I can communicate and have a discussion better with Women than Men and always wanted to spend my school recesses around the girls (they didn't feel the same). All of my favourite WP posters are female and I am a highly emotional, sensitive male who cries far more than he will ever admit publicly! I appreciate the beauty of the female body (and do not watch porn period) and thanks to being here have realized my remarks to 'beautiful' women about their bodies were unintentionally seen as sexual in nature.

I've also posted in the LGBT and Adolescent forums before because as a straight adult male that was the best place I could put my discussion.

linatet
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02 Apr 2014, 12:14 pm

Yuzu wrote:

leafplant wrote:

A lot of the posters on WP are the same dozen people who just keep changing their accounts when they start to feel like they've outstayed their welcome as a known identity.

I suspected as much. People are so weird.

Really? Leafplant, do you have any evidence about that? I have no idea why someone would create many accounts and pretend they are different people.
like, some users I think are people are actually not people but created people by the same person? THAT is scary

I know this is the internet but I assumed that like me other aspies would find it very pointless and confusing to create fake identities and to manipulate. just.. what for? plus we are all anonymous anyway!
I honestly don't understand it. Can someone help here? why change accounts?

Quote:

I personally find myself spending far more time than I expected here for two reasons:

1) I have actively seeking a girl for a serious relationship and would like to identify what issues/differences she might have. I am interested in hearing about things like PMS, periods, etc because my parents never talked about them and I was rejected by girls in grade school. I was a very late bloomer and even had to have someone explain what exactly a vagina was... as an adult I do try to be respectful and have been trying to unlearn all the negative opinions I have of girls thanks to online dating and the corresponding nasty, arrogant profiles. It never struck me my date might have been more nervous that I if I hadn't read this section.

2) As I recently worked up the courage and posted, I feel like I can communicate and have a discussion better with Women than Men and always wanted to spend my school recesses around the girls (they didn't feel the same). All of my favourite WP posters are female and I am a highly emotional, sensitive male who cries far more than he will ever admit publicly! I appreciate the beauty of the female body (and do not watch porn period) and thanks to being here have realized my remarks to 'beautiful' women about their bodies were unintentionally seen as sexual in nature.

I greatly appreciate your desire to understand women better and respect us

leafplant
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02 Apr 2014, 2:08 pm

linatet wrote:

Leafplant, do you have any evidence about that?

Well, I could maybe assemble some evidence but I really cannot be bothered. You are free not to believe me.

Quote:

I have no idea why someone would create many accounts and pretend they are different people.

Maybe they've been in arguments with other posters or have been banned or have been threatened with banning or have established themselves as one type of person and don't want to risk being perceived differently by others by expressing opinions that are not in line with what their previous (main) persona is expected to be like. This is fairly standard internet discussion board stuff, aspies/etc are not exempt, especially the mild cases who pass for NT most of the time.

Azureth
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02 Apr 2014, 3:06 pm

I for one would be quite disheartened if I were not allowed to post in this forum. Much like GiantHockeyFan I greatly enjoy coming here and getting women's insight into various things and trying to learn more. I do understand there are lots of annoying guys unfortunately. Even as a man, I am often dumb founded why guys seem to have such a hard time understanding things from a woman's pov. Take periods for example, lots of guys like to joke about it or get upset because a woman may become a little irritable, but geez, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out if guys bled out of their you know what every month they'd be really cranky to!

I have always been this way though, when I first learned about periods while most guys were all "ewww" I was genuinely curious about the whole thing as well as PMS and such and went online and looked it all up.

Another big topic that completely baffles me is how guys seem to have a hard time understanding victim blaming when it comes to rape. It completely ASTOUNDS me how most guys I have read and talked to take the approach of "Well, she shouldn't have gotten drunk" or "She should know better than to go to bad areas" etc. etc. I really want to thump these guys on the head.

Believe me ladies, there ARE some guys that do try to understand.

spongy
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02 Apr 2014, 3:37 pm

Wind wrote:

Do you not understand what WOMEN'S discussion means?
I'm really tired of seeing males post in these forums.

Are you able to read Wind?
There is a thread explaining this particular situation at the top of each page on this section.
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt181819.html

That is the official stand and it will remain that way

It is not my personal decission but alex's.

If you have any issue with the way he chose to use this particular section I suggest that you take it with him.

Until I hear anything new from him males are more than welcome to post on this section provided that they are understanding of female issues.
Any post that isnt understanding and mocks/makes fun of a real issue can be reported just like anywhere else in this site.

What you suggest would be ideal but we would need a males only forum for that to work out.

Since alex refuses to make a males only forum there is no females only forum and you may look elsewhere for it.

leafplant
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02 Apr 2014, 3:44 pm

Azureth wrote:

Believe me ladies, there ARE some guys that do try to understand.

Oh we know that.

A lot of us women also try to understand things from the male point of view. For example, I think I know what it must be like to have your prostate examined, or to get kicked in the balls. But sometimes I would like to ask some more questions.

