Femininity
xxZeromancerlovexx
Veteran
Joined: 24 Jul 2010
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,915
Location: In my imagination
I am a feminine cis girl, but sometimes I'm surprised when I see others perceiving me in a feminine way, ie guys flirting with me. Because I've always felt genderless in an undesirable and inhuman way due to the way that my own gender has consistently excluded me.
Oh I really hope you gonna find a sisterhood that will support you.
There is people of all kind that will tear you up and others that will do everything do build you up
I would love to have female friends who enjoy makeup and girly things like stuffed animals and going mall shopping. It gets lonely living somewhere where most of the population is guys.
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“There’s a lesson that we learn
In the pages that we burn
It’s written in the ashes of the fire below”
-Down, The Birthday Massacre
AriaEclipse
Veteran
Joined: 4 Jan 2020
Gender: Female
Posts: 743
Location: A basement office with no heat or windows
Looking back at my previous post, I think I'm actually more feminine than I usually think of myself as being. While I've been told at times my interests are 'boyish", lately I've been trying more feminine clothes in colors and a small amount of makeup when I feel like it. It's hard because I don't want to push myself too hard to be somebody I'm not but I think that one benefit of the quarantine for me has been me getting the chance to experiment with my appearance.
I'm not either one, and I'm not some combination of them. I don't consider anyone at all to be masculine or feminine because masculinity and femininity are social constructs (not real personal traits) intended to perpetuate gender roles, and I don't want to perpetuate gender roles because they are harmful, especially to females.
I'm 100% alongside you with this, starkid, that pretty much succinctly sums up my views. I have always been a 'march by my own beat' sort of person, but when I was a very young (cis) girl, I was outright a tomboy and took pride in it, saying how I hated pink and the like. Since I've gotten older, I've become much more comfortable with the idea that I am just an individual who absorbs interests and likes/dislikes regardless of what it means in terms of 'gender.' I wear dresses and skirts, and sweatshirts and sweatpants, depending on how I feel any given day. I love to sew and knit, I love flowers and the color pink, but I also love sci-fi, horror, and laugh a lot at over-the-top gory or scary movie scenes. I pick my nose and belch freely and cuss, not to be obnoxious, mostly all of that is done subconsciously. I say all of that to say, I don't think any of those things make me more or less of a 'woman' - it's just who I am because that's naturally how I am.
Also, none of that is to deny the feelings of others who have posted before me; I think that it's tricky understanding gender/gender roles in our culture, and what it means to you is complex and personal - I just wanted to share my personal experience/feelings on the subject.
*edited post to remove a clarification I didn't think was necessary on reflection*
I have a lot of traits that are considered feminine in the current western societies. Certainly not all and I guess in some aspects I could be considered more masculine, but overall I consider myself to be more feminine than masculine.
I do agree with starkid and greenmm37 that ultimately feminine and masculine are just adjectives that have been used to describe certain human traits/behaviours. Everyone has their own unique mix of human traits, and it's ridiculous to expect that one's biological sex would correlate with a certain set of those traits.
As a child and teen I always assumed I wasn’t very feminine (or girly) because I struggled so much to fit in with other girls at school and socially and at that stage was mostly friends with little quiet boys. I struggled to relate to other girls, it wasn’t that I felt like a boy, it was more I didn’t feel like other girls. And wasn’t into the more stereotypically girly toys and games at that stage. So was a bit surprised as an adult when people said they thought I was very feminine! I guess I am if somewhat unconventionally so. I love flowers, sewing, nature, Vintage clothes, animals etc but love a lot of true crime, medical history, anatomy, cemeteries etc to a friend once discribed it as ‘you’re very feminine but in that way that Morticia Addams is feminine’ if that makes sense?
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Loves Art, Nature, drawing, freehand embroidery,The Bronte Sisters, classic literature, mystery novels, ghost stories, museums, Victorian culture, true crime, cats, collecting
Wow, that's quite a compliment! I'm envious, Morticia Addams is awesome
I was definitely happy with that one!
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Loves Art, Nature, drawing, freehand embroidery,The Bronte Sisters, classic literature, mystery novels, ghost stories, museums, Victorian culture, true crime, cats, collecting