For example, I wonder what does it actually feel like to wake up with an erection. I also wonder what it feels like to have testosterone cursing through your body making you do things you cannot control. Making you angry. Does it feel scary to feel so angry that your face goes all red and the veins on your body are pumped up and is it possible to even think clearly at all when you get hormonally overwhelmed in that way? It would be like the opposite of extreme PMS I guess?

For some reason though, men don't like to talk about some stuff when there are women around. Can't think why.

jrjones9933
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02 Apr 2014, 4:06 pm

spongy wrote:

Any post that isnt understanding and mocks/makes fun of a real issue can be reported just like anywhere else in this site.

Based on the comments in this thread, that standard doesn't work for a lot of people. However, it does help me understand the moderators' apparent tolerance for the kind of posts by men that put women off this forum. If the moderators simply apply the same standards that they apply on the rest of the site, then that does nothing to make this sub-forum a better place for women to post.

If you want to make this an inviting place for women, then the moderators will have to hold the men to a much higher standard than the women, and ignore the inevitable shrieks of, "Unfairness!" The mods will have to give the intent of the sub-forum far more consideration than they give ordinary standards of fairness.

smudge
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02 Apr 2014, 4:11 pm

There's no point talking about it anymore, really.

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I've left WP.

spongy
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02 Apr 2014, 4:12 pm

jrjones9933 wrote:

spongy wrote:

Any post that isnt understanding and mocks/makes fun of a real issue can be reported just like anywhere else in this site.

As I stated earlier: You are all welcome to approach alex!! !.
I tried my best to change things in the beginning and alex kindly told me to let users sound as stupid as they wished.

When I can confirm that he has changed his mind on this or the rest of the mod team agree with my original approach on this issue I will go back to implementing the rules more harshly.

With that said when rules where fully implemented I got complaints from both genders because we hold everyone to the same standard(no jokes mocking serious female issues? in return we expect no jokes mocking serious male issues).

linatet
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02 Apr 2014, 4:21 pm

leafplant wrote:

linatet wrote:

Leafplant, do you have any evidence about that?

Well, I could maybe assemble some evidence but I really cannot be bothered. You are free not to believe me.

Quote:

I have no idea why someone would create many accounts and pretend they are different people.

I wasn't doubting you, I was genuinely surprised.
I still fail to understand why would someone care about their reputation, specially on internet forums where you don't know anyone and you are anonymous. This persona thing is confusing, to be honest. I had a boyfriend that had a different account and pretended to be a girl to be my friend (?). later I discovered he had 3 personas (and probably much more with his online friends). Wtf? If he wanted to talk to me he could just do it without pretending to be someone else!
But maybe I won't ever understand.

Quote:

have established themselves as one type of person and don't want to risk being perceived differently by others by expressing opinions that are not in line with what their previous (main) persona is expected to be like.

what? this is too much ToM. I don't even think I have the capacity to do that. Like you said probably those that are in the border nt/aspie can do it. Or maybe it is something pathological, like pathological lying, or low self-steem.

GivePeaceAChance
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02 Apr 2014, 11:06 pm

jrjones9933 wrote:

spongy wrote:

Any post that isnt understanding and mocks/makes fun of a real issue can be reported just like anywhere else in this site.

all of this is why when I have an actual real womyn's issue I go to one of my safer places, I am here due to my AS and I look in here but I am not opening up too much

Verdandi
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03 Apr 2014, 2:00 am

leafplant wrote:

Well, I could maybe assemble some evidence but I really cannot be bothered. You are free not to believe me.

It's pretty unlikely, so assembling proof would be fairly hard.

Quote:

I've moderated other fora and this is not actually fairly standard internet discussion board stuff. I've known and known of people for years - some for upwards of two decades online - and most maintain a fairly consistent online profile.

Also, most fora I've been on include moderators who are rather quick to deal with sockpuppeting (which is what this is), especially to bypass bans. One forum I currently moderate will merge multiple accounts belonging to the same person, assuming said person wasn't permanently banned. In that case, said person's new accounts are likely to be banned as soon as certainty as to its sockpuppet nature is established.

I wouldn't worry too much about a dozen people creating multiple accounts for the above reasons. It's pretty unusual and rare in my experience for someone to do something like this, and the people who do tend to be extremely disruptive. The entire internet is not 4chan.

Yuzu
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03 Apr 2014, 6:52 am

Verdandi wrote:

leafplant wrote:

Well, I could maybe assemble some evidence but I really cannot be bothered. You are free not to believe me.

It's pretty unlikely, so assembling proof would be fairly hard.

I can think of one instance where this regular poster boasted how she and her brother made a dummy account to flame another poster in one thread. I can't remember exactly but I think the thread was about something to do with Americans and the Brits?
Can't remember her username but I was surprised that she was a regular and seemed very proud of doing it.
What I didn't understand was why she would go all this trouble if she is willing to admit it was her later anyway?

And sometimes I can tell if a new member is someone who has been here before by the way they post. They interact with other members as if they've known them for a long time.

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